


Gardner & Flower Girl One Shots

by teareadknitsleep



Series: The Romance of Flower Girl and Gardner [3]
Category: Dear Sidewalk (2013)
Genre: Agoraphobia, Eating Disorders, F/M, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:26:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 47,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27861505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teareadknitsleep/pseuds/teareadknitsleep
Summary: Gardner Langway has found his true love in Leah Masters, whom he calls Flower Girl or Flower.  This is a book of One Shots about their romance.  Volume 1 of their story is called Flowers For A Gardner.  Volume 2 is called Flower Girl and Gardner: A Budding Romance.  This book of one shots will carry on from Volume 2 in the timeline and feature vignettes about their courtship, how it develops, and how their relationship continues to become more committed and serious.  There will be bliss, happiness and angst.  And like Volume 2, there will probably be smut, so if that's not your bag, you've been warned.
Series: The Romance of Flower Girl and Gardner [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1870825
Kudos: 4





	1. Paige Returns

Gardner was at a café near campus with his textbooks spread out on the table before him. Normally, he would be at Flower Girl's apartment studying, but lately, their study sessions had been devolving into makeout sessions, and with an important exam coming up, he decided to change venues. He couldn't take a chance on studying at his place either because it was a weekend and Calvin had been making a nuisance of himself, constantly interrupting him, so even a relatively noisy café was preferable to studying at home.

Much to his annoyance, he felt someone tapping him on the shoulder and then saw them plopping down in the other seat at his table. As he looked up, he got the kind of shock that jolted his innards like the hard smack you get when you reach the bottom of the first hill on a rollercoaster ride. Sitting across from him was none other than Paige, his first and only ex-girlfriend. 

"Hi, Gardner," she said with a sultry lilt to her voice, as she ran her fingers over the edge of her thick white porcelain coffee mug. "How've you been?"

"Paige!" he squeaked, about an octave higher than his normal vocal register. "Hey. Oh, uhm, fine. How're you?"

She looked amused and supremely satisfied that she still had the ability to completely unmoor him from his center and knock him ass over teakettle mentally and emotionally with so little effort. She scooched her chair closer to Gardner so she could look at the books arrayed on the table in front of him and scanned their titles.

 _"Astronomy & Astrophysics_, _Understanding the European Union_ , George Orwell's _1984_? A little light reading, eh?"

Gardner blushed out of habit, not used to having anything worth boasting or bragging about, then remembered that he actually was accomplishing something worthy of note and decided to change his demeanor. He cleared his throat, straightened up and sat a little taller. "Actually, I'm enrolled at the university this year and I'm taking classes in astronomy, geography and literature. Those are my textbooks."

Paige gave him a casual look as if he had said nothing terribly special. "Yeah, I know. I saw you on campus one day. I was there giving a guest lecture on contemporary art." As usual, it was all about her and her own accomplishments, her life story. 

"You were on campus, you saw me, and you didn't say hello?" Gardner fumed, taking umbrage at her complete disregard for even the pretense that they were friends. "How come?"

She put up her hands defensively and laid one on his hand, which was clenched. "Easy now. Don't be mad. I was being discreet for your benefit. I saw you with your arm around a girl and I didn't want to interfere."

Gardner blushed again. "Oh. Well, jeez, that was unnecessary. You could have come up to us and said hi. She knows all about you."

Paige frowned. "Oh she does, does she?"

Gardner retorted "Of course she does. We tell each other everything. She knows me backwards and forwards, including my embarrassing love life before I met her."

Paige bridled at this description of their relationship. "Is that what I was to you? An embarrassment?" 

Gardner sighed and said "Paige, do you really want to go there?"

Paige retorted "Well you're the one who said it, not me. That's kind of hurtful. I don't think of you as an embarrassment."

Gardner decided to try to placate her. "I just meant that it was kind of an unsuccessful attempt at a relationship and I felt embarrassed that it went nowhere and burned out so fast. Okay?"

Paige nodded, apparently satisfied with his explanation. She drummed her fingers on the table. 

"She's kind of young, isn't she?" she asked, trying to sound only casually interested and not at all invested in the answer.

Gardner let out an involuntarily hoot of laughter. "Wow! Uhm, well, she's not _that_ young. I mean, she's not jailbait, if that's what you mean. She's in college and she lives on her own. If you mean is she decades younger than you, then yeah, she's young."

Paige got a look like thunder on her face. "Kind of a low blow there, Mister."

Gardner said "Well I don't know what you expect me to say, Paige. You're the one who brought up her age. Let's put it this way, she's a lot closer to my age than you were."

"Fair enough," Paige conceded. "Still, she's awfully chunky. You could do a whole lot better, Gardner," she sneered. 

Gardner's visage cycled through various stages of emotion, from hurt to indignation, to molten fury, then finally to stone cold disdain. "To me, Leah is perfection personified. She's a voluptuous goddess. She's the most gorgeous woman I've ever laid eyes on."

Paige reared back as if she'd sustained a smack to the chops. "Present company included?" she inquired.

"Indeed," Gardner affirmed, crossing his arms and nodding his head firmly. 

Paige had the temerity to look offended. "Well," she huffed "you really know how to insult a girl."

"I could say the same for you," he parried. "You seem to be an expert at it as a matter of fact. Why else would you criticize the weight and figure of the woman I love?"

She tried to assume the guise of the innocent, wounded, sincere friend. "Hey, I was just speaking from my heart. I have your best interests in mind, Gardner. I just want you to be happy."

He shook his head disbelievingly. "No you don't. You want to inflict maximum damage. God knows why. You don't want me. You kicked me to the curb."

Paige slithered her hands up his crossed arms. "Ahhh, now that's where you're wrong. I still think you're the bees' knees, Gardner. And besides, I didn't kick you to the curb. You're the one who decided to end our friendship. My door was always open."

He scoffed and leaned back, shrugging her off, freeing himself from her touch. "That's not how I remember it, Paige. You went off and found your new life's identity, got a fancy new job and a rich new boyfriend, and suddenly you had no more time for dorky little me. But I didn't care. I'd had enough of you anyway. I finally saw who you were and realized that I didn't want or need you in my life either."

Paige pouted. "You're all wrong, Gardner. You have no idea who I am. You didn't give me a chance to show you. You were so closed off, so busy dotting your I's and crossing your T's, staring at that damn sidewalk." She plastered a bright smile on her face and flung her arms out expansively in what Gardner thought was a patronizing manner. "But now look at you! You're out in the world! Getting an education, trying new things! I'm so proud of you. This is the Gardner I knew you could become."

He glared at her with disgust and discontent in his expression. "Paige, you just don't get it. You never did accept me for who I was or am. You were only interested in trying to change me, and you only wanted to use me to see yourself reflected back in my existence. I was just there for you to use, extinguish and then move on."

"That is so not fair, Gardner." Paige tried again to close the physical distance between them. She leaned in and breathed in his scent, making it obvious that she was experiencing some sort of primal arousal. She reached for his hand and took it in hers. "You and I, we had chemistry. We laughed together, we told each other our deepest secrets. You can't deny that I opened you up to yourself and the world."

Gardner tore himself away from her and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "Yeah, and where did that get me? I told you my secret about my parents abandoning me and what did you do with it? You just let it pass by you as if I told you the local Piggly Wiggly had a sale on bananas. You did nothing useful with that information. Didn't comfort me, didn't try to find out more about the backstory, didn't try to figure out how it shaped my personality and outlook on life, didn't ask me anything other than did I ever try to find my parents. Then you were off and running with your own problems again. It was all about you. That's your MO, Paige. Ultimately, it's always about you.

"The day we had sex, I was on cloud nine, and by that night, you decided to dump me during our first date. I had no say in the matter. And you never even really did explain it to me. I mean, what does 'We don't mesh well,' even mean? I never could figure that out. You're just a self-centered, flaky person. So no. I refute your assertion that we had chemistry. You had whims and fancies that you satisfied and I was just there for you to objectify in order to gratify yourself."

At that moment, Gardner's gaze shifted from Paige to just over her left shoulder and his whole demeanor changed. His eyes softened, a smile split his face, and his body loosened its defensive posture. Flower Girl had arrived to pick him up and bring him to his home so he could change his clothes. They were going to go out for dinner. 

She was wearing a simple plum-colored sheath dress with a plunging neckline. Adorning her right shoulder was a cheeky brooch in the shape of a blowsy yellow floral bloom. Her hair was pulled to the side to highlight both the flower and the column of her long neck. She had finished the outfit with kitten heels of the same color as the dress. 

Paige's head whipped around to detect what had caused Gardner's transformation, since she knew it certainly wasn't her own personal magnetism or charm. Spotting Flower Girl, she gave a low growl and said "Oh great. It's the child. Is she here for her evening bottle?"

Gardner issued his own low growl: "Paige, I swear, if you say anything..."

"Don't worry, Gardner, I'm not here to cause trouble."

Flower Girl reached the table and gave Paige a puzzled look but didn't pay her much mind. Her eyes, as always, were on Gardner. She hugged him firmly and gave him a kiss on the lips that conveyed her usual message whenever they had been parted – even when it was just a matter of hours – that said _"I've missed you and I love you."_

Out loud she said "Hi, Sweetie. Who's your friend?" and nodded with a friendly smile towards Paige. "Hey there. I'm Leah." She stuck her hand out to her and waited for what seemed an inordinately long time for Paige to grimace, accept it and shake it, then unsubtly wipe her hand on her pants as if she had just caught a case of the cooties. It was the height of ungraciousness and immaturity, and Gardner frowned at her and shook his head in disgust.

Paige said "Aren't you going to introduce me, Gardner?"

Gardner cleared his throat and said "Oh, yeah. Flower, this is Paige."

Flower Girl was momentarily taken aback, but quickly regained her composure and managed to look friendly, albeit curious. "Oh! Well gosh, it's nice to meet you, Paige. I know it's trite to say, but Gardner's told me so much about you."

Paige rolled her eyes. "I'll just bet he has." She paused a beat, then rewound the audio tape in her head. "Wait, Flower? Did Gardner just call you Flower?"

Flower Girl laughed and fluffed up her giant floral brooch. "Yeah, it's just a nickname. You can call me Leah though." 

Paige narrowed her eyes, as if she were storing the information away for use as ammunition later. "Mhmmm. So, you look very dressed up, Leah. Where are you two kids heading?" She emphasized the word _kids_ with malicious scorn that Leah pointedly ignored but Gardner snorted at with annoyance. 

"Gardner is taking me out for dinner tonight for my birthday to an Italian restaurant that we both love."

Paige gave a haughty, sarcastic laugh. "Oh, yeah, _that_ place. He took me there on a date once. I think you might be a tad overdressed for it though, honey."

By now Flower had picked up on the simmering tension between Gardner and Paige, and Paige's hostility towards her, and finally decided to put the bitch in her place. 

"No, not _that_ place! That place was just a goof. Calvin set Gardner up for a prank telling him to take you there. He didn't know any better. No, we're going to Giovani's." She was referring to a fancy Italian hotspot that required reservations a month in advance.

Paige conceded "Humph, well isn't that nice? So he never took you to that dive he took me to?"

Flower Girl threw herself into her effort of demolishing Paige enthusiastically now. "Sure, he took me there. When we first started going out."

Paige scoffed. "Ha! What did you think? Were you impressed? I'm surprised you kept dating Gardner after he took you to such a cheapo dive."

Flower Girl said "Oh, I thought it was a hoot. There was the ghost of this really awful person flying around the room and we chased it out of the restaurant. The owners were really grateful to us and they comped us our meal."

Paige sucked in her breath sharply and absorbed Flower Girl's comment as if she had been slapped in the face. 

Flower Girl tapped Gardner on the shoulder and said "I think we really should go now, Sweetie. We need to get to your place so you can change and then go to the restaurant."

Paige remarked "Still have your women driving you around these days, Gardner?"

Gardner opened his mouth to retort but Flower Girl put her hand on his arm to stay his reply. She said "Actually, Gardner drives nowadays, he just doesn't have a car yet. He's saving for one."

With a look of astonishment, Paige turned to Gardner and asked "You _drive_ now?"

Gardner said "Yeah, I drive. I just needed to meet the right person to give me a reason to want to, and to have the patience to help teach me." He looked lovingly into Flower Girl's eyes and said "Flower is everything I was looking for and gives me things that I didn't know I wanted or needed."

Paige fumed "Well that's just ducky."

Gardner gathered up his stuff as Paige and Flower Girl eyed each other warily. He stood up and he and Flower Girl started to leave the table. Paige awkwardly followed them. She noticed that Gardner had one hand on Flower Girl's shoulder and the other on her ass as he guided her through the crowded café. She seemed to be glancing down, not looking up at all. They were a perfectly functioning unit, like a pair of ice dancers who had executed this move a hundred times before. She admired and envied their familiarity and synchronicity. 

When they reached the door Paige said "Well it was nice meeting you, Leah. Gardner, we should get together sometime. I'm on campus once in a while in the art department."

Gardner looked at her, then at Flower Girl. Flower Girl shrugged her shoulders as if to say _"Hey, it's your call, do what you want."_ They were wont to have silent conversations, but this one didn't need to be long or involved. He appreciated her leaving it up to him to decide. In his mind, there was never any doubt how he would respond.

"Paige, I don't want to meet up with you. I didn't enjoy speaking with you today and I doubt it would be any different in the future. We closed the door on the past this afternoon and there is nothing productive to be gained by further conversations. Let's just put it this way – we don't mesh. I'm sure you understand."

Paige took a step back as if he had bodily shoved her. When she regained her equilibrium, a small smile quirked up the corners of her mouth. "Sure, I get it. Okay. Well, take care of yourself, Gardner. And you take care of him too, _Flower_." She drawled out the nickname with a sarcastic disdain that revealed how small and petty a person she really was, merely affirming the wisdom of Gardner's decision to cut her loose. 

When they got to the car, Gardner stopped and took a moment to check in with Flower.

"Hey, Flower. Sorry about that. I had NO idea Paige was going to ambush me in there."

Flower Girl grinned at him. "It's okay, Sweetie. I quite enjoyed myself. She came to smash, but I think I more than acquitted myself in returning her volleys, don't you think?"

He clasped his hands around her waist and gathered her in for a squeezy hug. "You kicked her ass, Flower. Game, set and match."

A joyous giggle burbled up from her chest that set her floral brooch jiggling. Gardner's eyes followed its undulations with fascination, then he let his gaze travel down the rest of her body.

"God you look gorgeous, Flower. I didn't say it back there in front of Paige, and I should have, but you look absolutely incandescently radiant."

Flower's skin turned pink with pleasure and heat. "Wow, that's the kind of compliment I'd read in one of my romance novels, except none of those authors is as eloquent as you are."

Gardner said "Well feel free to stash that line away in case you ever decide to write one yourself." He ran his finger lightly along the side of her neck that was exposed, from which her hair was swept away. "Your skin is all flushed," he observed.

"That's what you do to me when you talk to me like a lover," she confessed. "You get me all hot and bothered."

He said "Well you make me feel like one. You inspire me to say and do things I never thought I'd have the courage to conquer."

"Like driving?"

Gardner waved his hand away. "Pffft. Oh, that's the least of it. I mean, yeah, that was a big deal, but no, I mean, like loving, and opening myself up to you, bearing my soul, making myself vulnerable, letting you see who I really am and trusting you to know what to do with that information."

"Oh, Sweetie. It's the easiest thing in the world to love you."

Gardner observed with a hint of bitterness in his voice "Maybe for you. Not for Paige."

Flower Girl palmed his cheek and scritched at his stubble with her fingernails. "I don't think it would be easy for her to love anyone but herself. And maybe not even that. I think maybe she doesn't even love herself. She's like a snake eating itself from the tail up."

"You're probably right."

"I'm proud of you for saying you're not going to see her anymore, not leaving yourself open for more disappointment and abuse from her. Take it from someone who really knows. The only thing you can do to protect yourself from people like that is to cut off all contact."

"Yeah. I don't think I'd have figured that out if you hadn't shared with me your story about your ex-boyfriend, The Abusive Bastard. So even though it kills me that you went through what you did with him, I'm grateful to you for sharing your experience with me. No, not just your experience – your strength and your hope as well."

Flower Girl's lips began to quiver and her eyebrows rose in surprise. She had never once thought that there was anything remotely redeeming about her experience as an emotionally and sexually abused woman. A surge of gratitude overtook her, and for once she for once she felt like she held some power and agency over her status and was not just a victim. 

"Wow. When you put it like that, I don't feel like such a victim. I feel like more of a healer. Or an advocate. I can see how you feel like that relationship with Paige was abusive in some ways. The power dynamic was skewed."

Gardner nodded. "It's worse than that. The way she approached me today was really skeevy. She _knew_ about you and me and that we were dating. She had seen us together on campus. And yet she still tried to manhandle me and get me to dump you and agree to go out on a date with her."

Flower Girl looked dumbfounded. "She did? Wow, what a cunt!"

Gardner shrieked "Flower!"

"What? Look, I know that's a strong word. I only save it for special people, but she's one of them. She earned it."

He laughed. "I guess so. Well, whatever you call her, she plays dirty. If only for that reason, I have no respect for her. She tried to guilt me into believing that I was the one who had been responsible for our relationship going south and our friendship ending. Can you believe the nerve of that woman?"

"Yes, I can. She sounds just like The Abusive Bastard, Tab. Narcissists are like that. It's all about them except when it comes to responsibility. Then it's never their fault. He was the same way. Whatever I did, it was never enough, and whatever I asked for, it was always too much. Everything about my role in the relationship was never the right thing and it was always inadequate. He would gaslight me into believing the sky was orange with purple stripes if it suited his purpose."

"Yeah, Paige more or less tried to do the same thing. She denied she ended our friendship, said she didn't even end the relationship, acted like she didn't walk out on me in that Italian restaurant and leave me sitting there, devastated. Oh, hey, that was hilarious what you said about the ghost in the restaurant. About the owners comping us a meal in gratitude for chasing her nasty ghost out of there!" Gardner started to crack up.

Flower Girl joined him in giggling "I wanted to say the ghost was a bitch, but I didn't want to get too far down in the muck with her and unleash profanity on her. You know how I can get when I go down that road."

Gardner smirked. "Yeah, I've been privy to your gutter mouth from time to time. Actually, I think it's really hot."

Flower Girl quirked up her eyebrows and gave a wide smile. "Oh you do? Well color me surprised and just a little bit instantly moist between the legs."

Gardner pulled her in for a kiss which he used to explore every crevice of her mouth. He ran his hands lightly over the exposed skin of her cleavage as she shivered and teetered in her heels. 

She murmured against his lips, panting a little "Gardner, you are not getting out of taking me to dinner at this fancy ass restaurant by getting me all het up in this parking lot. You realize that, right?"

He smiled and continued to probe her mouth and stroke her skin "Of course, Girlie. Dinner first, then dessert later."

She said "Dessert meaning me?"

"Yup," he affirmed, gave each of her nipples a small tweak, then stepped back, adjusted himself in his trousers, cleared his throat and held out his hand for the car keys.

"You want to drive?" she asked.

"I thought I would if you don't mind. It might help me get my hormones back in check."

"Excellent plan."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment, give kudos and let a friend know that this story exists. I'd like to know who is reading this story and it's a pleasure to interact with you. Thanks for reading.


	2. We Are Inn Love - Friday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a multi-part story that takes place over a long weekend. The chapter headers will be the days of the week on which the action takes place.
> 
> Note that the rating has been upped to Explicit.

** Friday **

"Woah, this place is something straight out of the romance novels I read, Sweetie," Flower Girl marveled as she took in her surroundings. She and Gardner were walking from their car to the front porch of the inn where they were staying for the weekend. Gardner had decided to inject a bolus dose of romance into their relationship by surprising Flower Girl by with a long weekend stay to celebrate the successful completion of their mid-term exams. Since it was March and not high season, he'd gotten a special reduced rate that he felt he could afford to splurge on.

The Mansion Inn in Gruene, Texas was a Victorian confection with wrap-around porches on both of its stories. A rounded turret highlighted one corner of the building. The balconies were hemmed in by ornate gingerbread railings. On the porch sat numerous rocking chairs begging for bums to warm their seats. Flower Girl eyed them longingly as Gardner steered her firmly by the shoulder towards the front door.

By now Gardner prided himself that he could read his girl's thoughts and desires pretty accurately. "First let's check in and then you can sit and rock to your heart's content, Flower," he gently admonished her.

She shook herself from her dreamy state and said "Of course, silly! I want to see everything inside first!"

Gardner gave a goofy attempt at a seductive grin and said "If I have anything to say about it, you might not make it back out onto the porch, Girlie."

Flower Girl flippantly gave one of her laughs that reminded Gardner of tinkling bells that ring when you open a shop's front door. She said "Okay, big boy. That's _my_ jam. I'm the agoraphobic in this couple. You're supposed to be encouraging me to leave the inn. Remember?"

Gardner chuckled "Don't worry. I've got all sorts of plans for you. Gonna blow your mind in fact."

This uncharacteristic bravado caused Flower Girl's jaw to slacken somewhat and her mouth formed an O. She raised an inquiring eyebrow but Gardner just shook his head, indicating he wasn't ready to discuss the matter any further and she knew from past experience not to push it. Either it was a surprise or it was something that he was needing to work up courage for, and whatever it was, he had to come to it in his own time. That's just how Gardner rolled and she had pledged that she was down for supporting his way of doing things.

"Okeydokey," she said and just tossed her red wavy hair insouciantly as if she wasn't burning up with curiosity and just a little apprehension.

They were given the keys to "Bertha's Room" on the second floor. They carried in their bags and both stood agape at the splendor arrayed before them. They were surrounded by emerald green painted walls and gleaming, dark, rich wooden floors, wall trim and furniture. Said furniture consisted primarily of a queen-sized bed with an elaborately carved headboard, plus a couple of arm chairs upholstered in dark brown leather. The bed had a white Matelassé coverlet and an extra quilt at the foot of the bed was also white with redwork embroidery. Four plump pillows had been provided.

Flower Girl drifted over to the far side of the bed and examined the bedside table. On it sat two bottles of wine, one white and one red, both of Texas vintage. She held one aloft and said "Oooh, this will grease the skids for me to seduce you later, my sweet, innocent, shy boy." She waggled her eyebrows and winked dramatically for emphasis as Gardner blushed becomingly.

He sidled up to her and looped his arms around her waist. "What makes you think I need liquid fortification to get nekkid with you, Goddess?" He started to press kisses up the column of her neck until he reached that spot under her jaw that always made her shiver.

Flower Girl replaced the bottle on the table so that she could throw both her arms around Gardner's neck and hold on for ballast as he began to slowly dissolve her center of gravity with his lips, tongue and teeth. By now he had made it to her earlobe and was nibbling and sucking at it gently, while he huffed moist puffs of breath in her ear.

"Should, should we..." She gasped as Gardner began to scrape his teeth over the shell of her ear, and the power of speech seemed to leave her.

"Yes? What is it you want to ask me, Flower? Speak up," he teased her.

She gulped and tried again. "I was going to, going to say, should we make a start on these big plans you have, but I, now I..."

"Yes?" he prompted her, as he let his fingers join the action and grip the other side of her neck, scratching and massaging as they made their way into her hairline and up to her scalp.

"Ohhhhh, that feels sooooo gooood," she moaned.

Keeping his voice low and gentle but very firm, Gardner said "I think we should do things a certain way this weekend. You know me, that's kind of how I do things. But I think we ought to take it up a notch and let me be in charge of everything. Okay with you?"

Flower Girl gulped in surprise at Gardner's sudden dominance. She quickly conducted a mental inventory as to whether this felt playful and loving, or whether it was veering off course into dangerous territory. Being a survivor of a sexually and emotionally abusive relationship with her last boyfriend, she was instinctually on guard for triggers that might accidentally cause a flashback or even an unhealthy dynamic to develop between her and Gardner in their relatively new relationship.

"Uhmmm, okay, as long as you remember what I've lived through and don't violate any boundaries we've set in the past."

Gardner jerked his head back so that he could look Flower Girl in the eye. "Of course. I know what you're driving at. No, never. I'd never do anything to brutalize you or harm you, Flower. I just wanted you to let me take care of you this weekend. In every way. Leave the thinking to me. This is my gift to you. I planned it all out already. That's all I meant. I want to be your knight in shining armor. Your romance novel hero. You see what I mean?" He looked at her hopefully, with an open and guileless countenance.

She nodded, the tension receding from her face and body. "Okay. I understand. I will let you dote on me. Is that what you mean?"

"Yes. That's what I mean. I've never had anyone to take on a vacation, to make a big, sweeping romantic gesture for, and I've already put a lot of thought into it. So let me do this for you. And yes, to a certain extent, let me be the alpha dog for a bit like I never have been. That's sort of a fantasy for me. I'll take care of you and I won't overstep my boundaries."

"Okay, Sweetie. I trust you. I have to admit, it's nice having someone who wants to do considerate things for me, to cherish me."

"Let's add that to the list of the things I vow I'll do for you – to cherish you."

Flower Girl's mind drifted back to their moonlight rowboat adventure on Valentine's Day, when they exchanged vows of commitment to each other, to love, honor and trust each other.

"Okay. It's a deal."

"So here's what I think we should do next. You were eyeing those rocking chairs like they were sirens singing your name, so let's go do that first. There's not that much time until we have dinner reservations anyway, and that's going to be a crowd situation for you, so that will give you some time to just chill out. Okay?"

Flower Girl exhaled a gusty giggle. "Oh! I thought you being bossy meant you were going to push me way out of my comfort zone all weekend long!"

Gardner palmed her cheek and rubbed it gently. "I'm going to ask you to do some things that aren't totally _in_ your comfort zone, yes, but not today. But for right this moment, I know how you think and that you need to rest and regroup and acclimate to this new place. And don't worry, I will be doing stuff that is entirely outside of my own comfort zone, hopefully."

Flower Girl gave him the side eye and inquired "What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

Gardner just shrugged his shoulders and said "All in good time. Everything will be revealed when it's meant to be. Now why don't you grab your sunglasses and your latest trashy romance novel you're reading and we'll go plant our backsides on a couple of rocking chairs?"

She smiled and reached for her large handbag. "All set," she said.

Gardner placed his hands on her shoulders and said "One more thing before we go, Flower. Don't forget that no matter what we do this weekend, you can use your safe word – flowers – and we will evacuate the scene or bail out or do whatever needs to be done to make sure you feel safe and comfortable. Okay? Nothing has changed in that regard. I just wanted to give you a little support in stretching your wings a bit this weekend. I want to open the door and help you grow, but I don't want to change who you are, you see what I'm saying?"

Flower Girl nodded.

They spent a blissful couple of hours, first taking a short circuit around the property to observe the inn's other cabins and outbuildings and their new surroundings, and then settling down on a couple of rocking chairs on the porch. Flower Girl read her dog-eared paperback, and Gardner wrote in a notebook he had started carrying around with him. It contained stray thoughts, more formal journal entries, to-do lists, lists of dreams for the future, doodles, and attempts at poetry. This last type of entry emanated from a class he was taking this semester, _The Romantics versus the Realists: Poetry Through the Ages_.

"Whatcha workin' on, Sweetie?" Flower Girl probed.

"None of your beeswax," Gardner replied and stuck his tongue out at her.

"Oooooh, well excuuuuuse me! I didn't realize that notebook had become so sacrosanct!" she laughed. In her mind, she wondered whether this was a retrenchment on the progress she and Gardner had made in their agreement not to hide anything from each other, or whether he was just using the notebook as an outlet to process his feelings before sharing them with her. Only a few months ago, they had had an epic confrontation when Gardner initially refused to share with her the story of how his parents had abused and abandoned him and it had culminated in a standoff that almost caused them to break up. She decided that everyone was entitled to have a private venue for their feelings and that whatever it was that he was writing truly was none of her business. To reassure him that she had no concerns about his private scribblings, she added "I'm glad you feel like you can get your thoughts and feelings down on paper and out of your head and heart, Sweetie. That's very healthy and mature of you."

Gardner rewarded her with a relieved and grateful smile. Returning to his scribblings, he drew hearts around the words "Leah Flower Girl Masters Langway," "Leah Masters-Langway," "Leah Suzanna Langway," and then surrounded the hearts with a border of question marks to indicate his uncertainty as to which appellation his girlfriend would choose should he be fortunate enough to someday convince her to marry him. He giggled under his breath as he realized he was using his journal more like a kid in junior high school with his first crush than the mature man Flower Girl was imagining he was at this moment.

The sun finally began to desert them and it was getting chilly, plus it was getting close to dinner time, so they returned to their room. Flower Girl changed into some dark blue jeans and a creamy white blouse with a plunging neckline and a square peter pan collar, cinched at the waist by a sash. Gardner wore a grey denim button-down shirt with a black t-shirt peeking out from underneath, with black jeans. Flower Girl had gone shopping with him and selected this outfit after seeing him in nothing but schlumpy, formless clothes since they met and convincing him that he was hiding his light under a bushel. The jeans were slim and hugged his ass and thighs deliciously. The rough denim made her want to run her hands over his chest and backside, and seeing no reason not to indulge her urges, she suited her impulses to the deed.

"Mmmm, you look and feel sooooo, good, Sweetie," she purred as she let her hands caress his chest and trace his torso until they slipped down his back and found a home in his back pockets. She squeezed his cheeks firmly and pulled him in towards her uncharacteristically assertively, which made Gardner growl with surprised appreciation.

"Wow, what's gotten into you, Flower?" he asked, as he pressed into her even closer, seeking relief for his instantly inflating erection.

"I don't know. I guess it's you in those new clothes. I'm not used to you looking so utterly edible," she sighed as she let her eyes roam freely over his person, giving the impression that she was at least mentally already consuming him.

"Hmmm, well, I guess I'll have to up my game with my wardrobe. Or maybe not, if I ever want to get where I need to go." He looked at his watch and noticed the time. "As much as I'm enjoying this flattering attention, we really should get going if we want to make it to the restaurant on time. I made us a reservation."

She reluctantly released him from her grip and he gave a small jump and a giggle as she goosed him from behind when he turned away from her.

"Down girl!" he joked. "Save it for dessert."

"So where are you taking me for dinner, Sweetie?"

"I booked us a table at a semi-fancy restaurant that serves German food. This town was founded by people of German descent, so I figured it's like when in Rome, do as the Romans do. Does that sound okay to you?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, that sounds fine. Plus, if it's kind of fancy, I assume it won't be that crowded or noisy, which is very okay with me."

Gardner smiled and said "Yep, I took that into consideration as well. I figured you'd want somewhere mellow to eat tonight."

Flower Girl gave him one of her incandescent smiles that let him know how much she appreciated how well he looked after her and her hangups – the agoraphobia, the panic disorder, and the generalize anxiety the she suffered from. She didn't need to verbalize it anymore at this point.

They had been together for long enough for him to know what the smile meant. He just nodded his head in acknowledgement. The smile said "thank you," the nod said "you're welcome." They had begun to build a silent vocabulary that honored each other's quirks and weaknesses built on experience, instinct and empathy, of which they were both very proud and for which they both were grateful.

They had dinner at the Alpine Haus Restaurant, which served traditional German food. The atmosphere was homey, with the restaurant being located literally in a quaint, small house, with daintily painted white trim on the outside and whitewashed brick on the inside. Given that there was a bit of a chill in the evening air, the heaviness of the dishes offered felt appropriate.

They opted for big frothy mugs of German beer and chose a few things to sample and share. They had schnitzel, sauerbraten and a huge sausage platter, plus potato dumplings and red cabbage. Flower Girl protested that she could not possibly eat so much food, but Gardner insisted that he wanted a smorgasbord.

"That's a Swedish tradition, Sweetie, not German," she observed with amusement.

Gardner shrugged his shoulders. "Oh well, you know what I mean."

Flower Girl relented and handed her menu back to the waitress, who was garbed in a traditional German dirndl outfit.

"Okay, but just know this – I am NOT a member of the clean plate club. My mom used to make me eat everything on my plate and it really messed with my head. Now that I'm on my own, I only eat to the point of fullness and then I stop, no matter what. I've never said so, but I kind of have some eating issues, too. So you can throw that on the heap of mental health problems I'm toting around."

Gardner nodded comprehendingly. "I kind of already picked up on that, but I was waiting for you to say something. I knew you had body image issues. The first time you got naked with me you called yourself fat, which isn't true, or at least I don't think it is. I appreciate your letting me know that you feel like you need me to understand you have boundaries around what you eat. I'll never force you to eat something or comment on what you eat. And if I ever do unintentionally cross a line, you should just let me know."

Flower Girl said "Thank you. My mom has always been very thin and would always fret and obsess about her weight. And ever since I can remember, literally since I was a toddler, she's been on me about my weight and about eating too much, but she's also forced food on me because to her food means love and it's what mothers do for their children. It's been such a mindscrew. And then there's my dad, who very often eats nothing all day, supposedly because he's too busy working, and then he comes home at night and scarfs down massive amounts of food and I think he really was looking for a binge buddy in me, but his excuse was that he just wanted to spend time with me. I really think both of them have eating issues as well."

"So you think you learned it from them?"

Flower Girl shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. Sort of. I also think that some of it is just who I am. I feel like I'm constitutionally built to put on weight and be full-figured, and there were other societal factors that affected my body image. And it wasn't just my parents who caused me to have a fucked up relationship with food. I often turned to sweets to soothe myself when I'd have a panic attack. They would act almost as a drug to help me numb out."

"So what has helped you change your approach?"

"I have a good therapist, for one thing, though I've never actually talked to him about the eating issues, but he's helped me with my overall mental health and relationship with my parents. And for another thing, I don't live with my parents anymore. I'm not constantly seeking their approval and I'm not around their dysfunctional behavior and thinking every day. I really started getting clarity when I started college. I decided that I was going to just wipe the slate clean and act as if I could have a normal relationship with food, act as if I could love my body." She reached across the table and took Gardner's hand in hers. "You helped me a lot with the body image part. You seem to like what you see when I get naked, and that helps a lot."

Gardner squeezed her hand tightly and said "I don't just like it. I love it. I adore it. I think you're the most beautiful, sensual, voluptuous, gorgeous woman I've ever laid eyes on, and I can't believe I have the privilege of looking at you, never mind touching you and making love to you."

Flower Girl blushed and her chest flushed a streaky, blotchy red. Gardner twitched his long nose and gesticulated with it towards the V of her blouse and said "You're getting hot under the collar, baby."

She whispered huskily "You, you do that to me. My body reacts before my brain can catch up to it."

He took his fingers and ran them lightly up her hand towards the inside of her wrist, stroked her gently a few times, and then placed his hand back in his lap. He shifted the placement of his napkin over his crotch and cleared his throat. "I can relate. Parts of me are running way ahead of my cerebral self right now."

Flower Girl's eyes flicked down towards Gardner's napkin in his lap and then sparkled merrily, crinkling into a jovial smile.

She decided to change the subject. "So, what do you have planned for us this weekend? You said you were intending for both of us to break out of our comfort zones. Care to fill me in now?"

Gardner snapped out of his hormone-induced reverie and shifted into tour guide mode. "Well, none of this is compulsory, and of course it's subject to how both of us are feeling, but I do have a couple of things in mind that I'd like to do. Like I said, yes, I'd like each of us to do one thing that's outside our comfort zone. I just think that doing it here, away from home, where no one knows us and during a weekend where there's no time pressure and plenty of time to recuperate would be the perfect opportunity."

Flower Girl said cautiously "Ooookaaaayyyyy, it sounds like in theory, that could be a good thing. What did you have in mind for me?"

Gardner said "Well, I was trying to research this town and I visited their website, and frankly, there's not a whole heck of a lot to do that's novel and touristy that you and I would be all that interested in. And since neither of us is really into the great outdoors all that much, that kind of limits our options. But they do have an arts and craft market that is open on the weekends and that seemed like it would be something you would want to see."

At first, Flower Girl's eyes lit up with delight. She did love art, crafts and shopping. It was sort of the trifecta of sweet spots for her. But then the reality of the situation dawned on her. Most likely, the setup would mean vendors' booths set up close to each other with hundreds of people milling about, examining the wares, breathing all the oxygen available and producing a cacophony of frightening sounds.

"Oh," was her terse reply.

Gardner read her reaction well. He knew she was tempted but put off by the setting. He soldiered on. "Yes, I know, it would be challenging. But think about it. It will have that 'What's in it for me?' factor that you need as an incentive to help you get through it. Just think of the amazing things you will see while you're there. Forget about the other things that bother you about the setup. If you could go there and be the only person there, would you want to go?"

She nodded. "Yes, for sure. I'd love to go check it all out. It sounds like it's right up my alley."

Gardner said "So how about if we go there for a limited amount of time, and you can shop with the $100 I'm going to give you, my treat?"

Flower Girl frowned and shook her head. "You are not going to pay me to overcome my fears of crowds, Gardner. That's just crazy and kind of insulting."

Gardner grabbed her hand and said "No, I'm not paying you to overcome _your_ fears. I'm going to be paying you to help me overcome _my_ fears. That's part two of this weekend. Remember I said I was going to get out of my comfort zone?"

Flower Girl nodded warily.

He continued on. "Well, I've decided that I'm finally ready to take you up on your offer to help me learn how to drive."

Flower Girl's expression transformed from one of sullen skepticism and resentment to joyful pride. "Really? You're ready to take that step? Oh, I'm so proud of you, honey. That's just ducky! But you don't have to pay me."

Gardner said "Yeah, I do. I did some research on how much it would cost to hire a professional instructor and it's way more than that. So I'm really making you a low-ball offer, frankly." He gave her a sly, mischievous grin. "I'll pay off the rest of my debt in sexual favors, if that's okay with you."

She guffawed at the thought of extracting payment from Gardner in hugs, kisses and other more naughty activities.

"Well, what if I just make you my houseboy and you have to do all your chores naked?"

Gardner looked scandalized. "You'd rather put me to work than work me over? I'm insulted!"

She laughed. "Yeah, well, you know how much I hate housework."

He nodded and rolled his eyes. "Do I ever! I don't think I've seen your bed made even once in all the time we've been together."

She waved her hand dismissively and retorted "I've told you why! What's the point of making it when it's just going to get messed up within a matter of hours again, either for sleep or for fooling around?"

Gardner said "Your logic has a self-serving rationalization that _just about_ convinces me," and gave her a peck on the lips. "As long as you make sure we mess up the bed on a regular basis."

He leaned back and took a sip of beer from his mug. "So what do you think? Should we swap growth experiences this weekend?"

Flower Girl picked up her heavy glass mug and clinked hers against Gardner's. "Yes. Here's to breaking out of our comfort zones."

Just as they finished toasting, a man dressed in lederhosen and playing an accordion came to stand by their table and drowned out all possibility for further conversation. For dessert they shared portions of Black Forest cake and apple strudel. Gardner happily accepted the maraschino cherries that Flower Girl disdainfully plucked off her portion of cake and plopped on his dessert plate. She had always maintained that these objects barely qualified as fruit and had vowed to bequeath them to Gardner forevermore whenever one crossed her path.

When they got back to their hotel, Flower Girl instantly kicked off her shoes and began to peel off her jeans, which by now were feeling way too constricting for her full belly. Gardner sat on the bed and watched her with amusement as she groaned and rubbed her food baby.

"Ohhhhh, even though I said I wouldn't eat past the point of fullness, that food was awfully rich. I need some time to digest before we get up to any mischief, Sweetie."

Gardner snorted "I don't know what sort of acrobatics you think I had in mind, but sure, yeah, that's fine. How about if you take a nice hot bath? There's a tub in that bathroom, I think."

Flower Girl padded over to the bathroom and poked her head in. "Ooooh, yeah, there is! It's got claw feet and everything!"

"Well you go get all relaxed and clean and I'll just do my stretches and warm-up exercises so I don't pull a muscle when we finally do get down to the nitty gritty," Gardner joked.

"Oh, brother," Flower Girl fumed playfully, rolled her eyes and flounced off to the bathroom.

She had left the door open, Gardner noted, debating whether this was just to avoid steaming up the room or whether it was an open invitation. He decided not to push his luck, but as he listened to his girl bathe, he fantasized plans for that tub for another night.

Unbeknownst to Gardner, Flower Girl was sitting in a mass of bubbles in the claw foot tub, wondering why he hadn't taken her hint of the open door and come in to join her. She thought she was being rather brazen and obvious. It's not like she ever left the bathroom door open when she was bathing at home, though to be fair, she hardly ever used her bathtub at home because it was nothing special – just a shower/tub combination and very small at that. Not to mention the fact that, being averse to housecleaning in general and cleaning the bathroom in particular, she was never really sure how clean that tub was, so she shied away from using it.

But here she was now, in an impeccably clean, roomy tub that someone else had prepared for her, soaking in bubbles provided by the management, and she was all alone. That somehow seemed slightly unjust and intolerable to Flower Girl. It went against her overall aesthetic for this romantic weekend and needed to be rectified. But her natural reticence in sexual matters, brought on by the abuse she was subjected to by her previous boyfriend, prevented her from asking for what he wanted from Gardner.

She remembered back to their conversation over dinner. Gardner had said that this weekend was about getting out of their comfort zone. So why were her lips welded shut, even as the place between her thighs was aching for her to call out to him and invite him to join her in the tub? She ran her fingertips over her left nipple, which was poking up from the waterline, and shivered at her own touch, yet she longed for it to be the rougher, more forceful pinch of Gardner's fingers. _'Call him in here,'_ urged her sexual self. She decided to listen and act.

She cleared her throat and called to him. "Sweetie, do you want to come in here?" She felt that a question, a proposal, rather than a summons, seemed to strike the right note. Almost faster than seemed possible, Gardner's head poked inside the room.

"Did you call me, Flower?" There was a note of hope in his voice.

Her lips twitched with a smile as her cheeks relaxed from their tense anticipation into a flush of pleasure and relief. "Yes, I called you. I asked if you wanted to come in here with me."

Gardner seemed guarded and not altogether sure of her meaning. He sought clarity. "You want me to sit with you and keep you company, Girlie?"

Now her brows furrowed and her cheeks squeezed back down into tense folds of frustration as she realized she had to spell it out for him. She would have to ask for what she wanted specifically. _'Doesn't that boy know the first thing about romance and seduction?'_ she thought to herself with annoyance.

She sighed and started again. "No, silly. I wanted to know whether you wanted to, uhm, _join_ me." She fumbled for just the right word but not too many words to convey her meaning.

"Oh!" Gardner exclaimed. "Yes, of course I do!" As he instantly started tearing off his clothes, Flower Girl watched with a mixture of relief and amusement. While he was wrestling with his black t-shirt, he explained in a muffled tone "I wasn't sure if the open door was an invitation or you just wanted to avoid getting the room steamed up, but I wanted to respect your privacy. I always err on the side of caution because of what's happened to you in the past."

By the time he had wrestled his shirt off, he saw his girl sobbing, her mouth agape at his explanation. He rushed over to the bathtub, knelt down and grabbed her hand.

"Flower, Flower, what did I say, what did I do wrong? I'm sorry!"

She put her hands up to her face to shield her distress from him, but he gently pried them away. He wanted to take on all her emotions, even the unpleasant or uncomfortable ones, and particularly the ones for which he felt he had responsibility for causing.

She explained "I thought you were being unromantic. I thought you didn't have a clue about what I wanted and I was scared and unsure about how to ask you for it. But I totally wronged you. I didn't give you credit for being thoughtful and loving and taking care of me like you always do. I'm so sorry, Sweetie."

Gardner rubbed her hands between his and brought them up to his lips to kiss them, one knuckle at a time. "You _do not_ owe me an apology, Girlie. It was just a misunderstanding. We both have expectations of each other that sometimes are going to miss the mark. That's because we're human, and in our case, humans with some pretty heavy-duty baggage. I'll always take that into account in considering anything you do or say. I hope you'll do the same for me, but even if you don't initially, I know that if you're sorry for it later, then that's just as good."

Flower Girl insisted "Well if I'm sorry for something, then I do feel like I need to apologize for it. It closes the circle and helps me learn from it and move on. So even if you don't feel like you need the apology, I feel like I need to offer it and make it. Okay? It's part of the healing."

Gardner nodded. "Okay. I see what you mean." He leaned back on his haunches and studied Flower Girl thoughtfully.

She tilted her head and inquired "What? What are you thinking?"

He said "Just thinking how beautiful you are, inside and out. How can it be that right now, I'm sitting with the most gorgeous woman who's stark naked, and what's uppermost on my mind is what a beautiful soul she has?"

A flood of warmth, affection and affirmation overtook Flower Girl and enveloped her in its tendrils like the steam that swirled from the bathwater.

"Come here," she beckoned, and held out her arms to him.

He finished shucking off the rest of his clothes and climbed in the tub. He knelt in front of her and let her pull him into her arms and hug him. Then he shuffled his body behind hers and pulled her back so that she was resting her head on his chest and he was holding her close to him with his right arm around her. When they were situated comfortably, he intertwined the fingers of their left hands. He let out a long sigh of contentment, which she echoed.

He said gently "Please don't take this as a criticism, but you can always just ask me for what you want, Flower. I'm not the best at reading your mind, as you can see."

"Yeah, I'm figuring that out, though you are getting pretty good at it for certain things. It's just hard for me sometimes. Because of what Tab did to me, my default is to expect criticism or scorn, or to at least be told no or ordered around. So unless I'm putting limits on you, it's hard for me to tell you what I want. It's much harder for me to say I've got a fantasy I want to act out, or please touch me in a certain way, or I'm in the mood so I want to jump you now." She laughed at this last statement, since she couldn't think of a single occasion when she had initiated sex with Gardner. Gardner was just always up for sex and they had plenty of it, so there was never any need for her to take the lead.

"That's not how it should be between us though," Gardner countered. "I remember you telling me when we first started getting intimate that you wanted me to empower you. I still want to do that. I thought I _was_ doing that. But I guess I was doing it in a deferential way, by being respectful of your boundaries and mindful of your past. Maybe we need to be more mindful of your needs in the sexual part of this relationship. Are there things you want that you aren't getting?"

Flower Girl squirmed nervously. "Not in the aggregate, I'd say. But in the particular, I would say that I'm probably dragging around from my last relationship some self-consciousness and reluctance to initiate things. I kind of rely on you to pick up on my silent cues and hope you notice. I'm, I'm ..." She stumbled and stammered to a halt.

Gardner held her more firmly, pulling her in closer and squeezing her hand to try to reassure her. "What, Flower? Go ahead. You can tell me."

She poked her toes up out of the water and wiggled them about nervously. "Well, I'm not really good at dirty talk, I guess. Or being assertive about what I want you to touch when or in what manner, or how I want us to be positioned and stuff. I'm too passive."

Gardner said "So you don't feel like you can either tell me or show me, is that it?"

Flower Girl nodded. "Right. I'm at a loss."

Gardner said "Well, let me think about it. I remember you telling me exactly what you wanted the first time I made love to you with me in the missionary position. That was New Year's Eve, when we were making up after that big fight we had, remember? You said you wanted me to take control of your body and be totally in charge. You said you weren't scared even though I was hesitant about it."

Flower shook her head. "Yes, but that was me giving over control to you. It wasn't me taking control, if you see what I mean."

Gardner mulled it over and agreed. "I think I see what you're saying. So how can I help you feel more comfortable about taking the wheel?"

She said "I think maybe us just talking like this and me getting stuff off my chest has helped out some."

Gardner gave a wolf whistle and said "And what a chest..." and squeezed both her breasts in his palms.

She reached behind him and swatted at his shoulder. "Oh, you! Don't be cheeky!"

He guffawed and released the heaping handfuls of flesh he was holding. Flower Girl paused a beat and then replaced his hands on her breasts. Gardner cooed "Oooh, someone is already asserting herself.

Flower Girl leaned back into Gardner and said "No time like the present. You said this weekend was about getting out of our comfort zones."

Gardner said "Let me assure you, it makes me very comfortable to have you ask for what you want and for you to take the lead in every aspect of our relationship, including sexually. You've never been shy about being vocal about your feelings, so why should this be any different?"

"I have to admit that the minute I saw this bathtub, I imagined us both sitting in it. It's like a scene out of one of those steamy books I read."

Gardner hummed contentedly. "And now you don't have to just imagine. So let that be some positive reinforcement for you, and keep initiating setups this. Let me know what you want and I'll do my best to give it to you."

"O-okay," she stuttered, suddenly distracted and rendered speechless by what Gardner's clever fingers were up to. He had taken up the bar of soap and rubbed it on her breasts and was passing his slippery fingers over her light rose-colored nipples. The cool air, contrasting with the warm water, had raised bumps on the surface of her nipples, and now the added stimulation he was providing was rendering them into stiff, pebbled peaks.

He pinched and pulled at them and watched them retract from her body and then draw in again. She gasped in exhilaration as he performed this maneuver over and over. As he peered over her shoulder to watch the show her breasts were performing, he began to nibble on her neck and press a line of kisses up to her jawline where it met her ear.

"How does that feel, Goddess?" he whispered.

"Amazing," she responded.

"What else do you want?"

"P-pinch me. H-hard. R-really hard, p-please," she stuttered out between pants of breath.

Gardner was used to being very gentle with Flower Girl, worshipping her form and never coming close to anything approaching aggression, again because he was mindful that she had once been sexually assaulted and he thought of her almost as a skittish woodland creature. His own esteem for her compounded the care he took of her, building her up in his mind as a precious being who ought to be revered and cherished in every way. And admittedly, he himself had little sexual experience prior to meeting Flower Girl and had never done anything remotely exotic (other than having sex _on the floor_ with Paige that one time) so he was working solely on his own limited instincts in directing their sex play. Yet with her previous comments in mind, Gardner girded himself to approach their lovemaking with a different mindset.

He rolled her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers and squeezed moderately firmly. "Like this?" he asked her.

"You can do it harder," she encouraged him.

He increased the pressure and drew her flesh away from her body as he had done before. This time she began to pant and breathe heavily again. "Yeah, like that. That's good, Gardner. F-feels good."

"Want me to do it harder than that?"

To his surprise, she agreed "Just a little more."

So he ratcheted up the pressure just a bit more and now she was making the unmistakable sounds of ecstasy. He realized that those were the indicators that he should allow to guide him, as much as her words. She was giving him permission and now it was up to him to find her outer limits. As nervous as he felt about it, he was also excited. It felt like new vistas were opening up to both of them.

He decided to shift gears up a notch with the attention he was giving her neck, adding in some tongue and his teeth. Once more, Flower Girl's respiration kicked up and she moaned "Yes, oh yes, really suck and chew on me. I want you to own me, mark me."

Gardner was shocked. "Really? You want me to give you a hickey?"

Flower Girl nodded. "Yes. Just one. I've always wondered what it would be like. I've read about it a zillion times in my stories, but I've never had one, and I've never been with anyone I'd want to give me one. I want you to mark me as yours, Gardner."

"Okay, I guess I could do that," Gardner agreed dubiously. "But how about if I do it somewhere where it doesn't show, in case you don't like it?"

Flower Girl insisted "No, I want it to show. That's the whole point. You're claiming me."

Gardner shrugged his shoulders and said "Okay then. Come here." He pulled her back into him and clamped his lips down on her neck in a place where her hair could conceal the mark in case she changed he mind about wanting to display it. He sucked and bit and licked until a dark red welt appeared. He drew back and proclaimed "You're delicious."

She giggled and felt the mark with her fingertips. "Thank you. I notice you put it in a safe spot."

Gardner said "Yeah, I kinda chickened out. But I can do another one for you if you really want me to."

She twisted around and kissed him passionately. "That's okay for now. Thank you, Sweetie. Thank you for encouraging me to act out my fantasies and to ask for what I want."

"You're more than welcome. It's my very great pleasure," he said, letting his hands stray back to her breasts. As he kneaded and tweaked them, she began to fidget and rub her thighs together. Gardner peeked over her shoulder again and noticed her squirming.

"Got ants in your pants, Girlie?"

"Mmmm, I am getting kind of twitchy down there, I do confess."

"Is there something I can do to help you out with that?" he asked.

She took his right hand off her breast and guided it to her coochie and curled his pinkie and ring finger in towards his palm, then moved his forefinger and middle finger right over her clitoris for a few moments. Then she took his two fingers and guided them down to her opening and began to push them in. Gardner took over and thrust in and out of her entrance and started to finger fuck her, using his thumb to brush up against her clitoris at the same time.

To his surprise, he felt Flower Girl's fingers join his ministrations, with one finger of hers rubbing her clitoris and another one joining his inside of her. Their three fingers intertwined in her heated cavity, sliding in an out in unison. Gardner's other hand was pinching her breast and her free hand was pinching the other one. Together, they were sharing the mechanisms of pleasuring her, as if they were two halves of a whole.

At this point, Flower Girl was vocalizing more than she ever had before and it went straight to Gardner's dick to hear it.

"Oh, Sweetie. That f-feels so amazing. To meet you inside of myself and be partners in my pleasure. You're blowing my mind." After that she had no more coherent words, just sounds that were sensuous and filthy. Gardner watched her in wonder and admiration as she had the most emotional and loudest orgasm she had ever had with him.

Eventually, her body ceased to vibrate and shake and she withdrew her finger from herself, so Gardner did likewise. He switched to caressing her all over with his hands and fingernails. The aftershocks of her orgasm caused tremors which shuddered through her body, creating small tidal waves in the bathtub. Every time her body reverberated, he smiled at the accomplishment that he shared with her in having caused that result.

"How do you feel, Flower?" he asked her quietly, wrapping his arms around her firmly and hugging her into his body, steadying her quaking body.

"I feel – " she began, then paused to truly reflect and accurately capture her state of being. "I feel liberated. You told me that's what you wanted for me when we first started going out, and now I feel like I truly have achieved that. I'm free. I can lay down my hangups and burdens and put them behind me. I know you won't judge me and that you and I have something completely different than what I had in the past. You accept me unconditionally, even if I want to get a bit freaky."

Gardner turned Flower Girl's face towards him so he could look her in the eye. "Of course I accept you and of course I won't judge you. It's funny because that was always something I feared myself until I met you – being judged and found wanting. I wish I had realized that you were carrying this burden around, but now that I do, I'm glad you feel like you're able to lay it down. I've always wanted you to have everything I could reasonably give you. So as long as you don't ask me to make love to you standing on my head, I think we're good."

She giggled at his characteristic goofiness and kissed him lightly. "I think I'm ready to get out of this tub now, Sweetie. How about you?"

"Yep, me too. I'm kind of dying to break in that bed. It's so big and so neat. Not that that's a commentary on our normal digs or anything."

"Of course it isn't," she huffed good-humoredly and rolled her eyes.

"Hey, you're talking to a guy who spends a good amount of his nights sleeping in a tiny single bunk when I'm not at your place!"

"I think you just don't like getting into my unmade bed. I've told you before that you're welcome to make my bed anytime you want, Sweetie."

"Blech, I'll take a pass. I hate doing someone else's housework even more than I hate getting into an unmade bed or sleeping in my own skinny bed."

She shrugged her shoulders as she rose from the water "Then we're at our usual standoff. Now let's go check out that bed, hmm?"

He stood up and clasped her in his arms. "Sounds like heaven on a stick."

She gasped with laughter at him. "You've been hanging around me too long! You're starting to talk like me!"

"Yeah, Calvin told me that. He says I'm way too cheerful these days. He asked me whether aliens had abducted me and where was his formerly morose brother."

"Did you used to be a grump?"

Gardner glowered at her and said "You have _no idea_." Then his expression cleared and his previous smile returned.

"I'm proud that I've had a positive effect on you then," she said.

He grinned at her and repeated "You have _no idea_."

Flower Girl drifted over to the mirror hanging above the sink and leaned forward in order to examine the hickey Gardner had bestowed upon her. "Hmmm, pretty good for a first effort," she observed.

"Do you like it?"

She turned to him with a shy smile on her twitching lips. "Yes, I confess I do. Does that make me a harlot?"

"No, that makes you my woman. Right? I left my mark on you."

"Right. That's your mark and I'm yours." She sidled up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. After a smoldering kiss, she buried her head in his neck.

He warned her "Hey now, just don't get any funny ideas, though. I'm not sure if I want a hickey. I'll think about it and let you know."

She giggled and said "Of course. I wouldn't do it without permission. Or at least I wouldn't do it where it showed."

Gardner said "Okay, phew! That's okay then. In that case, you can give me one where it doesn't show. Just to see if I like it."

Her eyes lit up like a child who had been told that dessert would be eaten first at every meal henceforth. "Yum!" she crowed.

She pushed him backwards towards the bed until his knees hit the mattress and he lost his balance, plopping down unceremoniously on the immaculately white duvet. Flower Girl surveyed it and said "I think we should pull that off the bed for now. Don't want to muss it up."

Gardner gave her a saucy lift of his eyebrow and stroked his chin. "Ohhhh, so you plan on making a mess with me?"

Flower Girl sauced back "We're going to wreck each other. That I can guarantee."

They quickly took a side each and folded the bedspread down, then set it on one of the chairs. Flower Girl guided Gardner back to the bed, backwards again, until he found his knees once more making contact with the mattress. He found himself fond of this newly aggressive side of his girlfriend and was pleasantly surprised at the electricity it caused to surge to his belly and erogenous zones.

"Okay, Miss Thang, how do you want me, then?" he asked. "You're the boss lady tonight."

She shifted his body so that he was lying properly on the bed, then hovered above him with an air of anticipation.

"What are you going to do with me, Flower?"

"I'm going to lick and bite you from head to toe. How does that sound?"

Gardner gave it a moment's thought. He said "As long as you don't puncture anything or leave a wound, and as long as I don't turn into the undead by the time you're done, I'm good with that."

She laughed and pretended to bare imaginary fangs. "Bella gets her revenge on Edward? I've always thought maybe she wasn't totally down for all the baggage that comes with him chomping her. I think she was mostly in it for the sex because he was so hot and she couldn't keep her legs crossed anymore."

Gardner looked at her in bewilderment and some feigned disgust. "Okay, I know vaguely what you are referring to, only by sheer osmosis I'm sure, because I've never read those trashy books or watched the movies. I have to say I find it disturbing that I understand that cultural reference because I pride myself on being tragically unhip."

Flower Girl started to mouth at Gardner's neck and ears, nibbling and scraping her teeth gently on his skin as he twitched in reaction. She made her way down to his chest, where she spent a few moments tweaking and sucking on his nipples. Prior to coming together with Flower Girl, Gardner had never even known his nipples had any sensitivity, and now this revelation had opened up a whole new avenue of pleasure to him.

He moaned and babbled praise at her as she caressed and sucked his little nubbins. When she bit down on one, he gasped and jolted suddenly a couple of inches off the bed, and she firmly guided him back down and held him there. She soothed his flesh with her tongue again, then started to suck fiercely on a spot just below his nipple. Gardner raised his head up to observe her efforts. When she was satisfied, they both took note of a small reddish-purple mark and they locked eyes.

"I'm yours, Flower. You've marked me."

"Yes, you're mine, Baby Boy."

"Either that or I'm going to need you to get me a blood cocktail, STAT."

They chuckled at the continuing riff on vampire jokes and the Twilight novels and movies.

"I'll order you a Bloody Mary if you take me out for brunch tomorrow. Think you can wait that long?"

Gardner nodded and dropped his head back down on the pillows. "What do you want next, Flower," he asked.

She hesitated again, being both unaccustomed to initiating sexual situations and answering questions about what she wanted. She just always went with the flow, unless it was to temper Gardner's libido on occasions when she didn't feel up for dealing with it.

"I, uhm, well, let's see."

Gardner sat up. He ticked off on his fingers a list he began to recite of ways they had made love before. "We've made love in lots of different positions, and I love them all, but you haven't expressed a particular favorite or suggested something different. So keeping in mind the conversation we just had, why don't you tell me what you want me to do with you, or should I say, what do you want to do to me?"

Flower Girl grinned at Gardner's sensitive rephrasing of his query. "I'd like, I'd like you to take me from behind, but this time maybe be a little more forceful."

Gardner took Flower Girl's hands in his. "Flower, what is this about? Why do you keep asking me to be more forceful with you? I don't want to hurt you. Especially not after what you've been through in the past."

Flower Girl sighed and threw up her hands. "That's just it, Gardner! I'm not some precious piece of porcelain! I'm a flesh and blood woman with sexual desires and needs. I don't want you treating me like damaged goods that are breakable that will snap like a twig. I'm very strong and vital, and before Tab subjected me to his twisted practices, I had a healthy attitude towards sex. I want to have that again now. I for sure know what my body can take and what it craves. It doesn't always want to be gentled. Occasionally it wants to be taken. Not manhandled, but just owned, claimed, given a good workout. Just because I was forced to perform sexually before, that doesn't mean that I can't ask for you to work me over, does it? Or does that make me a slut?"

Gardner's jaw was slack and he seemed at a loss for words. This felt like something of a repudiation of the care and love he had bestowed upon her all these months, and he couldn't figure out whether it was a criticism or a critique. Either way, it stung.

He said a bit sullenly, "No, of course you're not a slut! I was just trying to be good to you and take care of you. You're so precious to me, Flower. I said I'd never hurt you."

"I'm not asking you to hurt me. I'm asking you to use me well. I feel like a race horse who's ready for the Kentucky Derby and you're still leading me around in circles on a lead in the paddock. It's much safer there and I appreciate your shielding and sheltering me, but I think I'm ready to stretch my legs now and see what it's like to reach my full potential. You see?"

"Yes, if you put it that way, I suppose I do. Do you resent me for being so protective of you?"

She shook her head "God no, Sweetie! I'm eternally grateful, and truthfully, it's never really bothered me or been a major issue. I think it was you talking about getting out of our comfort zones that got me thinking about it more this weekend. You really sparked something in me, a new level of growth that I'm ready for, and I want to meet the moment. I feel like a molting snake slithering out of its old skin and moving on all fresh and new into the world with a shiny new surface."

Gardner joked "What is it with you and things with sharp teeth lately?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. I think in cheesy metaphors and similes. I'm minoring in Literature. I can't help it. I'll suffer your proverbs if you'll put up with my metaphors and similes."

Gardner let his hands drift Flower Girl's hips and gave them a firm squeeze. "So," he said. "You want me to take you from behind."

Flower Girl nodded with confidence and certainty.

Gardner gazed thoughtfully at the large, ornately carved wooden headboard. "Get on your knees and hold on to the headboard," he told her, with a tone that let her know it was direction but not a command.

She looked over her shoulder at the sturdy wooden headboard and back at Gardner, then grinned wickedly. "Yes, that will work just fine."

Satisfied that he had her consent and that he knew what she wanted, Gardner's finally allowed his libido free rein. He took a moment to gaze at her heart-shaped hips and ass, just hanging out there in space, waiting for him to do with them what he would, and his heart began to race and his mouth salivated. He pressed on them the same kisses and bites he had given to her neck in the bathtub, chewing lightly and sucking hard, until she had a few more love bites littered across her milky white skin.

"Mine..." he growled as he dragged his tongue up her spine.

She turned around to peek at him and then the small works of art he had left on her and shook her head in agreement. "I'm yours for sure. You've left no doubt now."

He slid his body over hers as she held onto the headboard, draping himself over her and kissing her neck and ears as he used his hands to grasp on to her pendulous breasts that were swaying underneath her. For a few moments, he teased her nipples and listened as she yipped and squeaked in reaction, holding her down in place with the weight of his body. Then he grasped her flesh again and gave the two mounds more overall attention as she panted and writhed.

"You ready for me now Flower?" he whispered in her ear.

"Y-yes, I'm s-s-soooo ready. P-please, t-take me." She wiggled her backside in an effort to attract him to the area where she craved him most.

He took his left hand off her breast and let the other one remain where it was. He trailed his hand down her belly until he had reached her clitoris and began to rub it gently. "How's that, Flower?"

"G-gooood," she said, but she continued to wiggle and push her bum into him.

"You need something?" he asked her.

"Y-yes, I need you _in me_ ," she insisted. " _Now_ ," she emphasized.

"Okay, baby, here I come," he said. He fingered her to make sure she was wet enough for him and found that she was good and soaking. He inserted his forefinger and middle finger inside her to open her up a bit. "How's that?" he asked.

"Come on now, you're just teasing me," she whined.

He laughed. "Yeah, I am. Sorry. Couldn't resist. Okay, here I come."

He pulled his fingers out and breached her with his penis. Since they were in a loving, exclusive relationship, they didn't use condoms and Flower was on birth control. He didn't hold back or enter her gently, like in previous times they had had sex in this position. She had requested a rougher ride and he was going to give her one. He slid in with one strong, gliding motion and filled her right up to the hilt.

"Ooof!" she exhaled as he bottomed out inside her. She clung to the headboard and it made a little _thunk_ noise as it knocked against the wall with the force of Gardner joining their bodies.

"Is that okay, Flower?"

She breathed in and out again, taking a moment to adjust, then she said "Yeah, it's great. Please take me now. I'm ready."

He pulled back and then pushed in again, clasping her hips for leverage. He could feel her pushing back to meet his thrusts. She grunted and gasped "Oh!" each time he filled her up, pressing in forcefully.

"Is that how you want it, Goddess?" he teased her a bit, but he also genuinely wanted to check in to make sure they were on the same page.

She turned her head and winked at him. "Yeah. You're giving it to me good, Sweetie."

He returned her wink and leaned down to press a line of kisses up her spine. He let his hands tweak her breasts and she twitched and moaned. "Gonna make you come again," he promised, and let one of his hands stray down her belly to her core and centered on her sensitive nub. Feeling it was a little too dry, he descended a bit further and collected some of her natural moisture and dragged it back up in order to slick up the bundle of nerves and allow his finger to easily glide over it.

She flung her fiery tresses back and keened with pleasure as he brought her along, teasing out another orgasm. "Oh, Sweetie, yes, yes, yeeesssss..." she encouraged him.

Without removing his hand from her coochie so that she could enjoy the last reverberations of her bliss, he clutched her hip tighter and steered himself towards his own conclusion, puffing out gusts of breath each time he thrust into her and grunting with every incursion into her heat. As the headboard made a corresponding " _thunk, thunk, thunk_ " noise, he plunged in and out of her.

"Unghhhh," he finally groaned as he came with an explosive wave of sensations. Gardner wasn't one for chit chat when he was shooting his load. He usually felt like he was having a conniption fit and was just this side of blacking out. But this time felt particularly stimulating, devastating, almost cataclysmic, owing to the extra torque he was applying. His jaw was slack and although he was sentient, he felt barely coherent. He felt sensitive up to the roots of his spikey auburn hair.

By now, Flower Girl had ridden out her own orgasm and was peeking over her shoulder, watching Gardner and fondly observing his total immersion in his pleasure. She removed one of her hands from the headboard and reached back to stroke his hair.

"Are you okay, Sweetie?" she purred solicitously.

"Mmmmm," he hummed inchoately. He felt his lips buzzing as he pushed out the assenting response.

She lowered her other hand to the pillow then got down on her elbows and took his body down with her, and he followed her, descending to his elbows, trying to keep some of his weight off of her.

"Stay, stay inside of me," she begged him.

"M'kay," he murmured and wriggled closer to her as she slid her legs down so that they were straight, lying flat, and he was fully on top of her. He inhaled her scent deeply. "You smell wonderful, even when you aren't wearing your lilac perfume. I love your _you_ scent."

She giggled and said "Thanks, I guess. I didn't realize I had one. What does my _me_ scent smell like?"

"Flowers, of course," he joked.

"Well I think tonight you're smelling bubble bath mostly, but I get what you mean. I like your smell, too. It's comforting. I smell you in my bed on the nights you aren't there and it makes me feel less lonely."

Gardner burrowed his head into Flower Girl's neck and said "I need to get something of yours to keep in my bed, something that smells like you, for the nights that I don't sleep at your place. Okay?"

"Okay. I'll get on that. Or just help yourself to something of mine."

Gardner warned her "I think I need to roll over now. Nature is taking its toll and is kicking me out of my cozy little haven I've been burrowing in."

Flower Girl took his meaning as she felt his softening cock sliding out of her coochie. "Oh, okay. Let's go clean up real quick and then lie back down."

They ran and took a quick shower to expunge their various bodily fluids, then padded back to the bedroom and put on pajamas. Gardner swooned as Flower Girl donned a pair of tiny boy shorts and a camisole with a fuzzy cardigan over it. He threw on a pair of sleep shorts and a t-shirt.

"That's an adorable new pair of pajamas you've got on," he enthused as he let his fingers roam near her cleavage, letting her magnificent breasts nearly spill out over the top.

She grinned with a gratified expression. "Thanks for noticing. I bought them especially for the trip. I figured I'd splurge."

"I'm going to enjoy peeling those off of you tomorrow," he said, yawning. "But first, I need to recuperate from that session we just had."

"Yes, I think you've earned it. I clearly wore you out." She gave a laugh brimming with satisfaction and confidence. Gardner was gratified to hear it.

As they laid down in the bed together with the light off, Gardner decided a short debriefing session was appropriate and even necessary before he'd feel able to turn off his questing mind and go to sleep.

"Did I satisfy your needs and wants, Flower?"

"Yes, you did." She paused a beat and then added her own inquiry. "Did I make them clear and do you feel okay about me expressing them?"

"Yes and yes," he responded.

"That's good," she heaved a sigh of relief. "Let's go to sleep now. We can talk more tomorrow if you want, Sweetie."

He kissed her and said "Okay. Good idea."

After another moment of silence she whispered "It was fucking awesome."

Gardner chuckled and replied "Damn straight," and reached for her hand, intertwining it in his.


	3. We Are Inn Love - Saturday

** Saturday **

The pair of lovers slept surprisingly late considering they were both programmed to wake up early most mornings for classes and work and whatnot. Apparently a huge dinner followed by a hot bath and vigorous sex was a formula for a good night's sleep. It was almost ten a.m. when they finally felt ready to dredge themselves up from the murky depths of sleep.

Despite the images conjured in the romance novels she read, in which couples slept tangled in each other's arms, once they started sharing a bed, Flower Girl was disappointed to find that Gardner slept completely independently of her. He wrapped himself in the blanket and slept on his back as stiff as a board or moved to his side and curled up into himself, and never once reached for her all night long. That was just his thing. Even touching him while he slept initially used to set him off and he'd startle out of his sleep, until she had slowly gotten him used to her presence and her touch. She took comfort in the fact that after a few months' conditioning, at least now she could place her hand on his arm or his somewhere else on his body without causing him to flinch.

To compensate, she liked to catch some cuddle time when they woke up, though this wasn't usually possible under normal circumstances because of their busy schedule of classes, Gardner's job, Flower Girl's therapy appointments and study group sessions, and various other commitments that the two of them had. So to have this time together felt like a true luxury.

She nestled her body into Gardner's arms and sighed with deep satisfaction. "Ohhh, this is so yummy to be able to be cuddle monsters, Sweetie."

He let his fingers comb through her messy copper tresses and trace down to the mark he had left on her neck the night before. His forefinger drew a circle around the dark red bruise that had fully bloomed and he bent to examine it more closely, then kissed it lightly with dry lips.

"That's quite a statement you had me make on you last night," he observed.

"I didn't really look at it closely. Is it very noticeable?"

He shrugged. "Not unless you're really looking for it."

She said "Oh well. I'll know it's there. I kind of just wanted to go a bit crazy and swing from the rafters last night, you know?"

He said "Yeah, I get it. At the time I didn't really understand what was happening. I thought you were trying to be someone you aren't, but I think what you were saying to me is that there's more to you than I realized and that that _is_ who you are."

She snuggled closer to him and kissed him deeply, then peered up at him. "That's exactly what I was telling you. I was letting you inside myself more. In fact, I think I was discovering myself a little more right along with you. We both met a new side of me last night. Is that okay with you?"

Gardner ran his fingers over her cheek and lips delicately, as if acquainting himself with them anew, nodded and said "It's more than okay with me. I want to watch you grow and support you while it happens and hopefully receive the same support back from you and grow more myself. I know we're young and that we'll both develop and change as life goes on. I've told you I want to live my life with you, Flower. I don't expect that we're going to stay the same as time goes by, particularly you – you're not even twenty-one years old yet!"

Her lips quirked up. "You don't think of me as jailbait, do you, old man?"

"Of course I don't," he said and firmly kissed her grinning rosy lips. "If anything, some of your more unfortunate lived experiences have given you an amount of maturity that some women many years older than you don't have. You're what I'd call an old soul. I feel like in many ways, I'm the one who lacks maturity. Like my growth got stunted because of the way I was raised and the fact that my parents bailed out on me when I was sixteen. I had to kind of figure things out on my own and I'm still trying to figure things out, particularly when it comes to relationships with women."

She slid her hands up Gardner's chest and planted them there firmly, as if to ground him in reality and bind their physical and spiritual essences together. "You're doing really well, if you ask me, Sweetie. I know I call you my Baby Boy, but that's just because you have such a pure, innocent, sweet nature. You are _all_ man when it comes to loving me the way I want and need to be loved."

She raised her lips to his with a silent request which he answered with a passionate kiss. She buried her fingers in his wild, messy bedhead hair as he drew her in closer to him, tangling their legs in the high thread count sheets the inn had provided to them. Before things got too heated, however, Gardner applied the brakes.

"We should put this on pause for later. I have our day all planned out for us. Is that okay?"

Flower Girl giggled as she watched Gardner reach down and adjust his hard-on inside his sleep shorts. "Sure, that's okay with me, as long as you don't mind having a case of blue balls."

Gardner sassed back "Before I met you, I had had a case of blue balls that was basically lifelong. I'm sure I can cool down and make it through the day until we get back from our activities."

She snorted with amusement and said "Okay, but I am going to need to change my bottoms, I must admit. I'm a wee bit moist down south. We will reconvene this little makeout sesh later, yeah?"

"You can count on it, baby."

Over breakfast at a cute little café, Gardner revealed his plan for the first part of the day. He waited until Flower Girl had finished eating and was sipping the rest of her cup of tea, so as not to ruin her appetite. He knew what he was going to ask her to do was going to challenge her boundaries.

"So are you ready to hear about our first activity?"

She nodded. "Yep. Now that you've fed me a high-cholesterol breakfast and deprived me of sex, I'm ready to rock and roll," she joked.

Gardner pursed his lips and gave her a scolding look. "It's amazing the filthy things you can do with that mouth without even trying," he said.

Without missing a beat she retorted "Fuck around and find out, babycakes."

He snorted. "Okay, but let's do some stuff first. Damn, you are sassy! I gotta take you on a road trip more often!"

She giggled and gestured with her teacup for him to continue. "Just givin' you the blues, Sweetie. Tell me your grand plan for today."

He said "Well, Gruene has a historic district, so I thought we could mosey around and have a look at that for a bit, and then, like I mentioned, I want to take you to an artists' market called The Old Gruene Market. It's kind of like an arts and crafts fair that they have every month and artisans from all over, but particularly locally, come and sell their wares. They've got art, jewelry, woodwork, food, all sorts of cool stuff. Do you think you could manage that for a bit?"

Flower Girl nibbled on her thumbnail and gave it some thought. She always avoided activities that included unfettered hordes of people roaming around making noise at high decibel levels because of her agoraphobia and panic disorder. But the chance to see a bunch of cool handmade items was tempting, particularly because she was in the market for a birthday present for her mom. She decided that the altruistic angle of buying a gift for someone else would be the factor that would urge her over the hump and get her to go for it.

"Okay, I'll do it. I need to find something good for my mom's birthday. She's so hard to shop for because I need something really unique for her. She doesn't like things that anyone else might have and she's really picky. If I buy her something at a normal store, most likely she'll thank me for it and then it will just sit around and never get used."

Gardner threw his arms up in victorious triumph. "Great! That's your motivation, then! You're on mission buy-mom-a-present! And we don't have to stay any longer than you feel comfortable. I just thought it would be fun and a good way to get you to push yourself a little further with your agoraphobia, like your therapist wants you to do."

She tried to manage a smile and attempted to look brave, but it came off more like a tentative grimace. Still, she had made up her mind and committed to the mission and would give it a go. She trusted Gardner to know how to take care of her if it all went pear-shaped and turned to shit.

Gardner reached across the table and took her hands in his. "Don't worry, Flower. I won't let you fall. I'll look after you." He gave her hands a squeeze until she squeezed his hands back in acknowledgement. She took a few deep cleansing breaths and then stood up from the table.

"I'm okay. I'll just go use the ladies room while you pay the check." As she made her way to the bathroom, she felt her knees go a bit wobbly and she murmured to herself one of her calming mantras. "You're okay, Leah, you're okay. You're okay, Leah, you're okay." By the time she returned to the table, Flower Girl was able to return Gardner's hopeful, beaming, optimistic gaze with some form of vicarious optimism of her own, feeding off of his positive vibes. He had a sort of fake-it-till-you-make it type of influence on her, giving her courage to do things she normally couldn't do, because since the first day he had met her, he had provided her with his unconditional acceptance as well as his unflagging support, plus he always guaranteed her a quick egress through the chicken exit, like the one they had next to roller coaster rides for those who lost their nerve. Indeed, their first encounter had been in the midst of one of her panic attacks.

"Are you ready to stroll around town for a bit?" he asked.

"Can we save that for another day?" she countered. "I'd rather go ahead and get going to the market now that I know that's ahead of us. You know, go ahead and meet my fate," she said, squaring her shoulders and breathing in heavily through her nostrils.

He looked at her doubtfully. "You look more like you're meeting your doom, Flower. It's not going to be like that, but if you've already got that mindset, maybe we should skip it," he offered, giving her a smile to let her know all the options were hers and he was not bothered by her negative emotions and resistance.

"No, no, you may be onto something. I don't want to miss out on something good just because an irrational part of my brain is telling me lies," she protested. "I've always said there's not a single rational thing about agoraphobia. Any more than you being afraid of heights."

"Hey now!" he protested. "Being afraid of heights is extremely rational. It's your brain telling you something sensible, which is to step away from the ledge!"

She snorted. "Sweetie, the guy was what, three flights up when he looked down the staircase?!" She was referring to the movie _Vertigo_ , Alfred Hitchcock's masterpiece starring Jimmy Stewart, which they had seen during the beginning of their courtship at a Hitchcock film festival. During the movie, Gardner had confessed his affinity with Stewart's fear of heights and Flower Girl had ribbed him about it ever since. She felt reassured to know that she was not the only one in their relationship to harbor a phobia, and felt a sense of smug superiority because she did not fear heights.

"Well, it looked a lot steeper than that. You know, camera tricks and such," Gardner speculated.

Flower Girl joked "So if I were Juliette, I guess you wouldn't climb up to my balcony, eh?"

Gardner paled at the thought. "Well, I'd probably just find a different way to woo you."

She batted her eyelashes at him dramatically. "How would you go about it, my lord?"

He took her hand in his, kissed it and replied "I'd take you for a ride in a boat on the river and read you poetry."

"That actually was pretty effective, I must say," she mused. "It was a beautiful Valentine's Day celebration you arranged for me. Good thing you're not afraid of water," she joked and poked his cheek.

He laughed and pulled her up. "Okay, okay. Everyone has their thing. Crowds are yours, heights are mine. Someday, if I ever have the money, I'll take you to Paris and we can go to the top of the Eiffel Tower. How's that for romance?"

She looked into his eyes to see if he was joshing her or actually serious. "Do you mean that or are you just trying to get me to go to this market?"

He pulled her in close until his breath tickled and warmed her neck and looked deeply into her eyes. "I would leap tall buildings for you, Flower, to demonstrate my love for you, and to match the bravery you display every day just to live your life." He gave her one firm kiss and then led her out of the restaurant. Semi-dazed by his words and kiss, she followed him silently, contemplating his heady influence over her to want to be her best self and to enjoy life to the utmost.

The parking lot to the market was already full, so they had to park some distance away and walk there. This did not inspire confidence in Flower Girl that the crowds would be manageable and Gardner sensed her unease, so he threaded his fingers through hers and coached her gently. "You've got this, Flower. Just give it a chance."

She kept her eyes trained on the ground and let him steer her in the correct direction so that she didn't have to absorb the sight of the crowds or truly comprehend their mass. This was their usual method of navigating public spaces and she mentally schooled herself to imagine that this place was no different than any other place they had already successfully visited. "You're okay, Leah, you're okay, you're okay, you're okay," she mumbled to herself under her breath.

Gardner attempted to distract her by enticing her with his previous bribe. "Don't forget, I'm staking you to a hundred dollars to spend on whatever you want. That's in exchange for driving lessons. So if you see something you like, just holler and we'll get it for you."

Flower Girl shivered and grimaced. "That's always assuming that I can raise my eyes up from the ground, Gardner."

Her use of his real name and not his nickname tipped him off that her frame of mind was serious and trending negative. He changed course and steered them over towards a patch of ground where there were few people and mostly empty picnic tables. "Let's take a minute and get you centered, okay?"

She let him bring her over to an empty table and sit her down with her back to the table and her legs sprawled in front of her. He sat next to her and held her hand. She was gripping it tightly, almost desperately, so he took his other hand and pried her fingers loose for a moment, then re-settled them in his hand and interlaced their fingers again in a less fraught manner. This seemed to call Flower Girl back to the present moment and make her aware of the death grip she was trying to exercise over not just his hand but the whole situation, and she finally looked up at him sheepishly and gave him a small embarrassed smile.

He patted her knee and reassured her "Hey, it's okay. Let's just take a minute and cool our jets. There's no hurry. Let's get the lay of the land and figure out what's what. Okay?"

She nodded her head silently and took a deep, cleansing breath. Over the course of the next several minutes, Gardner began calling to her attention the small details of their surroundings, commenting on them and asking her for her opinion on them or soliciting her observations. He was basically orienting her to the market and her situation without making her wade into it. It was akin to allowing a beginning swimmer to cling to the side of the pool while wearing floaties on their arms. He knew not to throw her into the deep end, or to dunk her under the surface of the water. First he had to get her used to the depth of the pool, its temperature, the other swimmers and any other confounding factors that might make swimming a challenge.

Finally, when her breathing had leveled out and her sense of humor had made its appearance in their chit chat, Gardner inquired "Do you feel ready to check out some of the stalls now?"

She took another deep breath and said "Yeah, I think I'm ready for takeoff, captain. Thanks for helping me run through my system checks."

"No problem, Flower. There's no rule that says we have to hurl ourselves into any situation. We can do things at our own pace. There's really something to be said for living mindfully. You've opened my eyes to that."

She cackled "Well I'm glad to know that my craziness has some redeeming value."

"Indeed it does, my girl. And it's not craziness, it's idiosyncrasy. I thought we agreed on no negative self-talk for either of us."

A look of guilt overtook her momentarily. "You're right. I need to walk my talk." She was conscious of the fact that Gardner himself had some serious quirks and remnants, and recalled that there had been many a time when it was she who had had to scrape him up off the ground and offer him a pep talk. "I can't expect less fortitude and perseverance from myself than I hope you can summon for yourself."

Gardner ran his fingers through her hair gently. "Hey, Girlie. It's not a competition, we have a mutual support pact. But hopefully we spur each other on and inspire each other to be braver than we think we are."

"You're right," she sighed. "Okay, I think I'm good to go. Let's do this." She stood up somewhat shakily from the bench and smoothed out her floral sundress, a staple in her wardrobe.

Gardner eyed her, considering whether she was merely humoring him or was all in for this adventure. He decided to remind her that she always had an out. "Don't forget, Flower, if you get uncomfortable and you need to leave, just say something, or use your safe word – flowers."

She nodded and took a deep breath, then squeezed his hand in hers and gave him a tentative smile. They approached the artisans' booths with Gardner firmly gripping Flower Girl's hand. He could hear her breathing in and out puffs of air, struggling to try to regulate her breathing. He began squeezing her hand with each breath, attempting to slow her respiration down. She smiled at him and took his cue, making her inhales and exhales match his prompts.

To distract her, Gardner called her attention to all of the intricately crafted items that were arrayed before them. There were items made from carved wood, large rope macramé creations, knitted garments and accessories in a rainbow of colors, paintings in oils and watercolors, and sculptures made from wire, bronze, and even junk and repurposed household items. The booths were also interspersed with edible artisanal products, like salsa, cheese and baked goods, and they munched on free samples.

Flower Girl's attention was drawn primarily to the feminine items that she thought might suit her mother, so they spent a lot of time looking at jewelry. While she was pawing through a stall that was offering accessories made from hand-blown glass, Gardner asked her if it would be okay if he stepped away for a moment to visit a stall he wanted to check out without her and she nodded absentmindedly.

Gardner sprinted over to a table where they were selling silver rings with large resin flowers attached to them. They came in the whole rainbow of colors, but Gardner decided to choose the color Flower Girl seemed to wear the most, which was pink. Even so, there were several hues of pink to choose from, so he selected a dusky pink, remembering the color of the bra she wore the first time he undressed her on her first visit to his boat. His cheeks turned almost the same color as he recalled the delightful memory. 

With the ring in a small velvet bag tucked in his pocket, he returned to join Flower Girl back at the jewelry stall. He hung back for a moment, noting with pride as he watched her chit chatting with the woman behind the checkout table as they talked about the jewelry. Clearly she was the creator of the jewelry Flower Girl had purchased and they were deep in conversation. Finally, Gardner decided to join them. He approached them and cleared his throat to announce his presence so as not to startle his girl, then put his arm around her once she had spotted him and shone a glimmering smile at him.

"How'd you make out, did you find something for your mom?" he asked.

"Oh, yes, I found lots of things she'd like! In fact, it was hard to whittle it down to just one item. This is Anne Godwin, she's an incredible artist," she gestured at the woman sitting on a stool behind a table with a cash box. The woman nodded at Gardner and beamed at the compliment.

"Hi, Anne," he said and offered her his hand to shake. "I'm so glad you had something perfect for my girlfriend's mom. That is a tall order because apparently she's really hard to shop for."

Anne chuckled and said "Well that's why it's a good idea to support artists and skip the mall. You'll find something special that nobody else has. You tell your mom she's got something one-of-a-kind and it will make it even more precious for her."

Flower Girl said "I definitely intend to do that. She's something of a snob, and she likes to one-up her girlfriends. She likes to be original and doesn't really roll with the crowd."

Gardner said "Aside from the snobby part, I think you're kind of like your mother. You're kind of a one-off yourself."

Flower Girl said "Well, my mom was a good power of example to me in that regard. And let's face it, I don't meet traditional standards of beauty, so I need to blaze my own trail."

Anne reached across her table and took hold of Flower Girl's hand, her brows furrowed and mouth set in a serious mien. "I hope you'll always be you and nobody else. There's no glory nor satisfaction in trying to fit in or conform. Being unique and making the most of what God gave you is a great gift. All the most beautiful women in the world, all the most accomplished women in the world, have made the most of what they had and marched to their own beat. Be you, darlin'. Don't be anybody else but you."

She and Flower Girl stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, joined by their hands, and then Flower Girl said "Thank you. I'll keep that in mind. I appreciate hearing your wisdom on that."

Anne shrugged. "I just call it like I see it. Lots of people come and go on any given day, but very few stop to actually talk to me, and even fewer leave an impression on me. You're special. You really are. So you already got a head start. You can see it, can't you?" she asked Gardner.

He nodded vociferously. "Yes, from the first moment I met her. I knew she was somebody very special. Inside and out." He pulled her in for a hug and kissed her on the cheek.

As they walked away from Anne's booth, Gardner said "Well that seemed to go really well for you. You were able to shop, be left alone, and even had a meaningful chat with that lady. That's a lot to accomplish considering a half hour ago you were hyperventilating on a bench outside."

Flower Girl smiled and nodded. "Yeah, it's kind of amazing, but once I get going, I'm okay. It's the anticipation that's the worst. My shrink says that's the worst part of agoraphobia – the anticipation, and that the thing with anticipation is that 95% of what I fear is going to happen almost never does. The other thing that really helps me is that if I can just focus on what's in front of me and maybe get into a conversation with one person, I can block out the rest of what's swirling around me."

"So that's what turns you into a gregarious Chatty Cathy?" Gardner asked, amused at the swift transformation.

Flower Girl shrugged her shoulders sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess so. Call me a gregarious agoraphobe. I'm not shy, I'm just looney. So my coping mechanism is to outtalk the voices in my head that tell me to be scared."

Gardner laughed. "That's so brave of you. That is some serious ninja skill you're applying."

Gardner gazed around and noted that there were many more aisles of booths that they had not visited. He said "Well, there's still a lot here for us to see, and I did offer you $100 to spend on yourself in exchange for teaching me to drive. Want to see if there's anything you'd like to buy yourself?"

Flower Girl shook her head no. "I don't think I'm up for it. I'd like to leave now while I feel like I came, I saw and I kicked ass. If I stay longer, I might descend into madness. How about if you just buy me a present as a thank you at some point?"

Gardner shrugged and said "Whoa! You are breaking all stereotypes. A woman who doesn't want to shop and is turning down free money. Okay, I am not going to argue with that."

Flower Girl gave him a mock frown and rolled her eyes. "Don't get used to it, babe. You just caught me today when I was on my last nerve."

They drove back into the town of Gruene and had lunch at a restaurant called The Gristmill. They decided to stick to appetizers. They shared an order of sloppy, yummy, cheesy queso and tortilla chips, spinach and mushroom quesadillas, and an order of Polish Wedding Sausage, which Gardner insisted on getting because he said he needed his thrice daily infusion of cholesterol-laden, iron-infused protein. Flower Girl just giggled and didn't fight him on it.

After they demolished their food, Gardner asked "Should we look at the dessert menu?"

Flower Girl shook her head. "No, let's hold off. I saw a general store with people sitting outside eating ice cream on our way over here, so I think we should check that out instead."

Gardner grinned and took her hands in his. "I like how even though ninety-nine percent of the time, you've got your eyes glued to the ground, the one time you're paying attention, you spot what's important."

She laughed and said "I'll try to take that as a compliment."

"Oh it is, baby, it most definitely is," he reassured her as he kissed each of her palms.

In addition to containing an ice cream counter, the General Store turned out to be an Aladdin's Cave of treasures. After securing a mint chocolate chip ice cream cone for Flower Girl and a pecan praline cone for Gardner, they meandered around aisles of merchandise both practical and fanciful. There was a case displaying dozens of types of homemade fudge ("Ooooh, I need to get me some of that to take home!" Flower Girl cried."), a display piled high with various types of hot sauce which Gardner found beguiling, tacky souvenirs, and cowboy hats. There were all manner of gourmet foods that Gardner thought would make his brother Calvin's toes twinkle so he started grabbing a selection to bring back to him, knowing that ultimately he'd be the beneficiary because Calvin cooked for them both.

They strolled around town licking their ice cream cones, exploring and window shopping. As they passed a women's consignment clothing shop, Gardner spotted a sweater on a mannequin in the window that pulled him up short and he immediately grabbed Flower Girl's hand and steered her into the shop.

"What are we doing in here, Gardner?" she asked.

"I'm getting you a present," he said.

"Oh, well, that's okay with me I guess, but if it's something to wear, let's make sure I like it."

He looked around for an assistant who could help them and flagged one over. "Can my girlfriend try on that sweater in the window?"

The woman smiled at the novelty of a man steering the purchase instead of his female companion. Then she took a closer look at Flower Girl, eyed her buxom frame and gave her a doubtful look. "I'm not sure if it will fit you, Dearie," she speculated and clicked her tongue with disapproval.

Gardner said in an assertive tone that surprised himself "Please bring it here for her to try on."

Flower Girl looked and felt like she'd like to disappear into a hole in the ground. She blushed and squirmed. "Gardner, I don't know about this, maybe she's right..."

Gardner kissed her cheek and said "Hush. It's going to look wonderful on you. I just know it."

The saleslady returned and unfurled the sweater, causing Flower Girl to gasp at its overwhelming brilliance. The long-sleeved sweater was covered in a rainbow of wide stripes. It had a giant applique of a tiger in sequins on the center of the chest, and the word LOVED in felt stitched below. The tiger's face winked and sparkled in the shop's spotlights and seemed almost to be animated.

Gesturing towards an area concealed by a curtain the saleslady said "You can go try it on over there, Dearie."

Gardner steered Flower Girl into the changing area and joined her behind the curtain. She giggled "What are you doing, Sweetie? This is just for women, I'm sure."

Gardner said "I'm making sure that you actually try it on and don't try to get out of letting me buy this for you because you let that nasty woman shoot down your confidence."

Flower Girl blushed and toed the ground. "You know me pretty well these days. I can't get much by you anymore, can I?"

"Yep. I also know that you're going to look at the designer label and think it's too posh for you, or the price tag and think I shouldn't spend money on you, even though this is a secondhand store and it's marked down to a ridiculously low price."

Again Flower Girl looked like she had gotten caught out. "Yep, guilty as charged." She examined the sweater more carefully and stuck her pinky finger through a tiny hole near the back of the neck band. "I think I see why it's so cheap. Looks like some rich snooty lady had moths in her house. I guess they really like the taste of Gucci!" she giggled. "It is quite pricey, but for what it is, it's kind of a steal."

"So let me help you take off what you're wearing so you can try on this lovely sweater and I'll be the judge of whether it fits you well and suits you, and about how much money I'm willing to spend on you, okay? And then you'll give me the go ahead if you're okay with it. Deal?"

She nodded her head in agreement. "Okay, deal. I guess I can't resist a little foreplay while I shop," she joked.

She let Gardner unbutton the top of her dress and she slid her arms out of it, then pulled the crewneck sweater over her head. It was form-fitting, but not tight under the armpits or shoulders, and her arms didn't feel like sausages. It seemed to be constructed from jersey wool that had some ease to it and while it hugged her figure, it didn't grip it too tightly.

She turned to examine herself in the mirror as Gardner stood behind her. 

"What do you see?" she asked him.

He paused a few beats as he gazed at her lovingly, admiring her curves which always sent his senses reeling. "I see a voluptuous, gorgeous woman wearing a piece of clothing that exudes pure joy and advertises exactly how I feel about her." He wrapped his arms around her waist and asked "What do _you_ see, Goddess?"

She looked at herself appraisingly, somewhat doubtfully. "I see something that says 'Pay attention to me,' which I generally don't want, and I see something that shows you exactly what I have on offer." She gestured towards her breasts. "Is that bad? Does that make me slutty?"

Gardner frowned and said "No, it doesn't make you slutty! For god's sake, you're covered from neck to wrist in wool! It says 'Here I am, I'm beautiful, and if you don't like it, you can suck it!' How can that be bad?"

Flower Girl laughed. "I guess you're right. I just still have a lot of the negative voices in my head left over from my last relationship plus my Mom haranguing me about my body that I'm working on banishing. I guess I didn't realize how they had affected my own self-esteem. I guess I'm not used to being a force to be reckoned with. I always wear things that are kind of non-threatening and sort of gentle."

Gardner said "Hey, nothing wrong with that. I love how you dress. And you don't have to get this sweater. I just thought it would look nice on you and it was sort of my way of letting you and the world know how I feel about you."

Flower Girl turned around and threaded her arms around Gardner's neck. "I like that. I did ask you to claim me. This sweater definitely does that."

Gardner smirked "It's much less messy than a hickey, and it lasts longer."

She laughed and smacked his shoulder. "Oh, you! Okay, I'm convinced. I'll let you buy me the sweater. And this can be the exchange for the driving lessons, since it's so expensive. I'll put my hundred dollars towards it. I can't really think of anything else I want or need anyway."

Gardner said "Okay, it's a deal. Let's go show that snooty saleslady how beautifully it fits you."

Flower Girl arrested his progress guiding her towards the curtain. "No, let's not. I don't need to poke the bear. You've convinced me that that woman's opinion doesn't matter, so let's leave it lie."

Gardner said "Okay. Fair enough. But I'm going to go out there now and tell her how great it looks on you. I reserve the right to brag on you to anyone at any time, okay?"

Flower Girl gave him a pat on his bum and said "If you insist. Now git – I need to change out of this and put my dress back on."

When Flower Girl reached the till to have her sweater rung up, she could hear Gardner still rhapsodizing about how great his girlfriend looked in the sweater and gently scolding the saleslady for not being more encouraging to customers. The woman looked embarrassed and contrite and Flower Girl began to feel sorry for her.

"Don't mind my boyfriend. He's just super-protective of me. It's alright."

The saleslady said "I'm glad it ended up suiting you so well. I'd like to offer you a thank you for your purchase. Do you wear hats?"

Flower Girl said "Yes, I do. I wear a straw hat with flowers quite often."

"Well here. Choose one of these hat pins that I've crafted. They're meant to look like they're vintage." She held out a fabric-covered mannequin head from which a dozen hat pins strung with beads and ornate jewelry findings were protruding.

"Oh, these are truly lovely! You made these yourself? You're very talented!"

The lady's cheeks warmed to a rosy pink and she gave a look of gratification. "Yes, I love to work with beads and I also make jewelry. Please, pick one out, for free."

"That's very generous of you," Flower Girl said. She took a moment to survey the array of stick pins and opted for one with pink and green beads. "Thank you for this. I think I'll wear it now," and she slipped the finding off the end and attached it to the breast of her dress.

The lady looked pleased at Flower Girl's instant appreciation of her jewelry. "Oh, that's another clever way to use the hat pin, young lady. Well I hope you enjoy it. And the sweater, I hope you enjoy that, too." She handed her a shopping bag with the sweater wrapped in tissue paper.

Flower Girl said "Thank you, I think I shall, and I get the feeling that my boyfriend _definitely_ will." The saleslady blushed, and Gardner chuckled knowingly and winked at her. They waved goodbye and left the shop.

Back out into the sunlight, Gardner said "Okay, what now?"

Flower Girl took a deep breath and sighed. "I think I'm tapped out. Can we go back to the hotel and not leave it again?"

Gardner pursed his lips and furrowed his brows in thought. "Hmm, that sounds great, but what will we do about dinner?"

Flower Girl said "Oh, I'm so full from everything we've eaten so far today. Can't we just pick up a few things to nosh on and bring them back to the room with us? We could have a picnic in our room."

Gardner said "That's a great idea! Let's see what we can forage for around here."

They couldn't find any stores with food for sale nearby, but they did pop back in to the Gristmill and found out that the restaurant provided delivery, so they took a copy of their menu with them and decided were all set and headed back to their hotel. Flower Girl wanted another crack at one of those rocking chairs on the porch and Gardner decided to wander around the grounds of the hotel property. Eventually he ambled back to her and joined her in the chair beside her. He fished his journal out of the bag she had brought down to the porch and noodled around with a poem he had been working on.

Sooner than they would have liked, the sun descended, leaving them in the dim porch lights. Gardner said "Shall we go up to the room? We're paying a lot for it, may as well make the most of it."

Flower Girl retorted "Okay, if that's your cover story, I'll let it slide."

Gardner gave her a lascivious grin and let his fingers walk up her arm until he had reached the vicinity of her breast, then gave a gentle squeeze. "Yep, Officer, that's my alibi and I'm sticking to it."

When they were back in the room, Flower turned on the lamp beside the bed and then gazed expectantly at Gardner, wondering what he had in mind for her. Her heart was beating faster than usual and the place between her thighs thrummed in anticipation. Gardner was standing on the other side of the bed, gazing at her like she was his next meal and he was deciding which morsel to start with – the leg or the breast.

His eyes drifted over to the nightstand, where two bottles of wine stood. He said "I'm remembering you said you wanted to sample this wine. Should we wait until we're having dinner, or crack open a bottle now?"

Flower Girl shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not fussy. I know you're not a big drinker, so you won't have much anyway. It might be fun to get a little tipsy now, though, wouldn't it?" She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively to him.

He replied "It does sound a bit decadent and naughty, especially as you are looking particularly edible at this moment. Let's go for it." He reached for the corkscrew and asked "Red or white?"

She said "Definitely red. White doesn't taste good unless it's chilled. We can get a bucket of ice or something when we want to drink that one."

Gardner grabbed the bottle of red wine and poured out each of them a glass. He passed one to Flower Girl, who accepted it, kicked off her shoes and then sank down onto the bed. He did likewise and they both scooted next to each other and entangled their legs together as they sat against the headboard.

Flower Girl raised her glass in a toast. "To your weekend getaway gift. I so appreciate that you are such romantic boy."

Gardner's lips twitched in a gratified smile and his cheeks pinked up in delight. "You make me want to give you the world, Flower, but for now this is what I can manage."

Flower Girl said "This _is_ the world to me. It means everything to me." She offered her lips to him and he feasted on them. Then they clinked glasses, sampled the wine and voiced their approval of the vintage. For a few minutes, they sat in companionable silence as they sipped and contemplated the day and their situation.

As they sipped on their wine, they began to discuss topics that they didn't usually touch on in their normal everyday life. They shared stories from their pasts and how they colored their present attitudes. They each had come into the relationship toting some heavy baggage, both psychological and emotional, and it seemed like the time that they were most open to discussing it was when they had some liquid courage in them. Moreover, the quiet and focused space of the one-on-one time they created when they were having date nights or in this case, a date weekend, made such intimate talk more conducive. They also talked in greater depth about their feelings for each other, enumerating what qualities they prized and valued in one another.

Eventually, Gardner took the now-empty wine bottle from her hand and said "I think we killed that bottle, didn't we?"

Flower Girl peered into it with one eye open and one eye squinted shut and said "Mmmm, yep, I guess we did. I'm surprised at how much you drank." She gave a drunken giggle and said "Now what do you want to do? Are you hungry?"

Gardner growled "Yes. Hungry for you."

She giggled tipsily. "That's quite the chat-up line you have there, Mister."

He moved his face within millimeters of her neck and breathed in the scent of her lilac perfume. "Is it going to work?" he asked and let his breath warm her skin without actually touching her, causing her to shiver and tremble a bit. Her hands flew to his neck and drew his head in completing the contact between them. He began to nuzzle her neck with his long nose with the dimple at the end (she loved and adored that distinctive dimple, which Gardner had finally confided to her matched the one his father had). Shivering with his teasingly light touch, she pulled him in closer until he granted her relief with his lips.

"You want another mark of my love for you, Girlie?"

"Yessss," she hissed as he began to lick and suck at her neck.

After a couple of minutes, Gardner leaned back to examine his handy work. "Oh, I think you're going to be pleased with this one. It's a pretty shade of reddish purple. Not too big, just big enough for you to know it's there."

Flower Girl giggled. "I've turned you into a hickey connoisseur."

"Should I put that on my résumé when I apply for my next job?" he joked.

"Better not," she advised.

Gardner let his fingers roam over Flower Girl's shoulders and chest. "Hmmm, I wonder where I can plant another one of those on you..."

She was wearing a sundress with tiny buttons down the front. One by one he began to undo them. He treated her chest with the same teasing care that he had her neck, until she had become a squirming mess in his hands. Once again, she was pressing him towards her flesh, silently requesting more contact, more mouth and tongue, more everything. He let his beard stubble lightly scrape and tickle the surface of her skin, knowing this was one of her major kinks, and watched her twitch with bliss.

"Gardner, you know where I want that beard stubble, and it's not hitting the right spots, if you take my meaning," she scolded in a mockingly stern voice.

Gardner teased her. "I don't take your meaning, Flower. Tell me what you want. Tell me exactly how you want me to give you pleasure. You said you were going to be more in charge of your own fate in these matters, so I will await your command."

Flower sighed as if she was somewhat regretting that she had opened her big mouth the night before, but she resigned herself to carrying through what she had committed to in a rare moment of candor. "Okay, that's fair. Sweetie, please take off my clothes and rub your stubble on my most sensitive places, starting with my breasts."

Gardner said cheerfully "See, that wasn't hard at all! I can totally do that." He started to shove her dress off down her hips and over her legs, then took a moment to admire her sitting on the bed in her underwear as a smile played on his lips. Then he requested "I want to see you take the rest of your clothes off. Will you do that for me?"

Flower Girl nodded and reached behind her ribs and undid the clasp on her bra. Her breasts sprang free from their confines and spilled out as she slid the straps of her bra down her arms. Gardner took them in both hands and frenziedly rubbed his face over them, eliciting giggles that quickly turned into moans when he applied his stubble to her nipples vigorously. Soon she was huffing and puffing and squirming so much he had to use his hands to hold her in place.

He decided to suck love bites on each of her breasts, concentrating on the flesh that protruded to the side next to each arm. He eased her down on the bed and Flower Girl watched in wonder and glee as he created one on each side. Gardner gently traced the marks with his fingers, then kissed each one gently and sat back up with a big grin on his face.

Flower Girl met his smile with a radiant one of her own. She lifted her flesh and twisted to look down at the hickeys, then let her fingers stray over to her nipples. She placed her thumb and forefinger over them forming a bullseye for Gardner to aim for and he took the hint, aiming his tongue for the middle of the rosy nubs she was squeezing and pointing at him.

She gasped and remarked "Oh! They're so much more sensitive this way, with me holding them for you." Gardner shot her a look of intrigued interest but did not comment. He merely carried on with his task of teasing her nipples into hard, stiff peaks. He rubbed his whiskers over her nipples again, this time bracketed by her own fingers, and she moaned with fervor with every swipe of his face over her darkening areolas. At first, she was helping guide his movements by running her hand through his hair, but eventually, in her bliss, her hands fell away and she reached for the coverlet beneath her to give her ballast to ground her as she floated in sexual exhilaration.

Gardner's favorite snack, meal and feast was Flower Girl's breasts. He felt he could spend hours lavishing them with attention if given the opportunity. But Flower Girl was now squirming and bucking her hips, a sure sign that she wanted other areas of her body to get fair play, so he took the hint and continued down her torso, placing open-mouthed kisses on her soft, pliant skin as he descended to her other erogenous zone. When he got there, he peeled off her underwear and trailed a long finger through her glistening juices, smiling at the positive response he had elicited from her body.

"I'm going to make you feel so good, Girlie," he said. He looked up to see that Flower Girl was fingering her nipples and grinning at him, with a glazed look in her eyes that signaled she was in a state of heightened bliss. Her lack of inhibition in touching herself surprised, titillated and amused him. "Correction, I guess _we're_ going to make you feel so good..."

"Mhmmm," she purred, as she gave her nipples a hard tweak and hissed with pleasure.

He took her by the ankles and lifted them over his shoulders, which seemed to take her by surprise and she gasped "Ohhh!" with astonishment but also pleasure. Then he dove down between her legs and lapped at her vulva with considerable energy. He occasionally alternated licking with plunging his tongue into her opening, which forced cries of satisfaction from her lips. But he knew that his moneymaker would be the suction he was going to apply to her clitoris, which he then began to employ in earnest.

Clamping down on her love button with his lips and tongue, he sucked and nibbled, alternately tenderly and fiercely, until her breathing sped up, signaling that her climax was nigh. Then he inserted two fingers into her to give her something to bear down on as the waves of her orgasm overtook her and she heaved with its rumbling reverberations. He controlled her body throughout the entire experience and was her guide to pleasure. His lips remained firmly clamped on to her clitoris as she rode wave after wave of her body's release, and his hands held her thighs and calves in place over his shoulders as she bucked and twitched.

When he could feel the vibrations of her climax receding, he gently lowered her limbs back down to the bed and kissed her all the way back up to her face. Still dripping with the juices from her core, he hovered above her blissed-out countenance and smiled. "How are you feeling, my girl?"

"Fucking fantastic, I have to say," she confessed, then giggled as she ran her forefinger through some of her smeared fluids that bestrewed the skin around his mouth. "Let me clean that up for you."

He laughed. "Want to have a taste?"

She smiled and nodded.

He leant down and she began to lap at his mouth and face, cleaning him like a cat grooming its kitten. When she was finished, she pulled him in for a kiss with major tongue and tasted more of herself again.

"That was kind of oddly spiritual," she observed.

Gardner raised an eyebrow as if to ask "How so?"

She continued explaining. "Well, I just mean, last night, we joined our hands inside of me, and tonight, you brought the inside of me to my mouth. It's like we are really becoming one."

Gardner said "It's an interesting notion."

Flower Girl said "I guess all that's left is for me to blow you and give you back a mouthful of your jizz."

Gardner barked with laugher. "Uh, no thanks. I'll pass. I've already gotten a taste of my remnants from you before and all I can say is, I'm grateful I'm not a chick."

Flower Girl chuckled and taunted him. "Coward!"

She looked at his bright, shining eyes and happy smile, and thought to herself _'How I love this man. I would do pretty much anything he asked me to. What a contrast to the horrible, frightening life I had with Tab."_ Out loud she said "Okay, Sweetie. Now it's your turn to get blissed out. How do you want me?"

Gardner smiled mischievously and said "I kind of liked having you with your legs slung over my shoulders just now. That was fun and the view was divine."

She punched out a guffaw and said "Okay, chief. You're in charge now. Take your pleasure how you want it. I'm down for whatever you have in mind."

Flower Girl mentally observed that Gardner's eyes lit up like it was Christmas morning, a thought she found especially poignant given that Gardner had never gotten to celebrate Christmas when he was growing up owing to his parents' screwed up views on religion and parenting. He quickly shimmied out of his clothes and dove back on the bed. She sat up and began to kiss him all over, but he seemed to be in a hurry, so she let him ease her back down on the bed and take over again.

"That's it, Girlie, you just lie back. Think I can coax another orgasm out of you?"

Flower Girl shrugged and said "You can try. Not sure how much gas I have left in the tank."

He laughed and said "Well let's see what I can do about that." He inserted his fingers back inside her and started stroking her G-spot, that rough, tender area behind her pubic bone. Immediately her body tensed up and she began to squirm and pant. This elicited a big smile from Gardner, which made Flower Girl grin in response. This time he used his fingers to stimulate her clitoris, and it wasn't long before she was warning him that she was starting to tingle. He quickly changed course and hoisted her legs up again, and she helped him along by wrapping them around him. He eased himself inside her and multitasked as he both tended to his own pleasure and hers. He pumped in and out of her but waited until he heard the crescendo of her climax before he allowed his own to crest, and they came together, a rare and exquisite occurrence for them that left them both breathless. It wasn't just physical but emotionally satisfying because they were truly in concert with each other.

Spent and sated, Gardner lowered Flower Girl's legs back down again and ran to the bathroom to grab a cloth to clean up some of the mess he had left between her legs and on himself. Then he nestled his body next to hers. He realized he wasn't much of a cuddler when they were sleeping, but he loved to hold her in his arms and pet her after they made love. He had grabbed the extra quilt from the end of the bed and pulled it over them, but it wasn't warm from their body heat yet, and he shivered a bit. Flower Girl curled her body in towards his and rubbed all her limbs over his to warm him.

"Mmmm, you feel so soft and squishy in my arms," he said.

Flower Girl bridled at his choice of words. "Would you care to rephrase that?"

He said "What's wrong with that?"

She huffed "You make me sound roly poly, like I'm the Michelin Man."

His eyes grew wide with surprise and his face transformed into a pitiful hangdog expression of remorse. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I just love how I can take my fingers and knead your flesh and have something substantial to hold and caress. I love your curves and cushions. You know that, right?"

She sighed. "Yes, I suppose you've made that clear, I guess it's just a matter of _me_ coming to terms with them."

He kissed her gently and said "Well please allow me to assure you that everything about your form and figure is absolutely gorgeous and ideal. Why do you think one of my nicknames for you is Goddess?"

She laughed. "I thought it was because you were impressed with my ability to navigate a crowded room without actually looking up and seeing anyone. That's an otherworldly talent."

Gardner rolled his eyes and tweaked her nose. "Come on! That's silly. Though I have to say that is an impressive talent you have."

Suddenly, there was an odd sound coming from Gardner's tummy that made Flower Girl cackle. Through her laughter she said "I guess it's feeding time at the zoo, eh?"

He confessed "Yeah, I guess I worked up an appetite. You wore me out, Girlie. We didn't really eat all that much for lunch. At least by my standards. How about if we call for some dinner?"

She said "Okay, I'm down for it."

They threw on some clothes, had a look at the menu they had taken with them from the Gristmill and called for some dinner to be delivered. They ordered tomatillo chicken, bronze catfish, a side of onion rings, as well as a side of Gruene beans (the name of which made Flower Girl giggle because Gruene is pronounced "green"), and for dessert Jack Daniels pecan pie à la mode

Flower Girl complained "Gardner, this is not exactly going to have me feeling less roly poly when all is said and done."

Gardner said "Hey, what did you say when we got here? You don't have to eat all this food. This is to share and you don't have to be a member of the clean plate club. I just don't want to miss out on any of the local delicacies. I have no expectations for what you are going to eat. I'm not your mom, right?"

"Okay," she agreed. "Thanks for reassuring me. Just don't get mad at me for all this money you're spending. That's my dad's pathology. My mom would get mad about me rejecting her food like it was me rejecting her love and the effort she had made to cook it, and my dad would get mad about the money he spent on food he considered wasted."

Gardner took Flower Girl's hands in his. "I'm not either of your parents, Flower. I'm your boyfriend, and I support however you want to be, and however you want to eat. You can pig out and eat all of it, or you can have a few bites and let that be enough. I'm not keeping track of your portions or counting your calories."

"Thank you, Sweetie. I appreciate that. You know, even though I go to a therapist, this isn't something I've ever discussed with him. You're the first person I've opened up to about it. Except my best friend at home. She knows. But she was sort of my partner in crime so she wasn't any help. She's as messed up as I am, so we fed off each other's fucked up-ed-ness. You're the first 'normie' I've ever been around who I felt I could bounce this off of who didn't judge me."

He said "I'm glad I can be that sounding board for you. For this issue or anything else you have on your mind." He kissed her gently on the lips and enfolded her in his arms. She hugged him back tightly.

Dinner arrived and they both ate off of each of the dishes. Flower Girl decided to eat only until she started feeling full but to stop before she felt uncomfortable. That meant that Gardner ate more of the food than she did. She had only a taste of the dessert because she was not hungry anymore. It was for her a carefree, guilt-free meal, and she felt a sense of relief that they had discussed the terms of engagement beforehand.

After they had cleaned up the mess from their dinner, Flower Girl suggested they take a stroll outside to aid digestion. They walked around the property and peeked in the windows to see if they could make out what the other rooms looked like, until it felt too much like they were being peeping Toms. Eventually they ended up on a bench, where they sat and looked at the night sky for a while.

After Flower Girl had yawned for the fifth time, Gardner suggested they go back to their room and get ready for bed. She didn't fight him on it. When they got back he asked her whether she was going to take a bath or not.

"Yes, I think I would like to take a bath. I'd like to soak and maybe fall asleep in there," she said.

Gardner gave her a pouty face. "Okay, so no hanky panky in the bathtub tonight?"

She shook her head side to side. "No, not tonight, Sweetie. But maybe tomorrow?"

He said "Okay, fair enough. There's plenty of time. You get naked and I'll draw the bath for you." He moved towards the bathroom as Flower Girl smiled at him, thinking what a gentle, generous, thoughtful boyfriend he was, in contrast to her last one. She shivered slightly and banished thoughts of her horrid past, trying to keep her focus on her glorious present.

After she was stripped naked, she decided to grab her current romance novel she was reading and sauntered into the bathroom to see how Gardner was getting on with preparing the bath for her. When he saw her enter his expression became hazy with affection and appreciation for her form, and she blushed a bit at his adulation. He held out his hand to her to assist her into the tub. She gratefully took it and stepped into the steaming water, which was still in the process of filling the tub.

"Now you just lie back and turn off the water when it gets high enough to suit you, Flower. I didn't know if you wanted bubbles, but I left them there so you could reach them." He bent down and gave her a soft, lingering kiss, then turned to leave her alone. He asked "Do you want the door open or closed?"

She said "You can leave it open. I don't want to be shut away from you."

He smiled fondly at her and nodded. He bent down and kissed her once more, then turned and left. She shivered to herself again, counting her blessings, chief among them having this loving, tender man in her life who was so committed to her happiness and comfort.

A half hour later, Gardner poked his head into the bathroom to check on Flower Girl. She had indeed fallen asleep. Her paperback romance novel had slipped to the floor and she was lightly dozing in the tub. She was making a light snuffling noise and her eyelashes were fluttering, as if she was in REM sleep, dreaming of something that was engaging her brain enough to keep her at least lightly unconscious.

He ran his fingers gently over her face and cooed softly so as not to startle her "Flower, time to wake up so you can go to sleep."

She stirred and fluttered her eyes open. She murmured "Wow, I've never fallen asleep in a bathtub before. I guess between the wine, the sex, the food coma and this beautiful tub, I just drifted away."

Gardner observed "Sounds like a formula for seductive bliss to me."

Flower smiled at him and reached a damp, pruney finger up to his cheek and stroked it. "Sure is. You've really given me such a gift in taking me away this weekend. It's such a departure from our normal lives. I can't thank you enough."

"You're most welcome, my girl. You deserve all the good things I can provide for you. They won't all be as materially rich as this, but I'll always strive to make your life comfortable and happy."

She gazed lovingly at him and tears sprang to her eyes. "I know. Since the first moment I met you, that very first moment, my comfort and well-being has always been foremost in your mind. That's why I fell in love with you. But it is really nice to know that every once in a while you can be a total romantic and pry open your wallet." She winked at him saucily.

He took her hands in his and helped her out of the tub, admiring her naked body as the water poured from her luscious curves. He reached for a towel and wrapped it around her, smoothing and rubbing it against her skin.

While Flower Girl changed into her pajamas, Gardner took a quick shower to cleanse off the grunge of the day's activities. She was already tucked up in bed and he quickly changed into his own sleep clothes. He got into bed and settled in next to her and turned off the lights.

As they laid next to each other, Flower Girl inquired what he had in mind for the next day's agenda.

"Well, I guess there's no point in putting it off anymore. How about if we go ahead and have you give me my first driving lesson tomorrow after breakfast?"

She said "Yeah, sure. That works for me." She paused a beat and then asked "Sweetie, how come you never learned to drive?"

Gardner didn't answer right away. As the silence lengthened, Flower Girl realized that there must be some deeper emotional or psychological explanation attached to the situation and it wasn't just a matter of arrested development. She decided to just wait for him to answer in his own good time. Finally, she felt him grope for her hand in the dark and squeeze it.

"You don't have to answer, Sweetie, if you don't feel comfortable talking about it," she offered.

"No, I don't want there to be secrets between us. We said we wouldn't have any of those. It's, well, it's just hard to talk about, because it's tied in with my parents and the way they messed with my head."

She squeezed his hand back and said "How about if you sleep on it and you can tell me about it tomorrow, hmmm? It's been a long day."

Gardner said "Okay. Thanks, Flower. You're the best." He rolled over and kissed her lightly on the lips and said "Good night, sleep well."

She said "You too, Sweetie. Thank you for a wonderful day. I'll see you in my dreams."


	4. We Are Inn Love - Sunday

Sunday morning brunch was a big deal at the Mansion Inn, so the lovers decided to take advantage of what was on offer. There was a sumptuous buffet, with both continental breakfast and hot dishes served. Since it was a gorgeous day, they decided to take their plates out to the porch. Also, this afforded them a bit more privacy, and Flower Girl had it on her mind to resume the conversation they had deferred the night before about why Gardner had never learned how to drive.

As she nibbled from a bowl of fruit salad that she and Gardner were sharing, she asked "Sweetie, do you mind if we talk about the backstory to the reason why you don't drive?"

Gardner paused in mid-chew and gave her a constipated look, like he had something he might have to let go of but he felt involuntarily constrained. She gently stroked his arm and said "You don't have to talk about it if it really upsets you, but we did say no secrets, no phoniness, right?"

He laid his fork down and swallowed the mouthful he was working on and nodded. "You're right. And I knew this was coming, I just was dreading it, because it's just so embarrassing and hard to talk about."

"Does it traumatize you, would it be better if we waited until you at least aren't eating?" Flower Girl asked, mindful of her own issues with eating and knowing she didn't like discussing unpleasant things at the table.

He said "No, it doesn't matter. I'll take a breather from stuffing my face and just tell you the basics. And yes, I do want you to know the story because I did promise you I wouldn't hide things from my past anymore, that I'd let you roam all the rooms of my heart and mind. But yes, it is traumatizing and upsetting for me."

Flower Girl held Gardner's hand and nodded at him to continue.

He breathed deeply and took her back in time to his teenage years.

"This goes back to when I was preparing for my maturity, that ritual in my parents' religion when you turn sixteen and become an adult and ultimately get married and start your own family. Besides having to get a job and become a self-supporting individual, the other major task you're set is to learn how to drive. It was seen as another signifier of adult responsibility, particularly as it had state sanction that every kid can get their driver's license when they turn sixteen."

Flower Girl commented "That is so twisted, them glomming on to such a joyous event for a teenager and thinking somehow the state was giving imprimatur to their fucked up ritual."

Gardner nodded vigorously. "Yeah, for sure. They were always harping on that, that the state says you're an adult so everything else they were doing must be okay. Well, that turned me right against wanting to get my driver's license, because it was just one more step on the road to an end goal that I didn't want, which was being married off to this girl I didn't know and didn't want to marry, support and have babies with. I didn't want to be forced to be an adult. So my theory was, if I don't learn to drive, I can't be forced to be an adult. It was just another way for me to rebel."

"Oooh, you lil' rebel," Flower Girl crowed, "rebel _with_ a cause! It's funny how most kids can't wait to get their driver's license so they can rebel. For you it was the opposite."

"Yeah. The whole thing was pretty messed up. I was fighting to maintain my status as a kid at the same time that normally I'd be stretching my wings and wanting to grow up. I think you can attribute most of my mental quirks and issues to that dichotomy. It really messed me up. Anyway, back to learning to drive.

"My dad was not one to be trifled with. He used to come home from work and haul me out into the car and _make_ me learn how to drive. He's just throw me behind the wheel and it was like a big scary game of chicken, with me refusing to absorb the information he was giving me and the cars on the road would be about to hit us before he'd grab the wheel and save us from being killed. Then he'd scream at me and throw me out of the car and make me walk home from wherever we were."

Flower Girl turned pale at the thought of Gardner's sadistic father endangering both their lives for the sake of his stubborn adherence to a religious ritual, and his cruel punishment of his terrified son.

"My God, that sounds terrifying."

Gardner shuddered at the memory. "It was. In fact, I used to work myself up into panic attacks not unlike your own as I'd wait for my dad to come home. I think that's why I knew instantly, that first day I met you, that you were having a panic attack. I was able to identify all the signs, because they were so familiar to me."

Flower Girl gave a wistful smile to Gardner at the discovery of the source of his ability to diagnose her panic disorder with such precision: empathy. "Thank you for disclosing that to me, Sweetie. I'm glad to know you better. For what it's worth, it's given you real insight into my own problems with panic, for which I'm very grateful."

He nodded and continued his story. "After a while, my mother begged my dad to let her take over the driving lessons instead of him, which he did grant her. She used to take me out and we'd drive around and it was less scary, but from the minute we got in the car, she would start in on me, lecturing me in the most explicit terms about what my duties would be as a husband, nagging away at me in what was really just a proxy grievance session for all the things she hated about my dad. Believe me when I tell you that you don't ever want to know about your parents' sex life or their psychological dynamic. It really fucks you up. Not to mention she blamed a lot of it on me."

Flower Girl couldn't stand it anymore. She pushed her chair out and flung herself at Gardner, insinuating herself onto his lap and wrapping her arms around him tightly. "You poor, sweet baby boy," she bemoaned.

He sat stiffly as he let her hold him. She could feel goosebumps raised on his skin, which felt clammy despite the warmth of the day. She drew back to look at his face and noted his lips drawn in a thin line and his brows and forehead deeply furrowed.

She took her fingers and attempted to smooth out the deep wrinkles of negative emotions, but when they wouldn't budge she let her lips try to do the work instead. As she kissed him, she felt his body and face un-tense a bit. She stroked her fingers through his scalp, down his neck and over his shoulders and finally his back. They sat this way for a few minutes, until finally, Gardner began to unfurl from his defensive crouch and become open and more relaxed again.

"Is that better, Sweetie?" she asked.

Gardner nodded silently.

"Oh, Sweetie, that's another doozy of a story. Maybe even worse than the original story about your parents that you told me. You have been carrying that burden around all this time, and yet here you are, willing to share it with me now. I'm so honored and touched, I can't even express it properly." She fixed him with a bright smile to try to convey the optimism she felt that this communication breakthrough represented. She didn't want them to dwell on his horrible past, but on the promising future they had together.

Gardner said "I don't know what it is about you, but you give me strength and courage I never knew I had. And you give me hope. I see you going about your day, combatting present fear and past haunting memories, and you knock them down and move beyond them and get the most you can out of life. I want to be like you. I don't want to live in my past anymore. I want to move forward. I think with your help, I could maybe do that."

"Of course you can, Sweetie, and I am honored that you asked me to help you. Though I'm not sure I'm the best driving instructor in the world."

Gardner laughed. "Well, I kind of underplayed my skills. I pretty much _do_ know the basics of how to drive, despite my parents' sabotage. It's just that I never really put it all together because of the stressful atmosphere they created for me, and I've never practiced in a stress-free environment, and it's been almost a decade since I've been behind the wheel. So what I really need from you is to get me started again, and then be my passenger and to prompt me gently when I do something incorrect. Do you think we could just spend part of today refreshing my memory and then driving around and see how it goes?"

Flower Girl nodded vociferously. "Yes! And seeing as how we are in essence out in the middle of nowhere, where we've never been, it's the perfect environment. There's not a lot of traffic, and we can just go get lost and drive and drive. Or, if that seems too intimidating, we can start small. We can pick a parking lot at a shopping mall and see how that works for you and then if you're cool with that we'll spread our wings."

Gardner said "I think maybe that's the best way to begin. Something small and confined before we set me loose on humanity."

Flower Girl kissed each of his cheeks and hopped off his lap. Returning to her seat she took up her fork and said "Okay! It's a date! Now eat the rest of your breakfast. Or however much of it you want to eat, I mean." She smirked at her reference to her own vow not to be a member of the clean plate club.

After they finished eating, they gathered some things to take with them for what they hoped would be a fun day out, perhaps for a picnic if they could find somewhere to have one. The inn kindly provided them with an extra blanket they could sit on. Flower Girl drove them to the parking lot of a grocery store and headed for a far corner where there were no cars parked. She left the car idling and she and Gardner switched places, as she didn't want his first move to be to have to back out of a space.

"Okay, Sweetie. Why don't you just drive around the parking lot for a while and see how you feel?"

Gardner sat frozen in the driver's seat, gripping the steering wheel tightly until the skin on his hands became mottled white and red. Flower Girl ran her forefinger over his hands and said in a gentle voice "Loosen up your grip just a bit there. Keep your hands at the ten and two o'clock positions, and you'll be in perfect control of the car."

Gardner took his hands off the wheel, wiped them on his pants and tried again. He readjusted them more comfortably then smiled at her. "Good, that's very good, Sweetie. Okay, you're cleared for takeoff," she joked. "Now you know where the gas and the breaks are, but maybe you should just put your foot on each to remind yourself before you put the car into drive. Go ahead and try each."

Gardner felt for the gas, then felt for the break, then tried it a couple of more times to make sure he could reach them properly. He frowned and said "I think I need to adjust the seat. You're a bit shorter than I am."

Flower Girl said "That's fine. Feel to your left and there are some knobs and levers. Take your time to get it just right for your body."

Gardner fiddled around with the seat position for a few moments, then nodded his head.

Flower Girl said "Okay, now check your mirrors. They probably need to be readjusted. You can do the middle one with your hands, but the side mirrors are controlled by the buttons to your left." She waited for him to maneuver the knobs so that he could see out the side mirrors.

"Are you able to see behind you adequately, so that you can change lanes and see other cars coming up behind you?" she asked.

Gardner nodded and said "Yes. I think so."

She said "Okay, that's good. You may also want to just glance over your shoulder when you want to change lanes to make sure you don't have a blind spot. That's what I do. And don't forget to use your turn signals. Not only is it the law, but it's considerate. I hate assholes who don't use their turn signals. I usually put a hex on them, like hoping that they get painful urinary tract infections."

Gardner laughed "I already am loving this lesson so much more than the ones I had before. Is the profanity and resentment extra charge, or do you provide it for free?"

Flower Girl joked "With me, profanity is like breathing. It just comes with the territory. And actually, my therapist told me to stop putting hexes on people because it's bad karma for myself, so I don't really do that anymore. I'm just funning you."

Gardner giggled and said "Okay, I think I'm all set. Can I go ahead and drive now?"

Flower Girl smiled to herself at Gardner taking the initiative himself and her not having to prompt him. She was so proud of him for making it this far and if he hadn't gone any farther, she'd still have given him a ton of credit. "Yes, sure. Go for it! Do you know what you need to do next?"

Gardner looked with some bewilderment at the steering wheel and then down at the stick that controlled the car's settings: park, drive, neutral, first gear, second gear, reverse. He said "I need to get us out of park into drive, right?"

"Right! Good memory. Go ahead and slide that stick down to the letter D. But remember, keep your foot on the break as you do it, otherwise the car won't let you perform that function. That's a safety feature so you don't go barreling forward."

Gardner nodded and gingerly put the car into drive mode. When he felt the car jolt a bit as it readied itself to be driven, he gasped and gave her a look mixed with fright and delight.

"Don't be scared, Sweetie. It's just letting you know it's ready to be driven and that you are out of park mode and that you need to be careful now. Go ahead and drive forward."

"Can I drive real slowly to begin with?" he asked with trepidation.

Flower shrugged "Sure. I'd advise it, considering we're in a parking lot and not the Indy 500."

Gardner quirked his mouth into a smile and stuck his tongue out at her. He eased his foot on the gas and the car jolted forward. Panicking, he reached for the gas pedal.

"What's wrong, Sweetie?" she asked.

"I, I don't know. It just feels like a lot of power in my control. Like it's too much for me to handle."

She put her hand on his shoulder and smoothed it back and forth. "I know, that's a very natural feeling. I remember feeling that way myself the first few times I drove a car. And it's been a long time since you've driven, so you just need to re-acclimate yourself to that sensation. Just give it a go. It will come back to you."

Gardner took a deep breath and stepped on the gas again. The car crept forward and he gingerly led it down one aisle of the parking lot until he reached the end, then stopped.

"Now what?" he asked, sounding a little panicked.

"Now you need to make a turn and go up another aisle," Flower Girl counseled him.

"Aren't turns very difficult to do once you're stopped?" he asked. "Maybe you should take over and turn the car and then I'll handle the straight bit," he suggested.

Flower Girl smiled and shook her head. "No, Sweetie. Try to relax. Remember, you told me yourself, you already know how to drive. You're just in brain lock right now, probably because you're nervous. You've forgotten what you already know. Turns are quite simple, even if you have stopped. You just press the gas and turn the wheel. This car has automatic gears and power steering. It practically drives itself. Go on and give it a try."

Gardner attempted to make a left turn, but he was wide of the mark. He groaned in defeat. "Now what?" he cried.

"No big deal, you will just need to put the car in reverse, back it up a bit and make room for it to straighten out so it can go forward down the next lane," she said, as if she was telling him he needed to just take the next breath and not complete a tricky driving maneuver.

Gardner's dismay was plain to read upon his face. "You're joking, right?"

Flower Girl said "Do you have another idea of how to get there? Gardner, I am giving you driving lessons and you have already paid me handsomely for my services, so please just trust me and listen to what I am telling you."

He looked deeply into her eyes, saw patience and truth there, and decided to trust her. "Okay. I'll do what you say. But if I mess up ..."

"If you mess up, it's not the fall of the Roman Empire. We are in a parking lot performing the simplest of driving maneuvers and you will be just fine, I promise you."

Again, Gardner subjected Flower Girl to his truth-o-meter, or possibly his bullshit meter at this point, found she was giving it to him straight, and knew he could rely on her words to help him achieve his goals and protect him from harm.

He said "Okay, now I need to reverse the car, so I slide this down to R, right?" He pointed to the gear shift.

She nodded her head and said "Very good. I didn't even have to give you a hint. You figured it out for yourself."

That gave Gardner some self-confidence. He shifted the car into reverse, then he threw his arm behind him onto the passenger seat and checked the view behind the car. Gently, he depressed the gas and drove the car in reverse until Flower Girl said "Okay, stop. Now you should be able to make the turn down the aisle."

He maneuvered the car down the aisle and gave Flower Girl a triumphant grin that she matched with one of pride. "Good job! Now how about if you just drive up and down the aisles and get comfortable?"

"What direction should I drive, left or right?" he asked.

She checked and said "It doesn't look like there are any arrows saying you have to choose one way or another, so just practice your turns going both ways. Why don't you practice left turns for now and then we can switch to right turns when you feel like you've cracked that?"

Gardner nodded. "Okay sounds good."

He drove loops around the same two aisles over and over. Then he decided to venture a little further and eventually he made a circuit of the parking lot and drove the whole circumference, making left turns around the perimeter.

"How's that?" he asked Flower Girl.

"That was brilliant. How about if you go down that next aisle but when you get to the end, you turn right instead?"

Gardner looked a little dubious, but decided to give it a try. He ran into the same problem as before. He overshot the mark and there wasn't enough room for him to make the turn. He looked frustrated. "Now what?" he lamented.

"Don't fret, just hang on," she reassured him. "You just need to back the car up again like you did before so you have room to squeeze it around the corner. Okay?"

Gardner nodded. This time, he had a hard time maneuvering the car in reverse, and it took a couple of times before he had it in position to make the right turn. He swiped beads of perspiration from his upper lip and wiped them on his jeans.

"It's okay, Sweetie, you just need to get your bearings and depth perception working together. You will get the hang of it, I promise you." Flower Girl tapped his knee and nodded at his foot to indicate that he should go ahead and hit the gas and continue driving.

He said "Yeah, I feel like a fish riding a bicycle. It's just really awkward."

"I know. It will come back to you though. You're just all up in your head right now. Let's get you some more practice and then we'll take a break, okay?"

He nodded and this time managed to squeeze the car down the aisle to the right. He exhaled a puff air he obviously had been holding in and smiled. They spent some time making right-handed loops in the parking lot. Suddenly, without warning, Gardner got to a crossing and made a left-handed turn instead of a right turn without prompting and whooped with glee. Flower Girl yipped along with him "Yahooey! That's the way to do it, dude! Way to go!"

Now Gardner was zigzagging through the parking lot, driving around randomly, aimlessly, and looking much more relaxed. He was even able to stop for pedestrians and other cars. Flower Girl decided to challenge him a bit further and probe his parking skills.

"Think you can park this baby in one of those slots?"

Gardner winced at the prospect of doing something new but took a deep breath and nodded in agreement. "I'll give it a shot."

"Why don't you drive over to the far side of the parking lot where there are no cars and we'll have you try parking the car over there? That way if you miss the mark it won't matter."

He nodded and headed for the end of the row of striped parking spaces. "Should I pull in anywhere particularly?"

Flower Girl said "Nope, just pick a good spot where you're comfortable. That's how you'd do it in real life anyway. I never park near a car if I can avoid it. I find it easier to park a couple of spaces away. We can practice the close parking at some later date. Let's just get you familiar with the basics for now."

Gardner exhaled a breath of relief and headed for a space and pulled the car in. The car was a bit crooked and he frowned at his inexactitude.

"I guess I don't have much coordination, do I?" he scolded himself.

She soothed him. "Hey, it's your first attempt. And believe me, sometimes my parking job starts out looking exactly the same and then I have to straighten it out. So now what you need to do is back it out and try to straighten yourself out. Just do what you did when you were trying to get the car down the aisle."

Gardner nodded and reached for the reverse gear. He seesawed the car forward and backward a few times until he was satisfied that he was dead center in the middle of the parking spot. Then he flashed a grin and let his hands slide down from the steering wheel into lap in relief.

"Great job, honey! You did it!" Flower Girl praised him. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and offered her hand for a high five. Gardner limply returned it, the stress seeming to have sapped most of his energy.

She asked "Want to do that one more time and then we'll call it quits for now?"

He inhaled another big breath and said "Okay. Sounds good."

He reversed the car out of the space and started down the aisle. He circled until he was back in the same place and this time, he managed to pull the car into the spot in one go with it sitting relatively in the center.

"Yay!" Flower Girl crowed. "You really are getting the hang of this! You just need to be reminded of the experience and then you'll put it all together and figure it out! You are going to be just fine, you really are."

Gardner beamed with happiness at her assessment of his driving and the extent of his accomplishments so far. He reached for her hands and gave them a gentle squeeze.

"Thank you so much, Flower. This has been so incredibly helpful. It was really scary at first, but you were so gentle and patient. Everything that my parents were not. You've given me hope that I can overcome this fear and the stumbling blocks I've set up for myself."

She gave him the most confident look she could muster and said "Of course you will conquer this challenge, Gardner. You've put so much of your past behind you already. I feel like this is really a very small piece of it. It's just a technical skill that you want to acquire. You already have faced down your fear now. You shared it with me, and we are going to confront it together. I won't let anyone hurt you, and your parents are now gone from your life anyway. I will protect you from any other monsters that crop up. And you're going to do the same for me." She shivered a bit as she contemplated where the in the world her abusive ex-boyfriend might be floating around.

He kissed her and wrapped his arms around her, cradling her, claiming her, clinging on to her. That gesture meant so many things to him in this particular moment.

"You're going to be okay, Sweetie. We both will," she whispered in his ear.

When he broke his hold on her, he leaned back and swiped away at a few tears that had descended down his cheeks. He felt like the moment was getting too heavy, so he made a joke of his crying. "Clearly, I can't drive when I have moisture obscuring my vision. Okay if I turn the wheel over to you now?"

Flower Girl nodded and said "Definitely okay. I think you deserve a rest now. How about if we run into that market, pick out some picnic things and then I drive us out into the country and we look for a picnic spot?"

Gardner nodded his assent. "Good plan."

"Okay, now turn the car off and you'll be all set for now. Remember how to do that?"

He nodded and put the car in park, then turned the key in the ignition.

She said "If you were on a road that was at all hilly, you'd want to set the emergency break, but since it's flat here, it's not necessary." She gesticulated towards where that break was and how to operate it.

"Okay, good to know," he said.

They held hands as they strolled towards the store. When they got there, Gardner chose a shopping cart for them. In the time they had been dating, they had fallen into certain roles and habits, and one of them was that when they went to the grocery store, Gardner liked to drive the shopping cart. It made Flower Girl smile to watch him take command of this part of the chore so that he could fussily arrange their purchases. It served a psychological purpose for Flower Girl as well, as it alleviated the need for her to look up in the crowded store. She wasn't keen on big, crowded supermarkets and tried to avoid them as much as possible, so any assistance she could get from her "service dog," as she jokingly referred to Gardner, she'd gladly accept. In turn, her role was to keep the frequent purchaser card and rack up discount member perks. She also had a ritual of speaking with the checkout clerk pleasantly and thanking them profusely for their help, making sure they felt valued as human beings, since she was really quite a people person despite her agoraphobia, while Gardner found himself flustered talking to strangers outside the confines of his job. Together, they made a great team, each relying on their respective strengths.

They picked up a couple of types of cheese, some pre-sliced salami, a fruit salad, a baguette, a container of cut veggies, a mixed nut medley, and a small tray of assorted cookies from the bakery. They threw some bottles of water and orange juice in the cart next. Flower Girl stuffed into her capacious handbag an array of utensils and napkins that she stole from the in-store deli while Gardner turned pink from embarrassment.

She scoffed "What? You think they keep track to make sure people who use this stuff bought their food here? Puhlease!"

Gardner whined "Can we please just get out of here and bring our stuff up to the register, Bonnie? I don't want to get busted and end up in the hoosegow for boosting a spork. I've got a clean record I'd like to protect."

Flower Girl guffawed and parried "Didn't know you were going to be living life on the wild side when you started dating me, didja Clyde?"

Gardner said in as sultry a voice he could conjure "And every day you make it wilder and wilder." He let his hand roam southward to Flower Girl's bum and gave it a small pinch.

"Hey! We're in public! Who's getting wild now, you exhibitionist!" she laughed.

They purchased their goods and carried them out to the car. Gardner praised Flower Girl for her poise in the supermarket and lack of apparent anxiety.

"You did really well in there, Girlie. No panicking, and you kept your eyes open the whole time."

As if it hadn't occurred to her, she said "Whoa, yeah, I did, didn't I? I guess I was so excited to be collecting stuff for our next adventure, I was totally focused on that, not on my usual hangups. And also, I'm still buzzing off the high you gave me from how brave you were driving that car. I'm so inspired by your pluckiness, Sweetie. You really were a power of example to me for facing your fears."

Using a cartoon voice that sounded like Disney's Goofy Gardner said "Awww shucks, misses, tweren't nuthin'."

Flower Girl sassed back "Says you..."

They drove around the area surrounding the inn where they were staying to get the lay of the land. After a while, they found a place called Landa Park that appealed to them. There were trees for shade and a body of water. Although it seemed to be a touristy place, it was a large park and there were plenty of secluded areas, so it seemed ideal. They struck out to find a place where they could have their picnic in relative solitude.

They ended up beneath a stand of trees that nearly obscured them from view, well away from the path they had taken to reach them. They spread the blanket the inn had given them on the ground and sat down, then they unpacked their bags from the supermarket laden with goodies.

Flower Girl tittered with amusement. "This reminds me of one of my favorite books, _The Wind In The Willows_ , when Ratty and Moley go on the river for the first time and take a picnic with them. The Mole is so excited about it all and he begs the Rat to allow him to unpack the picnic basket and of course the Rat is delighted to sit back and be lazy and let him do it. But then when it's time to leave, the Mole gets finagled into doing the less glamorous job of packing the basket back up again."

Gardner smiled and said "I call 'not it' for cleaning up this mess!"

Flower Girl flipped him off and said "I am _not_ the Mole and you _will_ pull your weight on this adventure!" She clung onto the bag she was unpacking. "Otherwise, I'm going to keep all the cookies for myself."

Gardner gave a mock sad face and said "Those cookies are my reward for taking my first driving lesson! You can't deprive me now."

Flower Girl said "You'd rather have cookies than a kiss?"

Gardner brightened up and said "Oh, well, I didn't realize that was on offer. I'd rather have a kiss any day for any reason."

Flower Girl shook her head sarcastically and said "It's _so_ easy to play you."

Gardner scooted forward with his lips comically puckered and said "Where's my reward?"

She warded him off with the plastic bag and said "Here's your reward, you get to unpack the rest of the food!"

"Taskmaster!" Gardner grumbled and accepted the bag she was proffering. He started taking the food out and laying it on the blanket before them.

Flower Girl leaned forward and kissed him behind his ear and whispered "You'll get your reward later, when we get back to the hotel. You can be in charge of what we do today. How does that sound?"

Gardner dropped the chunk of cheese that he had been fumbling to unwrap and looked back at his girl with the kind of hunger that did not emanate from his stomach. He said "That sounds real good. Can we leave now?"

She smacked his bum and said "Come on now, let's do things in order, shall we? Food first, maybe some more driving, and then rewards come at the end of the day. Be a good boy now, hmmm?"

Gardner leaned back and captured her mouth with his and gave her a masterpiece of a kiss that left her breathless. Then he turned back to his task, picked up the cheese and resumed trying to peel its plastic covering off. "Okay, sounds like a plan. But I warn you, the longer you make me wait, the stronger the storm that's building."

Flower Girl looked around, observed their surroundings more closely, and said "Well, maybe if we don't see anyone around here, we can blow off a bit of steam once we've had lunch."

"Now you're talking," Gardner growled low and gave her another kiss, plus a tiny tweak to one of her nipples. She squeaked with surprise and just a bit of longing.

After they had eaten their fill, Flower Girl dug her paperback out of her bag and handed Gardner his journal. Though she tried to concentrate on her reading, she was intrigued to see him writing furiously and wondered what he was journaling about. Finally, he slammed shut the cover and laid his pen aside and she decided to broach the topic.

"You sure had a lot to say today," she observed.

"Yeah, I did," he agreed. "I needed to get some things off my chest about the driving lesson and all those memories it brought up. I feel better now."

She looked at him with gratitude and awe at how far he had come in being open with her about his feelings and his past. "Thank you for sharing that with me. There was a time when I think you wouldn't have done so."

A look passed over his face that made it clear that that thought had not occurred to him until she just pointed it out to him. "Wow, yeah, I guess you're right. Well, I'm fully committed to being open with you, though I don't want to always tell you what I'm writing and I definitely don't want you reading my journal."

Flower Girl said "Of course not, that's totally fine. I wouldn't expect you to let me read it. Though if you ever do want to read me something you wrote, like for instance, if you wrote something down and it just flowed better to read it to me than to say it to me, that would be fine."

This was a new concept and Gardner seemed to chew it over in his mind. "Yeah, that could be something that might come up someday. I'll keep it in mind."

He laid down on the blanket and beckoned to her with his arms. "Come 'ere, gorgeous."

Flower Girl grinned broadly, marked her place in her book and dropped it on the blanket. She crawled over to him and snuggled up into his grasp. "Hi," she said and batted her eyelashes flirtatiously.

"It's pretty secluded here don't you think?" Gardner asked. "I haven't seen anyone walk by here since we got here."

Flower Girl hummed "Mmmm, you may be right about that. I haven't really been paying attention. Why do you ask, as if I don't already know?"

Gardner gave a low growl and pulled her in for a kiss. "How about a little al fresco lovin'?"

She adopted an exaggerated southern accent and said "Well I do declare, Mr. Langway, you do have a broad vocabulary for a hick who's never been outside of Texas."

He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows. "I can do all sorts of talented things with my mouth besides speechifying." He gave her another kiss that left her breathless and in no doubt of his neediness and hunger for her. She decided to throw caution to the wind and let him guide their actions for now. It wasn't as though anyone knew them or could identify them if they got caught, anyway.

He pulled her on top of him and maneuvered her hips so that she was straddling the bulge that was straining at the zipper of his jeans. As they played tonsil hockey, he rutted against her, seeking relief for his aching erection. To increase the pressure, he clamped his hands down on her ass cheeks and gave a hard squeeze, which elicited a moan from her. Dissatisfied with the amount of contact he was achieving, he slipped his hands underneath the skirt of her dress and underwear and caressed her bare ass cheeks, and her moans turned to purrs.

"I wish I had a pillow made of your ass cheeks. They're so soft and squishy," he observed.

She laughed. "I'm going to try to take that as a compliment and a) not be insulted and b) not worry that you've got Buffalo Bill from _Silence of the Lambs_ tendencies."

Gardner said "Okay, this time, I get the reference because I've actually seen the movie. Calvin forced me to watch that one. He's got a taste for horror movies."

"Do you?" she asked.

"Definitely not. I practically peed my pants ten times while I watched that movie. Alfred Hitchcock is more my speed, and even some of his movies scare the heck out of me, but in a good way."

"You'll have to continue my education on his oeuvre and rent more of his movies for us. We only saw the lighthearted ones because I couldn't stand the crowds screaming and shouting when we saw them in person, but I do like a good thriller and Hitchcock is so stylish and clever."

He gave her a loving look like he was positive he had met his soulmate and brightly kissed her on each cheek. "It's a date!" he promised, giving another squeeze to each ass cheek, which made her giggle and flinch.

He ground his crotch into her again and groaned. "This is very unsatisfying, I have to say."

She sighed "I know. You haven't even touched my lady parts, never mind my tatas, so don't complain. It's just not optimal to be doing this out in the open. How about if we go back to the hotel and let loose our primal urges in the privacy of our lovely, expensive hotel room?"

"Sounds good. Maybe someday we'll be able to afford a trip to a private island and I can make love to you out in the open. That would be cool."

She lifted her head from his chest and looked at him searchingly. "You'd like that?"

"Oh yes, definitely. You buck naked in nature? That paints a very pretty picture in my mind."

She smiled and asked "Why do I think you've already had that picture in your mind many, many times before already?"

Gardner's expression assumed a picture of innocence and he said "I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about."

Her smile turned wry and sardonic and she reached down to tickle his ribs. "Yeah, right."

He jumped up to evade her tickling and dumped her on the blanket. She rolled over and exclaimed "Now I know how to get you moving fast if I ever need to!"

With his hands on his hips, he surveyed the mess they had made with their picnic. With only a half-hearted attempt to keep a straight face, he said "Okay, Mole, now I'm graciously going to let you clean up the picnic things." He made a feint towards the direction of the path that led to the parking lot and said "I'll be waiting in the boat on the river."

Flower Girl frowned and said "You're like a sponge. I've got to stop sharing my favorite literary references with you."

As she bent down to start packing up, he took the opportunity to smooth his hand over her bum and she playfully groused "Oh, I see how it is, you just wanted to cop a feel! You could have just said so, you know."

He bent down to meet her face and kissed her. "I couldn't resist. It was hanging out there, beckoning to me like a beacon."

"How poetic," she grumbled and rolled her eyes, then kissed him back. "Now that you're down here, take these," and she handed him a pile of used napkins and discarded wrappers.

He laughed and said "You sure do know how to use your assets to get what you want."

She stood up and flipped her hair back. "Every smart woman does," she observed. "I try not to abuse it, though." She started walking towards the parking lot.

"You didn't use it on me, did you?" He looked suddenly unsure of himself, like the ground was shifting beneath his feet.

"No, of course not. You never made it necessary. You were sweet as sugar to me from the second you met me. That's yet another reason your nickname is Sweetie." She kissed him on both cheeks and booped him on the nose. "I'm talking about dealing with difficult situations, unpleasant situations. And yes, it's true that you catch more flies with honey than vinegar, as my momma always says. It just never hurts to be nice to people and approach them with kindness, and if you happen to have huge knockers, well, that doesn't hurt if that person is male, that's all I'm saying."

Gardner paused as if he was doing a complicated mathematical theorem in his head, then nodded and started walking again. He said "Yeah, I guess that's pretty much true. We're kind of hardwired to think that way. Men, I mean. Though boobs aren't everything. Paige was pretty flat-chested."

"Oh was she?" Flower Girl asked sassily. "Tell me more..."

Gardner's eyes started to dart from side to side, realizing he had kind of stepped on a landmine. He flailed about. "Uhm, well, yeah. She looked okay when she had her clothes on, but it turned out it was sort of an illusion. She wore these bras that made it look like she had a lot more going on up top than she actually had. They were actually pretty magical."

Finding this charmingly naïve and candid, Flower cackled with laughter. "Well _that_ must have been disappointing!"

He shrugged. "Not really. I mean, it was my first encounter with a pair of breasts, so I was actually thrilled out of my skull." He averted his eyes from Flower Girl's face to her chest and said "But YOU. You're something else entirely. I thought I was going to pass out the first time I saw you topless. I actually felt lightheaded."

Flower Girl blushed and smiled, satisfied that there was no competition between her and Paige. "Thanks for reassuring me."

He paused and pulled her in towards him for a hug and managed to run his hands up and down her body, taking inventory of all her curves. "This is heaven on Earth for me. That's why I call you Goddess."

"You called me Mole not five minutes ago..." she reminded him and resumed their trek towards the car.

"Well, I have lots of nicknames for you. I'm sure I'm going to come up with many more, so just keep a list."

She laughed and shook her head. "You know, it's funny, I sometimes even forget my own name, that it's Leah. I've started thinking of myself exclusively as Flower Girl or Flower now."

"For me, that's who you were almost immediately," he confessed. "I knew somehow, in some way, you were mine, even if you were only to be my friend, and I could never get flowers out of my head when I was around you because you always smelled like them, dressed like them, even sort of looked like them with your rosy coloring. You just _are_ Flower Girl, and it's hard for me to even think of you otherwise."

"That's okay with me. I like how you claimed me with that name. It's like the hickey. You claimed me in your own special way. For all I feel that I am an introverted, independent person and I guard my privacy and solitude, I do like being part of a pair with you. I like us to belong to each other, and I like giving myself to you."

"Me too, Flower. I fought against it so hard when my parents were trying to force me into it, and I never could picture myself finding someone worthy of that gift or frankly who would want to accept it because I didn't think much of myself as any great prize worth having. But you, you made me feel like I was worth claiming, worth investing yourself in, and you worked so hard at making our relationship have integrity. You were patient and suspended judgment until I could get my shit together. Not even my parents did that for me."

"Oh, Baby Boy, they should have, they really should have. You know that now, don't you?" she asked, pleading with him to let go of the idea that he hadn't been worthy of his parents' love.

"I guess so. It's hard for me to judge. When I saw how Calvin's parents would treat him, I knew that there was something wrong with my own family, but I didn't put it together that it was because my parents were messed up. I thought it was because I was an inadequate son who couldn't satisfy their demands."

"Well that's a lie they fed you. They were straight-up lunatics. Religious fanatics. You grew up in a fucking cult! I just thank heaven you got yourself out and are as normal as you are."

Gardner snorted. "Normal is _not_ a word I'd use to describe myself."

"Okay, eccentric. Or idiosyncratic. We've agreed that we are idiosyncratic, right? I personally call myself a highly functioning nut, but you can decide for yourself how you want to refer to yourself. Believe it or not, I'm one of my therapist's star patients. Most of the people he treats don't attend school or have jobs or even leave their homes other than to attend their appointments with him."

Gardner whistled and said "Wow, I'm impressed! I had no idea I was in the presence of a star."

Flower Girl slipped her sunglasses on and joked "No autographs, please."

When they reached the car, Gardner automatically walked over to the passenger side out of habit. Flower Girl cleared her throat and dangled the keys at him. "Excuse me, Mister, I suddenly feel completely unable to drive us out of here. Do you think you could handle it for a while?"

Gardner looked from her smile to the keys and back again, then gulped and blinked a few times. He took a deep breath and said "Okay, I'll give it a try."

"Great! That's what I want to hear. That you will try. It doesn't have to be a big deal. You can stop and switch with me at any time. Let's just get you a little practice. Okay?"

Gardner nodded a big grimly and said "Okay. Let's do it." He came around to the driver's side and took the keys from her. He opened the door and she pointed to the button for him to open the trunk so that she could put all their trash and other junk inside it. Then she ran around to the passenger side and slid in.

Gardner took a moment to squirm around in his seat, check his mirrors, tap the gas and the break, and look over his shoulder to orient himself to the car's location. Then he started the ignition and put the car in reverse. With his arm over the passenger seat, he looked behind him and started to back out of their parking spot.

"That's good, Sweetie. You can also use your middle mirror to see if anything is behind you, but I do tend to look over my shoulder just to make sure I'm judging depth correctly."

Gardner nodded silently and slid the car into drive, then pulled a left and began driving them towards the parking lot exit. When they got to the exit, there was no traffic light and he was going to have to make a left turn into oncoming traffic. He started to panic.

"What do I do? There's no light or arrow or anything? Those cars are just coming and coming!"

"Easy there, Sweetie. It's okay. Just nudge the car out a bit so they know you want to pull out, and then just wait. Eventually, traffic will clear because the traffic lights will stop the flow of traffic. Then you'll get your chance to pull out and you'll take it. Make sure you have your left turn signal on, right, cuz you're not an asshole like we talked about earlier, hmm?"

This elicited a small giggle from Gardner and he activated his turn signal. "Don't want you putting a hex on me, that's for sure," he said and he squirmed as he thought of what one of her urinary tract infection hexes might feel like.

"Don't worry, I'll never do that to you. I promise I'll be lenient on you. I'll just turn you into a toad or something." She giggled and the tension receded from Gardner's face even further as they waited for the traffic to clear.

Finally, there was an opening for him to make the turn and Flower Girl prompted him. "See how there are no cars coming from either direction? Now it's your turn to go. Make the turn now."

"What do I do?" Gardner panicked.

"Just go ahead and drive out into the middle of the road and make your left turn into that left lane."

"Okay..." he said. He sounded dubious and frightened but he did it flawlessly.

"See, you did it, Sweetie!" she exclaimed. "Great job!"

Gardner exhaled an enormous breath. "Yeah, I did, didn't I?" he said, quite apparently weak with relief.

"You sure did! That's probably the trickiest maneuver you'll have to do in a month of Sundays, and you did it beautifully. Good job, my Sweetie."

Gardner darted his eyes towards her quickly to soak in her approval, then focused back on the road in front of him. A big grin began to spread open his face and stayed there until they reached the first traffic light. Then he let out another sigh of relief and said "Thanks for believing in me."

Flower Girl said "It's easy to do."

They remained silent except for Flower Girl giving Gardner directions on how to drive back to the hotel. Amazingly, he made it all the way back, even though he had originally intended to only drive a few blocks and then turn control of the car back over to Flower Girl. Before he knew it, they were back at the inn and he was confronted with the task of maneuvering the car into a parking spot.

"Do you think you're up for trying to park the car, Sweetie?"

He took a deep, determined breath and said "I'll give it a shot."

This time, he had to pull the car into a spot that was between two other cars, so it was a tighter fit. Complicating things was that there were no lines but just dirt and gravel. He took his time and only had to readjust the car once before he was sure the car was plumb in the center of the spot. When he turned off the ignition, he turned to Flower Girl and this time he initiated the high five.

"Great job, Sweetie! I'm so proud of you. You are really getting the hang of things. I personally would have needed a couple of minutes to get this sucker snugly in that spot when I was first learning to drive. Maybe even now I wouldn't feel so confident."

Gardner smiled with quiet satisfaction but said nothing. He seemed a bit overwhelmed and appeared to be just taking it all in. Flower Girl decided nothing more need be said and she opened her door and got out. She wanted to leave him with his thoughts, knowing that he was processing a lot, and reflecting that when she was feeling overwhelmed she sometimes just needed some quiet time to work it all through.

They gathered up their stuff and inquired at the front desk as to where they could ditch their trash bags. After that was taken care of, they went upstairs to their suite. After a trip to the bathroom to freshen up and take a leak, Gardner threw himself heavily down on the bed and curled up into himself and closed his eyes. Flower Girl could tell he needed some alone time so she sat in a chair, pulled the other one towards her so she could prop up her feet, and read her book while Gardner napped. Once he was safely in La La Land, deeply asleep, she moved to the bed and laid down and continued to read until she too dozed off.

Flower Girl was awakened to the sound of noise coming from the bathroom, first the toilet flushing and then the sink running. Then the bed dipped down and Gardner was snuggling up to her. Her eyes still closed, she could feel his sleep-warmed body radiating its heat and she drew nearer to its source. Burying her face in his neck, she asked "Did you have a nice nap? Are you feeling okay?"

Gardner nodded wordlessly. He started planting a series of kisses on her shoulder and neck. Then he took hold of her face and drew it up and just gazed at it for a few long seconds. There was love, devotion and desire in that gaze. He moved in for a kiss that started tenderly but quickly developed into something heated and needy.

His fingers found their way back into her hair and he held her head firmly to his to sustain and deepen the kiss. Soon the kiss was less about feelings and more about heat. It became erratic and breathless and sloppy, with tongues and teeth dueling in a frenzy to give vent to overwrought emotion.

"Want you, Flower," Gardner gasped.

"Take what you want then. Take me over. I trust you," Flower gasped between kisses.

Gardner peeled off her cotton cardigan sweater and kissed each shoulder as it was exposed. She was wearing a lacy camisole underneath. As he let his fingers tickle her silken, fair, freckled skin, she closed her eyes and exhaled deeply through her nose, squirming as he brushed her chest and dipped down into her cleavage. He used his teeth to lower the camisole's shoulder straps and along with it her bra straps as well.

Pressing kisses along the edge of the fabric still concealing her breasts, Gardner rubbed his beard stubble over her sensitive skin. She moaned and pushed his head down to gain more traction for his stubble and started to use her own hands to manipulate it and rub it all over herself. She herself started to nudge down her shirt until her breasts were exposed and could receive the same stimulation the rest of her was feeling.

Gardner took over, pulling both shirt and bra down so that her nipples popped out but were still hoisted up by her bra. It was an erotic sight that sent a jolt to his cock and filled his mouth with saliva. He rubbed his face over her nipples as she squirmed and sighed her contentment with the sensations she was experiencing, requesting more attention in more areas and more pressure. Eventually, Gardner could resist it no longer and he had to let his tongue join the party.

He sucked and twirled his tongue over her nipples as they protruded from her bra, causing her to jolt and squirm with passion and delight. "Oh, they feel so sensitive and alive with them still caged in their confines that way. It feels different like that. Really goooood," she enthused, suddenly losing focus as Gardner started to increase the pressure and suck and pinch her harder, as he now knew she liked, thanks to the feedback and guidance she had previously given him.

By now he was starting to lose any sense of control he thought he had, and he yanked her bra down the rest of the way, exposing her whole breasts. He clasped them in his hands and squeezed and licked them, burying his whole face in them in order to lose himself in their pillowy paradise. He swiped his beard on the tender flesh underneath them, and the sensitive skin on either side of them, as Flower Girl writhed and moaned. But for her, what she seemed to want most was his attention on her nipples, and she took hold of them and directed them towards his mouth, and he was happy to oblige her.

Suddenly, she sat up and said "I've got to get rid of this thing," and reached behind herself and unfastened her bra. Then she quickly whipped it and her camisole off. Next, she lunged for Gardner's t-shirt, ripped it off, and threw her chest against his and rubbed against him vigorously, glorying in the skin-to-skin contact. She dipped down and took one of his nipples in her mouth and began to give him his own due, and he craned his neck and arched his back to give her better access. Soon enough, he was the one moaning and panting.

She let her hand stray to his crotch and said "You in the mood to do something about that down there?"

Gardner nodded frantically and said "Yes, that's a yes. Nice of you to ask, but it's pretty much always a yes."

Flower Girl grinned and said "How about we get rid of these clothes, then?"

She popped the button on his jeans and lowered the zipper. Gardner took care of the rest while she watched with a mixture of amusement and lust. She took a moment to admire the boxer briefs he was wearing that she had finally convinced him to try out. She liked them better than the baggy, stripy boxers he customarily wore when they first started dating.

She gave a low whistle and said "Dayum, Sweetie, I still can't get over how sexy you look in those new undies."

Gardner blushed and said "I don't know, I think they're kind of, maybe, too much?"

Flower Girl shook her head dismissively. "Absolutely not, they're just enough. I mean, they still cover plenty. It's not like you're wearing bikinis or a thong. But I get to see a little bit better what you're packing and the curve of your ass and your strong thighs. Yum."

Before Gardner could argue more or get even more embarrassed, Flower Girl started to run her hands over him and squeeze his bits, and he completely lost the thread of his embarrassment and could only keep track of the pleasure he was feeling. He let her lower his boxer briefs and his erection sprang free, slapping against his stomach with lively attention that he noticed made Flower Girl smile and her mouth twitch with hunger. This gave him more confidence in the new garment.

She started to reach for his package but he said "Oh, no, wait a second, let's get you naked, too. I want to enjoy the view before you get to doing whatever you have in mind next."

She shrugged her shoulders and said "Fair enough," and let Gardner pull her skirt off. He ran his fingers under her butt cheeks and teased them until there were goosebumps shimmering on them. He gave her a mischievous smile when he noted her reaction.

"Are you cold or turned on, baby?"

"T-turned on," she stammered. "But I don't want you to keep me from ravishing you. That was my plan, unless you'd rather I not do that."

"Oh, yeah, I'm okay with that. But I'd still like to get you naked. Let me just ..." and he pulled her panties down and let her step out of them. He returned his hands to her backside and smoothed over the chill bumps. "Let me warm you up before I turn you loose on me."

"That's okay, I'm fine. Just lie down," she insisted, steering him to the bed.

He laughed at her eagerness.

He flung himself down on the bed and got comfortable, then waited for her next move. She spread his legs and started to kiss her way down to the crooks of his knees, then licked him. This elicited a gasp that took Gardner by surprise, as a thrill ran through him. He was stunned that Flower Girl had managed to find yet another erogenous zone on him.

"Mmmm, you like that?" she asked, giving him a gleeful smile.

He nodded his head, a bit breathless and unable to speak.

"Good to know," she responded and switched to the back of his other knee. Then she let her tongue trail up his thigh and started to take small, biting kisses out of his flesh. Gardner twitched and moaned as she nibbled and chewed on him.

"Go ahead," he sputtered, still breathless.

Her head shot up, expression questioning.

"What? What do you want, Sweetie?"

"It's, it's what _you_ want, right? Go ahead and mark me, if you want," he added, suddenly shy.

She said "I wasn't really thinking about that just at the moment, but yeah, I can do that if _you_ want it."

Gardner gave a small nod. "Yeah. I want it. Just a little bit. Not too many."

Flower Girl smiled and started to include suction in her attention to his thighs, leaving him with two small love bites, one on each side. Gardner looked down and admired them with a smile playing upon his lips. "I have to admit that's pretty hot."

She looked immensely gratified that what started as an uncomfortable confession on her part at the beginning of their weekend was now a burgeoning conversation between the two of them. She felt reassured that going forward, their level of communication on matters sexual would continue to improve and grow.

She kissed her way up his legs until she was centered over his package. She nuzzled it with her nose and inhaled his very male, intoxicating Gardner scent and let her eyelashes flutter with pleasure. Gardner felt them brush against his sensitive skin and exhaled a small breath in reaction.

She took him in hand and licked the mushroom head of his penis gently, immediately hearing sounds of approval from him. She warned him "This isn't a prelude to anything. I'm in the mood to take you all the way with this, so please let me have my way." She looked at him and saw him nod his acquiescence. He had a look of surprise and bewilderment on his face that she couldn't interpret, but she decided not inquire. She was purpose driven right now and the time for talking had ended. As she felt him go slack and settle in for what he knew was going to be a no-effort pleasure cruise, she smiled to herself and felt the triumph of her own assertiveness.

She resumed licking the head, focusing on the underside where it met the shaft, and heard Gardner's reaction kick up with louder breathing and moans and knew she was where he wanted her to be. She didn't stay there for long, however, as she wanted to draw this out for him more since this wasn't just an appetizer but the main course. She let her tongue trail lazily up and down his length, teasingly at first and then applying increasing pressure. His verbalizations indicated to her that he was wanting more, but she wasn't quite ready to give it to him. This needed to be done on her terms.

Instead, she licked her way down to this balls and teased them with her tongue, first one and then the other, from the front and then the side. He seemed to be most sensitive on the side nearest his thigh; every time she approached that area, he hissed with pleasure. Finally, she took the entire mound into her mouth and gently rolled it around, and his body shook with a jolt of sensation. She saw him clamp his hand into a fist around the sheets beneath him as he sought to ground himself. His gesture gave her a sense of empowerment and assurance as he was expressing his enjoyment without aggression, as her previous boyfriend had.

After switching sides from one testicle to the other, teasing and licking and gently nibbling, and even taking some of both in her mouth simultaneously, a feat that still astounded Gardner despite it not being a novelty anymore, Flower Girl decided to take mercy on him and give attention to the rest of his equipment. She slid back up, took his shaft in hand and fed it into her warm, slick mouth. Gardner groaned with gratitude and approval, watching her every move now with interest and curiosity.

She loosened her throat muscles and took a deep breath as she banished memories from her past that involved a blow job that she had been forced to give her ex-boyfriend in a movie theater under duress. _'This is not that,'_ she reminded herself. _'This is lovely and oh so wanted on both sides,'_ she silently chanted to herself as an incantation or spell she cast on the proceedings.

Gardner sensed a moment's hesitation on Flower Girl's part and took her unoccupied hand in his, interlacing their fingers together and giving them a gentle squeeze. She looked up at him and saw his reassuring smile, the nod of the head and a small wink of the eye. A flood of oxytocin, that hormone associated with love, good feelings and empathy, bombarded her senses and she felt able to throw herself into the task at hand, which was to make Gardner come so hard he was incoherent with pleasure. She returned his smile and squeezed his hand in return, then resumed her ministrations.

She raised herself up and crouched over him, and began to deep throat him in earnest. As she sped up, her hair fell in her face and obscured his view, so Gardner swept it back in order to maximize all his senses' enjoyment of the experience. This made Flower Girl pause a moment and grin, then she returned to her work. Finally, Gardner was nearing the end and he was no longer really looking at anything. His vision was hazy and his head was thrashing from side to side.

"I'm, I'm almost there, Flower," he warned her.

She just nodded her head and tapped his leg to indicate he should carry on, that she had the whole situation well in hand, so to speak. Seconds later, he gave one of his unique exclamations indicating he had reached his climax, which to Flower Girl's ears always sounded a tad bit alarming in their severity, like he was experiencing something painful and maybe even medically troubling, but to which she was now more accustomed so she didn't worry. She ran her hand over his thigh to soothe him through his powerful orgasm as he twitched and groaned, cradling his flesh in her mouth lovingly until his breathing evened out.

Flower Girl released him from her oral custody and crawled up to check on him. "How are you doing, Sweetie?"

He was still breathing heavily and running his hand through his auburn hair, which was now wild and messy, a look that always turned her on because it belied the mild-mannered image he normally projected. "I'm fiiiiinnnne," he drawled, exaggerating his pretty much nonexistent Texas accent, another turn-on for her, which he knew.

She giggled and said "Good, I'm glad I could rebalance your mood after a kind of harrowing experience today."

He breathed out heavily through his nostrils and ran his hand through his hair again. "Whoa, I can't even remember what happened to me today. What are you talking about?"

She guffawed loudly. "Are you serious or joking me? You just faced down another demon from your childhood and re-learned how to drive!"

"Oh yeaaaaahhhhh," he mused groggily. "I forgot all about that. I guess sex has an amnesia component to it."

"Well that's a good thing, I reckon. There are things I don't really want to remember either," she admitted.

Gardner wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tight. He nudged her head so she'd look at him.

"What?" she asked him.

"I want to ask you something," he said.

"Go ahead," she said.

"It might upset you, though," he worried.

"If you feel you need to ask it, then whether or not it upsets me isn't relevant. I want to hear it regardless. Go ahead and ask me," she urged him.

He sighed and took a deep breath. "I don't want you to think I'm not deeply grateful for what you just did, but I just have to wonder _how_ you can do that? Doesn't it bother you? I mean, considering what you've been through in your past?"

The furrow of concern and worry about what Gardner was going to ask her dissolved from Flower Girl's face and she broke into a smile. She palmed his cheek and said "You dear, dear man. It's lovely of you to care or even think about something like that. I'll admit I do have to perform some mental gymnastics to reassure myself that what happened to me in the past with Tab and my situation with you are in no way equivalent, but no, it doesn't bother me. It's something I want very, _very_ , much." She place vehement emphasis on the second _very_ to make sure Gardner knew she wasn't bullshitting him.

He looked relieved but not totally convinced. "Do you want it because you think _I_ want it, or do you want it because _you_ want to do it?"

She reached down and palmed his dick gently, giving it a gentle squeeze. "It's something that I enjoy doing to you and with you and for you. I never had an objection to it before Tab forced himself on me. And when you and I started going out, if you remember, I gave you a blow job before we even had sex. It isn't a problem most of the time, because it's usually just foreplay. But yeah, I guess when it's the main event and I know I'm going to take you all the way to completion, I think about it a little bit more consciously and I do have to reassure myself that it's safe and that you're not going to harm me."

Gardner reached down and took Flower Girl's hand away from his overly sensitive bits and kissed her hand. "Thank you for explaining that to me and allaying my concerns. I never want you to feel threatened or uncomfortable with anything we do together, and since that's a more one-sided act, I wanted to make sure you were really okay with it."

She nodded her head vigorously. "Yeah, I'm more than okay with it. I was hungering for you. I thought that came across pretty clearly. But if it didn't, I'm glad to have the opportunity now to tell you how much I wanted to take you in my mouth and eat you all up and swallow you down."

Gardner smirked and snorted. "Flower! You're developing a filthy mouth!"

She laughed "Developing one? Honey, I thought we established the first night we decided to start dating that I already _have_ a filthy mouth! Maybe it's just that this weekend has liberated me to extend my lack of a filter to the topic of sex. But we can agree that that's a good thing, right?"

It was Gardner's turn to nod with vigor. "Yes, definitely. You have my permission to make me blush as much as you want." He paused and gave his statement some thought and then added "In private, that is."

"Okay, that's a deal. It's like that Usher song _Yeah_ , you want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed!" She started humming the tune and shaking her booty, bumping and grinding up against him as they laid next to each other in the bed. They started cracking up laughing.

The mood shifted when Gardner grabbed Flower Girl's ass and started to grind into her. Suddenly a smoldering passion began to warm between them and their lips met and then their tongues joined the dance. Gardner wrapped one of Flower Girl's legs around him and targeted his grinding motion to her center, eliciting a gasp of pleasure from her.

"You ready for me to give you some attention, Goddess?"

"I, uh, yeah, oh, yes," she fumbled for a coherent answer as he continued to grind into her, letting his fingers slide down from her ass to her coochie and enter her with his forefinger unexpectedly.

"You feel ready," he observed.

"I'm definitely revved up, Sweetie, but are _you_ ready?"

"Let me spend a few minutes of quality time with your beautiful breasts and I'll probably be ready to go again," he promised.

She nodded her agreement as he lowered his head to her breasts. He observed that she had a certain amount of beard burn from his previous application of his stubble to her sensitive skin, so he opted not to repeat the process, even though he knew she loved it. Instead, he concentrated on stimulating her nipples with his tongue and fingers. As he multitasked and gave both breasts simultaneous attention, she moaned and panted, occasionally murmuring the requests "harder" and "more." Soon her head was thrashing from side to side like Gardner's had been, and he smiled at the recollection.

Having had sufficient time to bounce back, he nudged her legs apart with his elbow and let his thumb draw smooth circles over her clitoris. Her breathing ramped up even higher but he decided to slow the pace back down to allow her to take control, which is where they had begun their weekend's journey.

"What would you like me to do next, hmmm?" he asked, as he planted small kisses on her knee and thigh. "Or should I say, would _you_ like to do next?"

Flower Girl gave it some thought, then said "I'd like to ride you. I can really _feel_ you when we're connected that way."

"What does that mean?" he asked, quirking up an eyebrow inquisitively.

She said "I mean when I'm on top of you, rubbing down against you, the contact is so much more direct and the effect is so much more powerful."

"And it makes you feel more powerful too, right?"

She grinned like a superhero whose identity had just been revealed. "Yeah, that too, I must admit. I feel like it's otherworldly, transcendent, like I'm experiencing something kind of superhuman."

"Well that sounds like a win-win situation for both of us, because when you're riding me, I'm pretty much in seventh heaven," he admitted.

He laid down on the bed and gestured for her to mount him. She hovered above him and momentarily teased both him and herself, rubbing her breasts on his face and her coochie on his dick, prolonging the moment when they would join bodies. She spread the lips of her labia and let his length slide between them for a moment as he tried to concentrate on pleasuring her upper half.

Finally, she took hold of his cock and slid down on it. She was so aroused and it was so slick with lubrication from her previous contact with it that it slid right in with no resistance. She swung her legs back and started to ride him, rubbing back and forth, creating a delicious friction. It startled her that it took mere moments until she could feel the tingle of her orgasm creeping up her legs and back.

"I, I, I, I'm coming, ohhhhhh, Sweetie," she cried, as Gardner grasped her backside and helped her along by grinding his pelvis up to meet her thrusts harder.

"That's it, Flower," he encouraged her. "Give it to me, let it all go." He ran his hands over her back and bum, undulating his pelvis up and down with her in a rolling wave. When Flower's body stilled, he hugged her close and continued to caress her.

"Ohhhhhh," she exhaled again. "My body is sparking with electricity."

Gardner snorted "Wow, that's a cool way of describing it."

"I feel all twitchy and like I said, there's all this power running through me," she explained.

"I've still got some energy to burn off," he remarked. "Mind if I ...?"

"No of course not. I was just going to ask you. How do you want me?"

Gardner objected. "Nuh uh. You said this weekend was about your empowerment, if you'll forgive the ill-timed pun. So you tell me how you want me."

Flower Girl laughed. "Okay, that was really awful! Hmmm, how do I want you? I think I want you to take me in the bathtub. Is that okay with you?"

Gardner's face lit up with delight. "Abso-fuckin'-lutely! I had been fantasizing about that."

Flower Girl climbed off of Gardner and they dashed for the bathroom. Flower Girl started the tap flowing and Gardner grabbed the bottle of bubble bath. Flower Girl shot him an amused smirk when she spotted him with the suds maker in his hand.

"Oh, so bubbles aren't just for girls, eh?" she teased him.

"Hell no," he assured her. "This stuff features prominently in my sexual fantasy. Any guy who tells you any different is either lying to you or lacks imagination."

They clambered into the tub and realized that not a lot of water would be required given the amount of space their bodies and the bubbles were going to subsume, which delighted them both as they were both anxious to get the show on the road. Soon enough they were sitting waist-high in a tub full of steaming hot bubbly water.

Gardner pulled Flower Girl in for a long kiss featuring mostly tongue, but not in an unpleasant way. It was more like he was consuming her and kissing her with his lips just wasn't enough to satisfy his hunger. When even this was not sufficient for his mouth's appetite, he moved on to her neck, where he began to nibble and suck a small love bite. Flower Girl moaned and shook as he suctioned her delicate skin.

He collected two fists full of bubbles and rubbed them on her breasts, eliciting more moans and trembling from his beloved girl. She ran her hands through his hair and down his back, digging her fingers in to try to steady herself. As if she were a spectator in her own drama, she watched with glazed vision as his fingers kneaded her flesh.

"I want to make love to you, Flower. How do you want it?"

She looked around and was somewhat flummoxed. "Well, now that we're in the tub, I really don't know what is the best way for you to come at me, Sweetie, given the amount of space we have to work with and the shape of the tub. I'm going to turn the ergonomics over to you to figure out."

Gardner nodded and said "Okay. Fair enough. Hang on." He got out of the tub and grabbed a towel, then motioned for Flower Girl to put it beneath her knees as a cushion and face the back of the tub. He whispered in her ear "I'm going to take you from behind. Are you comfortable with that?" She nodded and gave a shiver of delighted anticipation.

Gardner ran his hands over her breasts and kissed her neck and ears, then eased her forward with his hands so that she was bent over the back of the tub. He took his fingers and worked them inside of her, making sure he understood the angle and could fit himself inside of her. He also didn't want her to feel any surprises.

"Is that okay?" he asked, pumping his fingers gently in and out of her.

"Yes," she agreed, huffing and puffing at the stimulation, then groaning as Gardner let his finger glide up to her clitoris.

He removed his fingers and replaced them with his penis, entering her slowly and tentatively. "Are you okay, Flower?" he checked every so often. She just nodded her head and motioned for him to continue until he was fully seated inside of her. He reached around her and applied his fingers to her sensitive bundle of nerves again and asked "Is it okay if I touch you here, Flower?"

She said "I'd rather you just touch my breasts. I can already tell I'm not going to have another orgasm. That's a myth guys have that women are always multi-orgasmic. Or at least I know I'm not always that way."

Gardner said "Okay, fair enough. I'm glad you said something, and glad I asked." He moved his hands back up to her breasts and held on to them as he began to move inside of her. As he gave it to her from behind, he reflected on the fact that his hands were precisely where they both wanted them and that it was only because of the communication breakthrough they had achieved this weekend that they were mutually benefiting from the new, more assertive version of his girlfriend.

As Gardner neared his climax, he buried his face in the slope of Flower Girl's shoulder and sucked another love bite there. What had once felt like a complete taboo to him now felt like a liberating act, a loving gift. Flower Girl could feel Gardner's orgasm nearing by the way he was breathing and the sounds he was making and she began to fuck herself backward on his dick, meeting his thrusts with power of her own. This sent him over the edge and he grasped hold of her tightly and made his strange noises indicating he was coming. She grinned as she watched him over her shoulder.

Gardner collapsed on top of Flower Girl's back and leaned on her in the aftermath of his epic bubble bath shag. She managed to maneuver the two of them so that they were seated like they were riding on a sled, with Gardner seated against the back of the tub and her leaning against him. She released the drain plug and turned on the water taps to refill the tub with hotter water.

Smiling sweetly and a bit smugly, Flower Girl said "That was truly amazing. I think that rivals any of the books I've read for sure."

Gardner was still buzzing from his orgasm and wasn't really able to string a sentence together yet, so he just nodded and gave goofy smile and a feeble thumbs up. Flower Girl chuckled at her ability to render him so senseless.

"You're so out of it, I'll bet if I had a document here right now that said you were willing to sign over your boat to me, you'd sign it," she laughed.

Gardner shook his head and tried to frown, but it came out kind of sideways like a half-grin, merely proving Flower Girl's point, which made her laugh even harder. She kissed him and said "Don't worry, I'm not a materialistic person. I'll never take advantage of you under the duress of sex."

Gardner murmured "Thanks. That would be mean. Like me making you recite the Declaration of Independence while you're having a panic attack."

Flower Girl said "Yeah, no, I think that would be even meaner. Because when I'm having a panic attack, I'm literally out of my mind. Right now, you're just high on hormones."

Gardner palmed her cheek and said "Girlie, you're not out of your mind. It's a chemical imbalance for you, too. You know that, don't you? It's not all mental. It's physical. That's why you take medication."

She shrugged. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Speaking of which..." She looked uneasy and nervous about what she wanted to say next.

Gardner looked at her and patiently waited for her to say what was on her mind. He just nodded at her to continue.

"Well, I was thinking. It's been a really big day, and now I'm all clean and loosey goosey and the last thing I want to do is go back out again. And I know you probably have your heart set on going out for dinner at some restaurant, but I just can't bear the thought of it. There's just literally no way I can see myself leaving this room again until tomorrow."

Gardner asked "What are you afraid will happen if you leave the room?"

Flower Girl slapped the water with her hand and replied grumpily "You're going to think it sounds dumb if I tell you."

Gardner reached for her hand and took it in his, giving it a kiss. "Girlie, I will _not_ think it's dumb. We've been together long enough for you to know that I don't think anything you say or feel is dumb. Please help me understand."

She sighed and said "Okay. I'm sorry. That was unfair. Well, you may think this isn't reality, but what my head is telling me is that there are too many people out there, and they are taking up all the oxygen and I won't be able to breathe. And they're taking up too much space and they're going to stand too close to me. And they're going to make too much noise and it's going to make my head hurt. And all of that combined is going to cause me to have a panic attack. And then I'll feel humiliated and scared and start to hyperventilate and cry and get a tummy ache and then I'll be in danger and I'll die."

Gardner asked "So has a panic attack ever caused you to die before?"

Flower Girl shot him an angry look. "That is an asshole question!"

Gardner responded reasonably. "No it isn't. It's a rational question. Is you dying even within the realm of possibility?"

She shot back defensively "I don't know! It _could_ be! I mean, I could have a panic attack that's so bad that I have a heart attack and die."

He asked "What does your shrink say about that? Does he say a panic attack could cause you to die?"

She admitted "No, he said that almost nothing I worry about will happen could actually happen." Reaching for a rationalization life raft to cling to, she countered "But that's the thing with panic – it's not about what could _actually_ happen, it's what I _think_ could happen."

Gardner said "No, I think you have it backward. If you give power to what you think could happen rather than acknowledging that there are only so many things that could actually happen, then you are letting it rule over you and destroy your life."

Flower Girl nodded at him to continue his thought.

He said "Well, I mean, some of those things you listed can and _have_ happened to you and they are unpleasant. Like getting a tummy ache and hyperventilating. I've seen them happen to you. But I've seen you ride them out and prevail over them and then carry on. And they don't happen that often even. Just once in a while. In fact, they seem to be happening less and less."

"So you think I'm psyching myself out with reflexive thinking?"

Gardner said "That's exactly what I'm saying. You are telling yourself _'I can't do this because I have agoraphobia,'_ before you even consider whether the reason why you don't want to do something is because you're scared or because you just don't want to. Now let's have this conversation again. You can say _'Gardner, it's been a really long day. We've done a lot of stressful, emotional stuff, I've just had a bath, I'm worn out, and the last thing I want to do is to go out again. Can we just order some delivery for dinner?'_ See how that's different than you taking it up to Def-Con 10 with your agoraphobia?"

Flower Girl blinked at him as if she were clearing mist from her vision. "Wow. I really hadn't thought about how much I over-identify everything I do with my mental health problems. Yeah, you're right. It could just be that I'm feeling lazy and tired after a long day and it's nothing more than that. I don't have to string everything out to its worst conclusion."

Gardner laid a kiss on Flower Girl's bewildered cheek and said "Atta girl. Now let's get out of this tub, throw on some pajamas and see if we can find that takeout menu from last night."


	5. We Are Inn Love - Monday

Flower Girl awoke before Gardner. She reflected with regret that it was the last day of their trip. She still felt guilty for not wanting to go out the previous evening. Gardner had shown infinite patience with her by not insisting they go out for dinner, and he tried to get her to divert her emotions away from her agoraphobia as the cause of her reluctance. Still, the fact remained that she did feel uneasy about going back out into the world even now that the new day had dawned. She had a long drive ahead of her back home, and the thought of going to a noisy café for breakfast daunted her. She decided to ask Gardner to let them stay in for breakfast.

She gazed at Gardner's sleeping form and involuntarily a smile split her face. As usual, he was curled up among the blankets, heedless of her presence in the bed. The morning light was peeking through the curtains and shining on his reddish brown hair, highlighting its magical hue. Her fingers twitched with the desire to touch it and card her fingers through his hair, but she resisted, not wanting to disturb his slumber. She dragged herself away from the temptation by making a visit to the bathroom instead.

Even though she was completely clean from the previous night's activities, Flower Girl decided to take advantage of her access to the dreamy bathtub and have one last bath. She grabbed her book and shut the door so the noise wouldn't wake Gardner up. Eventually, she heard a knock on the door and she bade Gardner to enter.

He said "I need to use the bathroom. Hope you don't mind."

Flower Girl giggled. "Nope. _I_ don't mind. I'm just surprised _you_ don't." Gardner was usually pretty modest about such things.

Gardner shrugged. "Well, I guess we've reached a new milestone in our relationship. I am now willing to pee in front of you. If I don't, I'm going to burst my bladder."

This seemed to strangely affect Flower Girl's heart in an unexpected way and she began to cry. Gardner whipped his head over towards her and almost missed the toilet bowl as he finished taking a leak. He quickly ran over to the sink, washed his hands and then dashed over to her to run a consoling hand over her shoulders.

"Flower, what's wrong? Did I say something to upset you? Are you okay?"

She shook her head. "No, nothing's wrong." She sniffled in some snot that had escaped her nose and she laughed at herself for being so ridiculously emotional. "It's just, well, I feel so honored that you trust me now enough to pee in front of me!"

Gardner took a moment to consider the import of her words and was utterly nonplussed. "Huh," he said. "I never thought about that. Well, jeez. I guess you're right. It's a very intimate act. That _is_ pretty monumental, isn't it?"

She nodded her head and some more tears slid from her eyes, though by now her shoulders where shaking with laughter.

He gave her a kiss on the forehead and said "I'm so glad you're the type of person who notices things like this, the little shifts in the journey, the stops along the way, the subtle turns in the road."

Flower Girl looked at him admiringly. "That's very poetic, Sweetie."

Gardner blushed and cast his eyes shiftily from side to side. "Oh, well, jeez, thanks. As a matter of fact, uhhhhm, I've been writing some poetry lately, or at least trying to."

Flower Girl's head jerked up with surprise and her eyes widened. "Reeeeeeaaaaaally?" she drawled. "Do tell!"

Gardner said "Uhh, you know I'm taking a poetry class. We've been assigned to write a poem in a certain genre. I picked love poetry." He blushed prettily as he spoke the words "love poetry."

Flower Girl's grin spread. "Reeeeeeaaaaaally." This time it was a statement, stated a bit smugly, enticingly, with the words _"Tell me more, is it about me?"_ unspoken.

Squirming in the face of Flower Girl's upraised inquiring eyebrows, Gardner said "Well, I, uhm, I have written a poem that I'm kind of pleased with. I was going to read it to you at some point. I could, uhm, I could read it to you now if you want to hear it."

Flower Girl said "Of course I want to hear it! But only when and if you are ready."

"Well, how about if I read it to you after you finish your bath? I don't want to interfere with this setup. It's your last chance to enjoy it."

She said "Okay. Thank you for always, always considering my comfort and what's best for me. You are just the sweetest boy."

He gave her a kiss and left the bathroom.

When Flower Girl emerged from the bathroom, she found Gardner sitting in bed, frowning down upon his journal.

"Is your poem in there, Sweetie?"

Gardner snapped his head up, startled out of his reverie.

"Oh! Yeah, I was just looking at it, wondering whether it's good enough for me to read to you. Maybe it's not up to standard yet."

Flower Girl sat down next to him and rubbed his feet soothingly. "Hey, no pressure. You don't have to share it with me yet if you're not ready, or frankly at all if you don't want to. But I'm guessing you're being too self-critical. A few minutes ago you sounded pretty proud of it and like you wanted to share it. I think maybe you're over-thinking things now and psyching yourself out. Am I right?"

Gardner sighed and said "You know me so well. Yeah, I think I'm just sabotaging myself. The fact is, I don't know what constitutes a good poem, but I do know that for the first time in my life, I've written something that really sums up how I feel in a way that to me sounds poetic."

She squeezed his big toes playfully and smiled reassuringly. "So go on and trust your instincts and read it to me. I'm a safe sounding board."

He surveyed her expression and, detecting nothing but support and encouragement, decided to go for it.

"Okay. Here goes nothing."

**_ You, Me, We _ **

_You are you and I am me_

_Our shared vulnerability_

_Creates a stronger We._

_Secrets banished, doors unlatched_

_We roam freely through the detritus of each other's tortured souls_

_Sorting it all into piles._

_Keeping the remnants containing allegorical value_

_While heaping up for purging the toxic, lead-paint-laden, and radioactive artifacts that shimmer with dangerous threats that span a half-life exceeding our own mortality._

_Quirks and remnants transform into endearing idiosyncrasies and eccentricities through mutual support_

_Charming characteristics to be celebrated and valued_

_Where once they were the source of shame and rejection._

_As a pair we are a plant and a flavor_

_Two souls fused to each other atomically_

_Generating power and life force that radiates Yes!_

_As a We our existence transcends our individual fallibilities_

_Supporting bravery, fortitude and confidence_

_Contrails of the other's encouragement from our soaring flights of ascendance streaking behind us, transcending our self-limitations._

_And oh, the celebrations!_

_The twining of limbs, the tangling of tongues, the meeting of minds, the sharing of dreams_

_The moment of completion when thoughts and words no longer translate and all action is biologically driven and it's as old as time._

_When we give ourselves to each other body and soul, mind and heart,_

_No barriers, no taboos, all avenues open, all requests entertained_

_All identities accepted, liberation the mission, empowerment the goal, pleasure the byproduct._

_We are not our pasts, only our present as we shape it_

_Our future is ours to make_

_Not as you and me, but We._

Gardner lifted his eyes from the page and looked up to seek Flower Girl's approval. He wasn't prepared for what he saw. When Gardner had been a postal carrier, one of his customers was British, a Mrs. Humphries, who said she had grown up in the East End of London. She had a strong Cockney accent and used some very unique slang words and expressions, which she endeavored to teach Gardner. It became a game with them, with her teaching him one word per day and then quizzing him the next day on the cumulative list they built up over time.

Gardner quite enjoyed his chats with Mrs. Humphries and of all his regular customers, he missed her most of all, apart from Trudie, who was his very best friend. One of the slang words she taught Gardner was "gobsmacked," which means surprised, astounded, shocked. If Gardner were to describe the look on Flower Girl's face at that moment he finished his poem and raised his gaze to her to seek her reaction, that's the word he'd choose to describe it. She looked gobsmacked.

"So what do you think?" he asked after a few moments of silence.

"Gardner!!!" she shouted.

"What?" he whimpered and cringed a bit, covering his ears.

"Sorry," Flower Girl apologized and reached for his hands, drawing them away from his head and into her grasp. "I'm just floored by that poem! It was amazing! You have talent and insight and craft and skill that I had no idea was living inside of you. I feel like I just met a whole new side of you and I'm totally blown away."

Gardner let his body relax and unfurl, grateful for this positive verdict. "Wow, well, thanks. I'm glad you liked it."

"Like just doesn't even begin to cover it. I admire it, revere it, respect it, I appreciate it."

Now Gardner couldn't help breaking into a smile. This was going better than he anticipated and he was grateful that he hadn't let the perfect be the enemy of the good. He was glad he had just let it all hang out and read the thing to her and trusted that she would receive it graciously regardless of its artistic merit. But wow, she really liked it! Score!

"Jeez, I'm really pleased you like it. It's basically my first attempt. Maybe I'll keep at it even when the class is over. I enjoyed writing it. It kind of shifted my mind sideways, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do get it. It's like a new medium of communication. Kind of like when we were writing love letters to each other. That was really different and I felt like it was a creative way of expressing our love. I liked that, too. I'm glad you feel like you'll continue writing poetry. I think you are innately talented."

Gardner blushed. "Wow, nobody has _ever_ told me I'm talented at anything, _ever_."

Flower Girl scooted up the bed and sat next to Gardner and let her fingers play gently over his face. "I'm sorry that nobody has ever seen and noted your fine qualities and talents, Sweetie. But like you said in the poem, that's what we do for each other. We give each other that positive feedback and it builds the strength we need both individually and as a couple. And I'm honored and happy to do that for you."

Gardner puckered up his lips, requesting a kiss, which Flower Girl granted. He ran one hand gently through her hair and over her shoulder, while with the other hand he held her neck firmly in place so that he could add force to the kiss while holding her in place. It was a deep kiss, a romantic kiss, but not a sexual one. The kiss was meant to say _"I love you with everything I have to give you, for as long as you will let me."_ He drew away and spoke those words to Flower Girl, swooned a bit and responded "Keep writing poetry like that for me and I'll keep hanging around." They both laughed at the prospect.

Flower Girl rose from the bed and started getting dressed. She was put on a pink tank top, grey yoga pants, and a loose unbuttoned floral blouse that she wore like a cardigan. Gardner just stared at her as he watched her array herself in her favorite things: pink, flowers, and soft fabrics. She noticed his unyielding gaze and stopped, put her hands on her hips and asked "What's with you creeping on me while I get dressed? It's not like you've never seen me do this before."

Gardner smiled and said "Yeah, I know. But I'm not nearly tired of watching you yet. Besides, I was just thinking that the present I got you is going to be perfect for that outfit."

"Another present?" The pitch of Flower Girl's voice ranged a few octaves as she pronounced the syllables.

"Mhmm," he said, nodding and swinging his legs off the bed. He headed for his overnight bag and pulled something out. It was a small brown velvet bag. Before he handed it to her, he felt he needed to clarify its meaning.

"Okay, so, this is _not_ something of great significance, partly because I think if you wore it every day, it would fall apart because it was so cheap. And that's a good thing, because right now, it's too soon for me to be getting you anything important because I think that would rush things and mess things up between us. _But_ , I do want you to know that sometime when it _is_ appropriate, I would like to get you something important and that I hope that is where we are headed. Okay? Now you can open it up."

Flower Girl gave him a bewildered look and put out her hand to receive the small velvet bag. She opened it up and drew out the floral ring that Gardner had purchased for her at the Old Greune Market. She smiled and slipped it on her finger, turning it from side to side to admire it. "Gardner," she cooed, "I _lurve_ it! It's so pretty! And so me!"

"Well that's a relief that I picked out the right thing," Gardner admitted.

She threw her arms around him and gave him a hug and a kiss.

"Now I understand what you were driving at. Because it's a ring. And yes, I agree, this wouldn't make much of an engagement ring or a promise ring. It's kind of something I should wear only once in a while because I think with as klutzy as I am and as flimsy as this ring is, it wouldn't withstand the rigors of daily living."

Gardner crowed with mock pride "That there represents the best that twelve dollars can buy."

Flower Girl giggled. "Well, you did spend a fortune on me this weekend, between the cost of the inn and meals and that gorgeous sweater. I think it's refreshing to get a cheesy gift from you. I'm really not into spendy things as a rule anyway, though I _do_ love my sweater. I can't wait for us to go out at night so I can wear it when it's cooler out. Or I can wear it on a day when I'm in a classroom where there's really aggressive air conditioning."

"I'm glad you like that sweater. I am going to enjoy seeing you wear it. And that ring. I have to confess that I chose that color not only because I know you like pink, but because it matched the color of the first bra I ever saw you wear."

Flower Girl gave a surprised guffaw and screwed up her face in a look of concentration, trying to remember the time and place of their first naked encounter, and the make and model of the bra she was wearing.

"Oh, yes, it was a dusty rose. I remember now."

Gardner scowled and complained "That bra was pretty, but man was it forbidding. It had so many 'do not enter' signs on it. It was like it was made out of steel girders."

This elicited more laughter from Flower Girl. "That's hilarious that that's how you see it. From my point of view, it's an excellent bra because it holds my girls in place and gives me good support, while not pinching me or causing me to spill over. Oh well, you're a man. You'll never understand that for a women, finding a good, supportive, pretty bra is like the search for the Ark of the Covenant."

"I guess as long as you're willing to be in charge of removing it, I don't care how forbidding your bras are," Gardner said, as he snaked a finger down the neckline of Flower Girl's tank top and took a peek at what she was wearing underneath it. She slapped his hand and said "Hey, come on now. I _just_ got dressed. You can't undress me already. It's time for you to feed me."

Gardner made a sad clown face and said "Spoilsport. Okay. What do you want to do for breakfast?"

Flower Girl said "Well, when I was having my bath, I was thinking that I really don't feel up for going out again, but now I'm actually feeling better about it, so I'll leave it up to you."

Gardner said "I think in the interests of making the most of our stay at this inn, we should have breakfast here. Not that I'm thinking in any way about sneaking back up to the room after breakfast to ravage you one more time before we have to check out. That is _not_ influencing my decision at all." He attempted to look innocent and not at all horny.

Flower Girl laughed and said "Okay, handsome. Feed me first and we'll see how I'm feeling after I'm full of a high cholesterol breakfast."

Over breakfast, Flower Girl decided to poke at and probe the little speech Gardner gave her prior to giving her the ring.

"So Sweetie, what did you mean when you said you wanted to get me something _important_ at some time in the future? Do you mean like a new car?" She tried to keep a straight face, but she couldn't and she started to break up into giggles.

Gardner rolled his eyes. "That's _not_ what I meant and you know it. No, I just meant, well, I mean, uhhhhm..." He started to fidget and crumbled what was left of his blueberry muffin.

Flower Girl leaned forward and pinched his cheek. "I'm just givin' you the blues. Go ahead, tell me more about what you were thinking. I really want to know where your head is at with this ring thing and our relationship."

Gardner wiped his hands off on his napkin and gave a small smile to acknowledge that he forgave her for teasing him.

"I just, well, I mean, I know we've only been dating for a few months, but I just see you in my future. I see us together always. Is that too much for you? Is that crazy? Am I getting ahead of myself? Maybe that's wishful thinking. Tell me if I'm out of line."

Flower Girl's countenance was open and relaxed. He didn't detect any defensiveness or concern on her part. He let his stomach unclench and waited to hear what she had to say.

In Flower Girl's mind, the thought process was more like Time Square on New Year's Eve. There was confetti and cheering and music and abundant joy. Finally, a man who really _got_ her, who accepted her unconditionally, who wasn't trying to change her but who was supportive of whatever changes she herself wrought as a result of growth, and was excited to take that lifelong journey with her and had no hesitations about his decision. Outwardly, she evinced a bit more calm.

She said "No, it's not crazy or out of line. I feel very much the same way. I appreciate your being deliberate about things and not rushing the process, and being realistic about where we both are in our lives and the growing we both need to do before we make the ultimate commitment. But yes, I feel just as you do. I want to be with you always, for as long as that represents. For as long as you'll have me."

Gardner took Flower Girl's hand, the one on which she was wearing the ring he gave her, and kissed it. Then he looked deeply into her eyes and said "I love you utterly and completely, Flower. You make me feel things I never have before, things I never thought I'd get to experience. I'm not just in love with you, I love you. You're just such an extraordinary person. I'm really grateful to have you in my life."

Flower Girl scritcha scratched her fingers over Gardner's stubbly cheek and said "Oh, Sweetie, You're a blessing I count every day. It feels like from the very first moment we met, you figured out how to reach inside my head and make a connection with me despite all the blinders I wear and the protections I had thrown up to fend off the outside world. You're a very special person to be able break through all of my armor so instantaneously. I knew that immediately. And every day you show me how much more wonderful my life is with you in it. I will always want you to be a part of my world."

Gardner's expression clouded over and his brows furrowed. "We'll need to be careful, though. We need to do this right. There's so much that we need to do first. We need to get through school and figure out where our lives are going, and I've got to be able to support you and not let you down..."

Flower Girl moved her hand over Gardner's mouth to still his babbling worries. "Hey, Sweetie, hold up. Don't go down that road. First of all, you never have to support me. This is the twenty-first century and you're not in your parents' cult anymore. Okay?"

Gardner nodded silently.

"And second of all, who says we have to have our lives all sorted out and be done with school before we solidify our relationship? My parents were married before they graduated from college."

Gardner said "That's true, but I'm not sure it's a good idea. And maybe that's not even what I want."

Flower Girl said "Well those are two different things. I think it's more important to focus on what you want than what's a good idea according to some preconceived notion. So for now we don't have to think about it. I think we're still getting to know each other, and we're still growing up together, so to speak. But we are committed to each other and there's nothing that says we have to dot every I and cross every T. You and I are adults and we make our own rules. And we are the only ones in this relationship. Not the rest of the world. Not your parents or my parents or anyone else. Right?"

Gardner nodded. "Right. I just don't want to mess anything up."

Flower Girl said "I won't let you mess it up. I will give you plenty of room to decide what's best for you, and you leave it to me to decide what's best for me. And then we'll try to meet each other somewhere in the middle. Or if one of us is pulling strongly in one direction, one of us will give and compromise. Okay? I know that you have a lot more emotional baggage concerning marriage and things like that. So I'm not going to pin you down to anything until you're ready. But if anything, it's you who seem to be galloping ahead, not me."

Gardner blushed. "Yeah, that's true enough. I just can't help myself. From that first night we talked about dating, it's been all I could do not to propose to you."

She laughed. "Okay, well that's just adorable. But I'll take it with a grain of salt. I'm not in any hurry." She stood up from the table and asked "Now. Did you still want to 'make the most out of staying at the inn?' before we take off?" She put up her fingers like quotation marks, recalling his previous remark, indicating that the phrase was a euphemism for something else, namely, sex.

Gardner asked "What time is it?"

She looked around and checked the clock on the wall. "It's ten-forty."

Gardner jumped up and said "Shoot! We have to check out of our room by eleven! If we're going to do anything, we'll have to be quick! Come on!"

He grabbed her hand and started pulling her towards the hallway as she giggled at his enthusiasm and determination to get the absolute most out of their time in their room.

They reached their room gasping for breath, as they had run all the way. As soon as Flower Girl shut the door behind her, Gardner was on her, pressing into her, kissing her and sliding her loose blouse from her shoulders.

Flower Girl couldn't contain her laughter. "Sweetie, you really are determined to have sex one more time, aren't you?"

Gardner replied huskily, between gasps of breath, "Yeah, I am. Now strip!"

She continued chuckling but obliged him by removing her clothes as quickly as possible, while he tore off his own shirt, shoes, jeans, underwear and socks. He guided her to the bed and immediately began pressing wet, open-mouthed kisses all over her torso. He let his tongue snake out and moisten her skin until she glistened.

He paused for a moment and noticed her watching him, keenly observing his every move. This made his dick twitch and harden to its full extent. He scooped up her breasts and began to rub his whiskers on them. Her response was to arch her back and hiss and writhe and moan. Almost involuntarily, her hand moved towards her crotch and began to rub it. He watched her touch herself for a couple of moments, transfixed by the erotic sight of her self-pleasuring, then he scootched down and let his tongue meet her fingers in her garden of femininity.

As Gardner licked and nibbled, Flower Girl thrust her finger into herself. He followed her with a finger of his own and they established a rhythm of pumping in and out of her. Soon, she was using her other hand to hold her folds open to direct his tongue to the place where she most wanted it, and before long, she was crying out her gratification. Gardner kept his finger moving and his tongue nibbling until she squirmed to indicate that she was too sensitive for his touch, then he moved away and rubbed her thighs and belly with his hands gently to ground her as she came down from her high.

He crawled back up to her and whispered in her ear "Wanna take you real fast now, Flower. Is that okay?" She nodded. He wanted to make sure. "It won't scare you if I'm on top?" She shook her head no. Gardner always double-checked because her last boyfriend had been abusive in the way he had used the missionary position to dominate her and he never wanted to trigger any flashbacks. He kissed her deeply and said "I love you."

He caressed her form lightly to show he really did care about her comfort, then he lined himself up and eased himself inside of her. He made eye contact with her to make sure she was good to go and she gave him a big smile and a wink to let him know he could do as he pleased. This made him grin, and he gave her another kiss and warned her "Hold on. It's going to be a bumpy ride."

Flower Girl just had time to wrap her legs around Gardner's back before he started thrusting wildly into her, reminding her of a bucking bronco. She giggled and exclaimed "Yeeeehaw!" and hooked her feet over his backside. Gardner's eyes widened and, observing her glee, his expression softened with emotions ranging from humor, affection and sentimental gooeyness. She knew that he took great pains to make sure that sex was always pleasurable and never traumatic for her, and he apparently viewed this as another breakthrough milestone for her. She smiled broadly at him to communicate that she was reading his heart and mind.

Gardner's climax was heralded with his usual apocalyptic reaction. His pelvis continued to move long after he sounded his release and he moaned in a lower key of bliss, panting and huffing out gusts of breath. He seemed not to want to let the experience end. Finally, he stilled his hips and captured Flower Girl's lips in his for a long, slow, wet kiss.

"Wow," he exclaimed. "Usually I'm not one for rushing things, but that fast pace really pumped up my adrenalin and made my head explode."

Flower Girl joked filthily "Which head would that be?"

He thrusted one more time into her for emphasis and said "Both of them, for sure," and pulled out. He quickly moved to the bathroom to grab something to wipe up the fluids that were now running down his legs and were pooled all over Flower Girl.

She shouted to him "Let's just take a super-quick shower instead. I'm all sticky and I don't want to drive home like this."

He yelled back from the bathroom. "Okay, I'll get the water going."

They quickly rinsed off their bodies and regretfully resisted any further urges to take advantage of the sexual possibilities the bathtub/shower presented. They got dressed and threw the rest of their belongings back into their travel bags.

Gardner said "I'll do the sweep."

Flower Girl asked "What's the sweep?"

Gardner said "It's an expression from some detective show Calvin has me watch. You know how you sweep the room for bugs or bombs? I'm going to sweep the room for items we forgot to pack."

Flower Girl smiled at him like he was just the most charming boy she'd ever met. Which was the god's honest truth. "That's a great idea, Sweetie. Thanks. I'm terribly disorganized."

Gardner snorted "I hadn't noticed."

Flower Girl sassed back "Hey, don't give me any of your sarcastic back chat or you'll be travelling back to town in the trunk of the car!"

"As long as I don't have to drive us. I'm not ready for highway driving yet," he fretted.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of the drive home," she reassured him. "But you made a really good start, and we'll just work our way up to that eventually, right?"

Gardner paused his search for stray belongings and took a shaky breath. "Yeah, I suppose so."

Flower Girl walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "You're not having second thoughts about learning to drive, are you Sweetie?"

Gardner said "No, but I am still nervous about it. I have doubts about myself, whether I can do it, whether what's waiting for me on the other side of accomplishing it is more than I can handle."

Flower Girl looked confused and bewildered. "What's waiting for you on the other side?"

Gardner replied with dread in his voice "Adulthood."

She gave her tinkly trill of a laugh. "Well, Sweetie, you practically proposed to me at breakfast. How are you going to get me to the altar if you're not an adult? Or putting it another way, I think you already _are_ an adult. You wouldn't have felt like you could talk to me about something like marriage if you didn't view yourself as an adult."

Gardner shook his head in the negative. "No, I think that's what I was trying to say. I really _don't_ view myself as an adult. And I'm afraid of being an adult because of the head case my parents made me about what being an adult means. I want some things that adults get to have, like respect and independence and claiming their true love or their very own for all time, but there is so much responsibility that I'm not ready for and I don't know when I will be. I'm not sure if I'm scarred for life or I'll grow into it."

Flower Girl tightened her grip around his waist and smiled even brighter at him. "You don't have to be ready for all that, my sweet boy. How about if we just focus on teaching you to drive? It doesn't have to be freighted with moral implications or huge personal growth outcomes. The only responsibility that comes from learning to drive is not getting us both killed in a car crash. And the payoff for that accomplishment is what you said you wanted to get out of it, which is to be able to drive me places when I'm having a panic attack or to be able to drive yourself around to places. And hey, maybe you'd like to save up for your own car and drive us on road trip like this one someday. You did say one of your dreams is to travel more and see new places."

Gardner's worried expression began to clear and a smile formed on his dour face. "Yeah, I did say that. Those are some manageable goals and some nice things to look forward to. I guess sometimes I get overwhelmed and overthink things."

"I know. So do I. I call it catastrophizing. We're a lot alike. It's a good thing we have each other's support."

Gardner said "You're very empathetic, though, whereas I'm not. I never paid much attention to anyone before I met you. I was basically a misanthrope, and aside from Calvin, I didn't love or care about anyone."

Flower Girl shrugged her shoulders and said "Eh, sometimes it's a burden to be an empath. I think that's how Tab took advantage of me. He knew that I couldn't walk away from him or his faults and problems. I was too invested in his well-being and I felt obliged to fix him. I think I've learned some lessons and some balance now. But you, Gardner, I'll never give up on you unless you give me reason to."

"I almost did when we first started going out, what with hiding secrets from my childhood and not being communicative with you."

"You're doing very well now, though," she pointed out.

He leaned in and whispered in her ear "You bring out parts of me that I didn't know existed, or you're teaching me how to live in a way I didn't know how to before. I adore you, Flower, and I'll do whatever I can to keep you by my side forever."

They hugged each other and rocked and swayed. Suddenly, a knock on the door interrupted their clinch. Gardner gave a surprised look and pulled away to answer the door. There was a woman in an apron standing in the hallway with a small cart filled with cleaning supplies.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't know if anyone was still in here. I'm afraid we're rather strict with check-out times here. We have a conference group that's checking in today and we need to turn over your room, so I'll have to ask you to check out now. I'll go next door and get started on that room and give you a little more time. Thank you so much for being our guests. "

Gardner nodded his head and closed the door. He took one last lingering look around the room and Flower Girl followed suit.

"It's been a lovely weekend, Sweetie. Thank you so much for this gift."

"You're welcome. I feel like we've lived so much and loved so much in such a short time, it's amazing."

"Yes," she agreed. "Think of how much more living and loving we have to do. Let's focus on that and not our fears or doubts or weaknesses, right? It's like your poem says: _We are not our pasts, only our present as we shape it_."

Gardner nodded and held out his arms to her for one more embrace. She stepped in to them and let him caress her all over before he gave her one last lingering kiss on the mouth and one on the ring he had gifted her.

"Let's go, Mole," he said.

"Okay, Ratty," she giggled.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment, give kudos and let a friend know that this story exists. I'd like to know who is reading this story and it's a pleasure to interact with you. Thanks for reading.


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